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English
Really?
The fantasy was wearing a bit thin with the entry of "grandma", but an entire chorus of naked supermodels? I was beginning to lose interest, however I felt I should give the story a chance. While this is an erotic fantasy, it's not one that has logical flow to entice a reader to continue. I would humbly suggest that the mother and aunt were sufficient. And, that perhaps having the daughter/fiancé arrive would have worked. Grandma was a bit over the top and the alien supermodels is beyond bizarre. I am aware of the irony of accepting an alien "flashlight", and not naked, green haired, supermodels. However, I was enjoying parts of the fantasy as it was intended.
The story had an interesting plot, potentially good characters; if underdeveloped, and the hypnosis coupled with the incestual storyline was enjoyable.
Thanks for the attempt.
Oh Oh !!!
SusanJill,
The story was really getting good at Grandma, but the Super Models went off the rails for me !!!
Lee
It's a shame !
I agree with the last 2 comments. You lost it with the super models. You, also, dragged it out too much thru repetition. If you continue this story, I don't see how you can fix it.
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