All Comments on 'Weird Sisters Ch. 01'

That was great. Hope the next chapter comes soon.

Well done

Great story. Please, keep the story going. Can't wait for the next chapter.

I always enjoy a story by someone who can string words and ideas together. You can. Nice job

!

Nicely done...twist at the end...awesome descriptions of such HOT sex...great story!

To me, at least, it would have been better to start the anal sex more slowly. More touching, more fingering, more tonguing, perhaps a little butt plug (or vibrator) insertion, more teasing, more getting used to and then really liking it -- than jumping headlong into it.

I gave it 4 stars.

Pretty good, but three main things stop this from being great.

1- Repetition. This is the most basically issue. You repeat yourself a lot, saying the same thing over and over in different ways. Kinda how you said in 10 different ways how good Deb's asshiole felt in one paragraph.

2- Focus on the mechanical action. While your description of the actions is pretty good, it does get repetitive after a while. You really should focus more on the feelings and emotions felt duriing it. You're surprisingly dry j. That regard. While the actions get huge descriptions, were just told that X or Y felt amazing or great and that's it. Show us. Don't tell. Unpack stuff.

3- Hold back the adjectives and adverbs. Specially adjectives. They should br used sparsely or else the readers get bombarded with info they don't process. There's a reason we use verbs a lot more. Makes the reader dive in. This ties in show don't tell, since eadjectives are usually cheap ways to void unpacking a scene.

This a good story by the talented, but occasionally too verbose, ZenZerker.

This story features a particular fetish: a man cums in a woman’s ass and keeps going. The man can ejaculate twice or even thrice without pulling out after the anal creampie or he can pull out and then immediately reinsert to continue the act.

I leave this comment as a marker in order to help identify more stories with this kind of fetish.

You can check my favourites for other examples that I have already identified.

Please message me or copy this message under a story to help expand the collection.

Thanks!

Re-read this after a log time and still SO hot! Couldn't remember how she told her sis she'd beat her...

have regained a boner when I stayed in my sweetie's cunt , but not her ass....

Prefer mish style when we do it so I can see her beautiful face when she cums

And don't recall a 2nd part when I first read this...goodie!. Lucky Jeff...sexually ultra-competitive wife, and she hadn't mentioned doing a 3sum yet

Gave it a 5 first time-would again if I could-but will fave this time.

My two favorite words (and kryptonite) BUBBLE BUTT. Made me jealous with he have all three wholes in short order

Yes, the comments are really good, and some of them are pretty on-point with the observations. Fewer adjectives-👍 good, need to ✔ check grammar...yes...

Also, just a little attention to anatomy...there are actually (2) membranes separating vagina and rectum...but still cool to hear someone talking about the sensations of feeling 'whatever' moving in-and-out, putting pressure against each other!!

I love this story about crazy 'weird' sisters, twins, and their interactions!

**5**Stars, so well-deserved...on to next installment!

It needs a proofreader to correct errors you missed.

i love to assfuck women!

Enjoyable read

As much as I like where this story is going, the adjective assault was brutal. They need to be reduced by a good 80% IMO

Really good story starts well developed and absorbing.