As The Sun Dial Turns

Nefretiri (?)
Should it not be Nefertiti? Probably a typo.

Powerful and imaginative! I thought you could have expanded a little more in your introduction on the holy aspects of Egypt's polytheism, before passing into everyday's affairs and the nitty-gritty of the heroine's life, but still the rest of the poem gives her inner reasons very imaginatively and I believe truthfully for escaping into her own monotheism and Sun Dial religion, a nice contrast with the monotheism of her man escaping into his own monotheism in the desert.
I especially liked his seven fucks with seven different maiden (what a weekly routine!) and your last reference to the "vindictive" god of Abraham who soon will kill all first born children in Egypt.
Beautiful stuff. 5ed and recommended!

@ pelegrino

The spelling of her name is borrowed from the 1956 movie by Cecil B. DeMille featuring Charles Heston, Yul Brynner, etc.

Although ...... Nefertiti's titties would make for a good poem on its own.

Thanks for the very generous comments and recommendation.

Nefertiri

The name Nefertiri is correct. She was the Egyptian woman who lusted after Moses when he still lived in the palace as part of the royal family.