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Don't You Remember?

bybutttickles©
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by Anonymous

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by Epiphany_Jones10/07/14

The story fell rather flat.

This story seemed to lack any kind of spark to get my interest. It could have been the tense in which you wrote it (First Person can be tricky). It felt "phoned in", if you know what I mean. Like, if it was a stage production, the people involved would have been mumbling their lines in a bored monotone and just wandering to their marks.

Not attempting to be cruel, just offering an honest opinion.

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by Anonymous10/11/14

Liked it

A little tease that got me wet. The possibilities are delicious.

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