...and I am growing fond of all your characters. You've done a great job getting all of them well fleshed out. This is a wonderful first effort, and an interesting setup for future chapters. Thanks for sharing, looking forward to the next installments. Cheers! --- Josie
To both my anonymous critics - first and foremost, I AM SORRY. It's true that I got carried away with my first effort, desperate to see it published and ignoring the cardinal rule that I learnt right from school - check. I should have editted before sending it off.
Leaving aside that enormous slip on my part, I would still like to know if, despite the errors here and there, is the story and plot worth reading? If it's not, then there's no point in writing further chapters and wasting yours and my time too. If, on the other hand, it is 'yes', I can assure you that I'll spend more time on editing than on writing my piece. Thanks, either way!
by
Anonymous10/08/14
Definitely keep writing
The mistake was glaring, but even so I think it's a good story and would love to read more. Keep writing!
Ignore the minor issues.. just write more.. I want to know what happens next..
by
Anonymous10/08/14
Well...
Kinda seen this story before, names changed, better writing. Why not do something more creative once you get your typo issues out of the way? Uncles wanna fuck him. Kinda old.
by
Anonymous10/08/14
It should have been me!
Love this theme. Your characters are great. Don't worry about the typos and please continue. What a wonderful vulnerable position to be in with Brad......
Theres a lot of warmth in the interaction of your charecters, i can understand your need to see your story finished & for people to read it, i hope that your future chapters will have the same warmth in them but also that you'll split your time equally between writing & editing, if the storys good enough a few errors are easy to forgive :)
by
Anonymous10/09/14
Can't wait
I can't wait to hear more. So sexy
by
Anonymous10/10/14
No no
I think I've seen this done better elsewhere. What a waste of time. If that makes me a hater, fine. Fuck all you wankers who want to praise a piece of SHITE like this.
by
Anonymous10/10/14
Great story concept, need editing help.
I liked the concept of your story, but you really need to spend time editing. For example, the girl whose clothing you are trying on is your cousin, not your sister. To be honest, reading the story left me with the impression that it was written in a different language, and then translated to English with software. Great concept, liked the story, please spend time editing, or ask for editing help here.
Yes Namowa, you do have a compelling story here...
In response to your query, yes. There is a story here and you should persue it. If you feel like you need an editor there are lots of them available who will do it for free (Have you ever tried to find an editor in the outside world who would do it for FREE??? they don't exist). Take advantage of it!
No need to apologize, you're creating something and that takes courage and talent. So, welcome to the TG/CD world here on Literotica and welcome to the company of writers whose creative talent the haters love to tear apart because they don't have it...and never will.
Please do share more of this promising and warm story with us. Dont let the critics stop you. Editing issues can be handled, but creativity like yours is a gift that many of us want you to continue to share. Your story and character work makes me want more. Please dont let the haters get to you.
Well done. Captures some of the feelings nicely. I once wore a bra under my jumper as I was home alone and our neighbour stopped to chat. I was terrified he would notice. Scary at the time. Exciting thought now. :-)
Totally relate to the magazine images and being held around the waist by a man
Xxxx
Amanda.
English
Your cousin becomes your sister mysteriously. Got editing?
Wonderful storyline...
...and I am growing fond of all your characters. You've done a great job getting all of them well fleshed out. This is a wonderful first effort, and an interesting setup for future chapters. Thanks for sharing, looking forward to the next installments. Cheers! --- Josie
Apologies
To both my anonymous critics - first and foremost, I AM SORRY. It's true that I got carried away with my first effort, desperate to see it published and ignoring the cardinal rule that I learnt right from school - check. I should have editted before sending it off.
Leaving aside that enormous slip on my part, I would still like to know if, despite the errors here and there, is the story and plot worth reading? If it's not, then there's no point in writing further chapters and wasting yours and my time too. If, on the other hand, it is 'yes', I can assure you that I'll spend more time on editing than on writing my piece. Thanks, either way!
Definitely keep writing
The mistake was glaring, but even so I think it's a good story and would love to read more. Keep writing!
More please
Ignore the minor issues.. just write more.. I want to know what happens next..
Well...
Kinda seen this story before, names changed, better writing. Why not do something more creative once you get your typo issues out of the way? Uncles wanna fuck him. Kinda old.
It should have been me!
Love this theme. Your characters are great. Don't worry about the typos and please continue. What a wonderful vulnerable position to be in with Brad......
Sounsd like you already solved
your own problem. Please continue writing. The story is still good. screw the haters.
Keep it up
A nice beginning from a lovely writer.
please continue
Theres a lot of warmth in the interaction of your charecters, i can understand your need to see your story finished & for people to read it, i hope that your future chapters will have the same warmth in them but also that you'll split your time equally between writing & editing, if the storys good enough a few errors are easy to forgive :)
Can't wait
I can't wait to hear more. So sexy
No no
I think I've seen this done better elsewhere. What a waste of time. If that makes me a hater, fine. Fuck all you wankers who want to praise a piece of SHITE like this.
Great story concept, need editing help.
I liked the concept of your story, but you really need to spend time editing. For example, the girl whose clothing you are trying on is your cousin, not your sister. To be honest, reading the story left me with the impression that it was written in a different language, and then translated to English with software. Great concept, liked the story, please spend time editing, or ask for editing help here.
Yes Namowa, you do have a compelling story here...
In response to your query, yes. There is a story here and you should persue it. If you feel like you need an editor there are lots of them available who will do it for free (Have you ever tried to find an editor in the outside world who would do it for FREE??? they don't exist). Take advantage of it!
No need to apologize, you're creating something and that takes courage and talent. So, welcome to the TG/CD world here on Literotica and welcome to the company of writers whose creative talent the haters love to tear apart because they don't have it...and never will.
Yes, Namowa, please do continue
Please do share more of this promising and warm story with us. Dont let the critics stop you. Editing issues can be handled, but creativity like yours is a gift that many of us want you to continue to share. Your story and character work makes me want more. Please dont let the haters get to you.
Love it
Well done. Captures some of the feelings nicely. I once wore a bra under my jumper as I was home alone and our neighbour stopped to chat. I was terrified he would notice. Scary at the time. Exciting thought now. :-)
Totally relate to the magazine images and being held around the waist by a man
Xxxx
Amanda.
great start
well written and nicely developing
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