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English
You capture the soul of it.
Its relentless toil to scratch an itch you cant get at. You said it well with different words.
strange to see you here
5ed, but don't take it serious, a few real comments
L1 is good attention grabber "hole of lack"
The Truth is a light in this darkness, shining on my evil friend.
this is good subversion of the cliche with "shining on my evil friend.'
But wait! There is no hole – nothing missing – no more to do, say or be
good return ( I would have placed it a little closer to the end)
On the hole (pardon) it wanders and drifts a little too much. and the end is a rather bland BIG statement. also watch the caps on Truth, better avoid it altogether
Truth...
And light are good. Very nicely said. Both halves of you shine here.
whatever Light you have found
I am glad at your having found it, and I pray to my own higher power that your Light may continue to guide your feet upon paths of sobriety and gladness. Your poem has blessed me, friend, brother, and I thank you. Be well and keep stepping! ;D Or whatever else has healed you! ;D
Glad to have read this
I rarely read poetry because a lot of times the poet is focusing on mechanics or showing what strange words they know. Poetry is about sharing one's soul in a way that resonates with readers. Well done.
That was very well done
It says so much in a few words. Great job, LC.
I see the light
Excellent!
Very Real
This struck a chord and hit all the notes perfectly.
Addiction is frightening. You cast light on its wretched carnivorous face in a powerful yet down to earth way. It hit me personally for reasons that are my own. "A hole of lack." What a unique and fitting way to put it. That hole is one that addiction itself chews into us. You illustrated this. Line after line it was clear that you understood the horrible power and allure, the sheer temptation of an addiction. The sad cycle it puts us through. The struggle everyday to resist and allow the hole to close, lest it be opened more and more and more.
This had a down to earth feel to it, which I really liked. The imagery was very fitting and gripping. The tone was right, one of constant self question, constant reassurance, and seemingly never ending struggle.
Very well done here.
A good dive below the dark waters of addiction...
...and luckily, resurfacing at the end. Several of the lines in the poem are searing, starting with the first pun, "Addiction is a hole of lack." It does well bringing out the feelings of trying to fill a black hole, an un-fillable void, in straightforward language, easily accessed. And for many addicts, sadly, the second half of the poem never comes about, does it?
I liked it
Out of the Darkness means something different to me. As I read the poem, I couldn't help but imagine the addiction mentioned was cutting. Out of the Darkness is often used when speaking about suicide. It refers to the possibility that suicide helps a person get out of the darkness of mental illness they suffered in the physical world. It also refers to the survivors of failed suicide attempts. That eventually we will no longer want to complete suicide; that we will be able to move on with our life (I am still waiting for it). Finally Out of the Darkness refers to people who have lost loved ones to suicide. After a person dies in any manner, there is a period of darkness for the survivors. I have lost two siblings to suicide, and I believe the darkness after a suicide lasts longer than the darkness that comes after someone dies from an illness or even a car accident. I think it is because there are questions that will never be answered. When a person dies from an illness, the survivors know why. When a drunk driver kills someone, the survivors know why... The drunk person was incredibly irresponsible. I will never know why my siblings chose that last day as their last day. I know my siblings were ill, but they were ill for years,so what specifically happened on that day that made them decide to complete suicide? I can never answer all the questions about that last day.The note left behind by one of my siblings gave some insight, but there are still questions. That is why I personally believe that the darkness after a suicide lasts longer than other manners of death. Thank you for sharing this poem and thanks for allowing me to comment.
Touching!
Very well written!
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