A Grip on Reality Ch. 01

Good hook,

I'll be interested to see how you haul it in.

Great Bones

This has the bones of a wonderful story can`t wait for the rest of your tale'

curiouser and curiouser

Welcome back...

Wow

Hell of a ch.1. Happy and sad at the same time. I have an idea what happened I just hope I'm wrong. Can't wait for chapter 2.

Five Big Stars

Thank you...

I enjoyed reading your story. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Great so far...

... something in the coffee? Just a guess...

Loving it

five stars. Usually I loathe multi chapter stories, preferring instead to read a tale in one sitting. But a chapter one from FM means there is more FM on the way! That is definitely a good thing. Feel free to make this as long as need be.

Good setup. I'm guessing the wife gave him a poisoned coffee. Maybe she's in it for the money. But then again, maybe that's exactly what you want us to think. Can't wait for part two.

Because of the category,

we might assume the second wife is a problem. The only other character is the partner, so let's make a guess that the guy's problems will be traced to his wife and his partner. Well written, as always, and you have my interest. How the guy learns about the wife and partner and what he does when he finds out will be the story.

Always good to see your byline under a new story.

Looking forward top reading the rest of the installments.

Ben Re-Invents the Credit Union

Then takes acid.
Looking forward to the next chapter.

Oh boy

I hope she didn't poison him. The quick wedding made me wonder about her. I am starting to feel sick myself.

SOMEONE GOT DOSED WITH LYSERGIC

now let the tale begin and tell us the 4 Ws. TK U MLJ LV NV

THIS COULD BE A SPIN OFF FOR

the Usual Suspects. TK U MLJ LV NV

Of course you are supposed to think it was the

wife and his partner, (what with a major buyout looming on the horizon that Ben was sure to block). But what if it was one of the other female employees who was resentful because Ben had spurned her advances while he was still a grieving widower? Maybe this jilted employee has something going on with Ben's partner, but I have GOT to believe that FM will provide some sort of twist in there, somehow. And I want it to be a well earned surprise. The obvious set-up of being drugged by Celia is just too obvious; as obvious as the crooked nose on her face.

If it IS Celia, then maybe it has to do with blackmail from her ex-husband the abuser from Miami. But I'm sure the clues are here in this well set-up chapter one SOMEWHERE.

Thanks FM! So good to read a new thriller from you! This morning, yours was the first story I opened, and I am sure it will the best availible. It is hard to say just how gateful readers like me are for your continued contributions here. THANKYOU SO VERY MUCH!!!!!

a tad heavy on the hokum

The narrator is 50 shades of beige incarnate. If someone doesn't do something nasty to someone sometime soon , scores of readers will perish of diabetes.,

One word describes this one . . .

. . . intense! Wow! Okay, I just used a second word and I really could add a few more adjectives, even a sentence: Petty damned good job of writing and storytelling. I wonder what comes next? Is Elizabeth going to give some from the other world commentary on Cilla? On Peter? On the buy out offer?

I'll close this with the word I chose to start off with - intense.

Well, I had a comment but HDK said it better...

...and with fewer words. Thanks for sharing your stories, I'm looking forward to ch. 2.

There is a certain reader that keep asking the question...

Why are you reading "loving wives"? This story should answer your question. There is more to "loving wives" than swinging and willing cuckoldry. Author,always looking forward to reading one of your tales. As always you don't disappoint. This is what loving wives is all about. I rest my case.

Title as much a clue as category

Some people have wondered where the hook is into this category, but just as interesting is where the title fits in.

Is it a hallucination? Will he start having communications with his deceased father and first wife?

Please, just don't . . .

make the plot hinge on someone otherwise really smart doing something really stupid. Be more clever and witty than that. Already hokey that the wife had to go get his coffee instead of a waiter bringing it. They are at a formal dinner. The femme fatale is just too obvious. It will be very cliche and disappointing if his wife and partner are linked either romantically or criminally. And if he has no prenup, did no background investigation, and married within a few months of meeting Barbie then he deserves whatever follows. She deceived him to get the initial interview; helloooo. So she showed no other signs of dishonesty or manipulation during their courtship? Oh, that's right, she's mesmerizing. I guess most bankers and successful business men never experience con artists. Now, go and throw us for a loop with a great continuation. I love clever writers.

