Co-Workers Become More

"Than" is the word you need.

"Then" denotes any TIME other than right now.
"Than" is a word used for a comparison:

"I know you a lot better THAN you think I do, bro."
"... a few weeks earlier THAN he met Lucy... "
"Lucy was an inch shorter THAN Maria.... "

"They ate, then went to bed."
"We went to work then."
"Well, let's do it then."

See the difference??????

nice

A nice short tale. you did not go crazy with super sizes BS.. so you used the wrong world, the world did not end. most writers make grammar mistakes. what do they want for free.? is that all he got out of your tale?

My apologies...

I am sorry to the Anonymous Grammar Police. As my punishment I will go listen to "Weird Al"' Yankovic's song "Word Crimes", because clearly I have committed a crime. I guess it's easy to point out someone's faults hiding when you are anonymous.

But I did appreciate the other Anonymous comment. I am glad that you can see past my grammar and enjoy my story!

First Lucy has brown eyes and then she finishes up with green eyes. It's a nice story but you should spend more time proof reading before submission.

Bit quick

Disappointed that you didn't develop the characters and storyline rather more before reaching the slap and tickle section. Not sure that the romance comes through a quick punch on the nose. You created a good basis but seemed to rush to a conclusion.