A Day at the Beach

Prison Memoir?

This is awful. I am guessing that you are as well.

Very Bad!

I understand there is a segment of our population which lives for this. However, most of us are not that inclined. This was not good writing, IMO.

Could have been better

I understand there is a segment of our population that reads Non-con. stories when they're not at all into it. For the rest of us, this story has a good basic line, but your spelling is bad and you change tenses in the middle of the story a few times. You just need someone to read it over before you post it. Not a bad attempt, try again and you'll do better.

1 star is too generous

As distasteful as the subject may be, your writing "skills" are even worse. Don't give up your day job mowing lawns.

they're assholes

Don't let their negative comments get to you. Keep writing!

get a life and PLEASE learn how to write, you idiot

Dont Understand...

Yeah, your writings not the best. You need to work not not changing tenses. Pick one and stick to it. Also, spell check. But for those of you who dont like the rape fantasies, dont complain. Just stop reading them and commenting. Rude. Some of us do like rape fantasies, get a life and go away.

Good try

It could use some cleaning up and a little more detail but I enjoyed the story line. To all the naysayers please be quiet. Some of us do enjoy rape fantasies so please don't trash it...don't like it don't read it.

re: anonymous-good try

How are you supposed to know if a story is any good if you don't read it? Do you guys even bother to see what you write? Some of you readers are just as bad as the writer. As to the guy calling others "assholes" for not liking this story, look in the mirror fellow and what do you see? I'm not going to discourage you from writing "brockin", but please read what you write before posting. Get an editor to help you improve the short sentences and poor grammar. Lots of free ones on this site. Even though I found the writing trying, I'll give you credit for trying. 3*

Crap

Funny how all the comments are anonymous. This story is sick i really do not know why i bothered to read it. Women are worth more than this it does not do it for me.
Not afraid to put my name on what i have to say.

First or last name?

I see you are real brave to reveal your name in your comment. Is bluemoves01 your first or last name? How do you know the name of other commentator's is not "Anonymous"

To The Anonymous Pansy

If you don't like rape, nonconsent/reluctance is stories about forced sex, and it's all fantasies. If you do not like it, fuck off. Twat.

Otherwise a good story, you need to work on a few things but keep trying mate.

hmmm

Funny, I find the straight-up rape stories a lot less offensive than the "she said no but really wanted it because all women are sluts" stories. IMO those indicate much deeper rooted misogyny. Rape stories are (for most people) just a power fantasy.

Don't stop writing

Personally ... I got off. That was the point. Of course you could do some proofreading but I thought the story line was a good one. Keep writing and you will keep getting better. I enjoyed it!!!

Good story

I am a female and love rape fantasy stories. I agree that the stories are better when it's straight up rape and not she said no but really wanted it. If you don't like the stories, don't read them. Pretty simple.

I liked it

The storyline was well done and I enjoyed myself. Spelling and grammar could use a bit of polishing, but otherwise it was good.