That was quite a last half page

not that the preceding 2 1/2 pages were boring, just that the LSD trip at the podium was COMPLETELY unexpected.

Now youa re a very good writer, so I eagerly await remaining chapter(s). I do hope you post consecutively, as it is oh so frustrating to read a serial story in bits and pieces, one has to constantly go back and skim the previous story.

Onward Francis Mac-4 stars for this opening, thx for your efforts.

Entertaining

Need I say more?

Very good - Keep going!

I really enjoyed this first chapter. I like the characters, the plot, and the way you're telling the story. I look forward to the next chapter.

Not trying to be too something or another...

But why can't just have had a stroke?

Of course, if you want to get sticky, all of it could have been a hallucination from a stroke earlier... but I think better of the author than that.

Green-something

Outstanding Start

Look forward to the conclusion

Who is involved?

Are the wife and the partner working together or is she working for Big Global Bank on her own? Can't wait to find out.

4* for now...I'll rate it in the end...

4* for now...I'll rate it in the end...But that last coffee must have something to do with it...

Good start

Which STDs cause hallucinations? My guess is an STD given the category.

Something in the coffee.

More Please....

You left us hanging for more....

Last paragraphs kinda reminds me of "Windowpane"....

acid but, " Who dunnit " ?? We'll be tuned in for more.

Great start with all the Love; pain's, rain and then glowing Rainbows.

Thanks for sharing on Lit.

x

Now you got us guessing, poison or heart attack or something else

Great start to your story , now that you got me I'm waiting for chapter 2 .

It started well

Then it turned better. 5*

I don't trust that Cilla.........

It's the finger up the ass....... very suspicious. She is up to something.

Great Beginning*****

Thanks for sharing.

I can't ever remember giving you anything but a 5...

This is no exception. You're one of the best!

Banker Vs." The Banksters" (?)

Our 'Compassionate Capitalist" should have augmented his college education wuth a course in Political Ponerology, then he might have seen this coming...

GREAT START

let me think here. if he already owned a bank im sure he got a prenup. i bet his second wife tried to poison him.

A taste of aluminium?

My guess is that he accidentally swallowed a Boeing 707 and choked.
It can happen if you walk around with your mouth open.

Fascinating

This transition took me by surprise. It did sound like his new wife was a huntress, could she be working for a competitor? I loved the idea and spirit of his bank. His reality was a bit out of focus at the end of this chapter.

now that I clicked

I looked at the tags. Our friend is in for a rough ride.

No Score Yet

Interesting so far, though I do have to agree with some comments that I've read, that this doesn't seem to be quite up to FM's earlier work.

On to Ch 2!

You never know where or when you are going to learn something

I didn't realize wine was alcohol free.
But, based on the promises he made, and kept:

"Ben would never forget what a person dying from cirrhosis of the liver looked like, and he swore never to touch alcohol as long as he lived."

Then later:

Dinner was even more enjoyable than their prior sessions, undoubtedly helped along by an excellent meal accompanied by a fine wine.

Taste of aluminium?

To me it seems our hero has been poisoned vua the coffee by his huntress new wife. I do hope the husband character was sensible to have a prenup !

Bizzare

The end was just over the top. My reaction is what the hell happened? I also feel we have another story on Lit that is unfinished, and the reader is just left hanging.

Story was cruising alone and then it fell off the cliff

The last few paragraphs were just bizarre. The walls were melting? Wtf? Is this about to be Sci/Fi? UGH!

WHEN EVER YOU THINK YOU HAVE A GRIP

a false step could mean a big slip. TK U MLJ LV NV

Fascinating start

Congrats. That was extremely well written. Four out of five. Initially I thought it was one long, slow, sad build up. I won't lie. I got a bit impatient. But it was so well written I stayed with it. Then the ending which was obviously him having his drink spiked meant you had something interesting in mind. Is it is new wife or his partner who secretly wants him to sell out to the big bank? Or something completely different. I look forward to the next chapter. Cheers. Steve

Could Have Been A Five, But...

After all he's been through, he finally reaches the top, and you kill him off?

Still 4 stars for a well-written story, but this one deserved a happy ending.

There is a part 2

There is a part 2. It explains things quite well. Francis gets a 5 from me.

https://www.literotica.com/s/a-grip-on-realit y-ch-02