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English
Welcome to Lit!
You did OK with your first story! The grammar and punctuation could have been a bit better, but you got your point across. There could have been some explanation as to why this girl would just happen to have rope, a strap-on and handcuffs in her bag, but the lack of this doesn't really detract from the story too much. Keep on writing! Will we get to find out what happens to this guy next? Maybe Olivia will go fetch all her girlfriends, and they'll take turns humiliating him.
A nice first submission!
Congratulations on your first published story; it was very readable. You obviously have a great talent, but need to work on your presentation a little. Keep writing -- it is the only way to improve, and you have started so well. Welcome, well done, and have five stars from me!
Good story!
Great first effort! A continuation would be most welcome.
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