The confusing part is why Liam decided to fuck her in the first place. It starts out nicely - he's trying to take care of her, proving he is different from his family. Then all of a sudden he's fucking her? Why? There's no hints he's attracted to her. A decent start, but needs more build up.
by
Anonymous12/09/14
Great for a quickie, story could be developed
I quite liked this little read, It was a good quickie and I love vampires. Someone said it was crappy BDSM but not everyone likes it 100% hardcore. I think you've done quite well for your first story and I shall be checking back for more :)
I like it:) would like to read more please; the fact that he's different from his family makes me curious to see how he will be taking care of her after this.
English
Confused
Somehow this seemed to be missing another page or more,this feels unfinished before it was submitted
take out the vampire crap and this is a crappy bdsm story,which I wasn't looking forward too
Plot jump...
The confusing part is why Liam decided to fuck her in the first place. It starts out nicely - he's trying to take care of her, proving he is different from his family. Then all of a sudden he's fucking her? Why? There's no hints he's attracted to her. A decent start, but needs more build up.
Great for a quickie, story could be developed
I quite liked this little read, It was a good quickie and I love vampires. Someone said it was crappy BDSM but not everyone likes it 100% hardcore. I think you've done quite well for your first story and I shall be checking back for more :)
I like it:) would like to read more please; the fact that he's different from his family makes me curious to see how he will be taking care of her after this.
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