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English
First chapter?
As a standalone story, this doesn't work for me, as you left too many questions unanswered, and nothing actually happened other than dialog. It is a decent setup to a longer, multi-chapter story, but you should have indicated that if it's what you intended.
Will be part 2?
This was interesting...Will be part 2?
a lot of things
don't work for swinger joe the least of which is his brain.
COMMENT
It was a nice short little tale. Nothing more is necessary.
MichaelG
Tournament parents need love too.
Great story. Building nicely in a realistic fashion. I enjoy that it has a reality connect. Keep the good work up.
Tournaments!
When our kids were in sports in high school we were always traveling for tournaments. Many times either my wife or myself would go alone, leaving the other home alone as described in this story.
The best aspect of this story is that it is very authentic, low key and plausible. This whole scene could happen to any soccer mom or dad! With my consent my wife spread her legs for a few coaches and other soccer dads over the years.
It certainly spiced up our sex life and it was just so naughty and erotic!
One sign of a good story:
... it freaks out the anonymous, infantile name-callers.
But even without that: nicely done!
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