Note: You can change font size, font face, and turn on dark mode by clicking the "A" icon tab in the Story Info Box.
You can temporarily switch back to a Classic Literotica® experience during our ongoing public Beta testing. Please consider leaving feedback on issues you experience or suggest improvements.
Click hereyou bury yourself in words, hoping to become invisible
you hope we see you, not as you, but for what the background will lack
thickening your emotions until they become your armored skin
mystifyingly tiny in that emptiness you call your space
no one, not even tenuous conscience, can claim you as their own
so you wait in cloying ennui until sorrow becomes that wall
and the sun drops behind it, that right-angle-shadowed wall
nearly suffocating in its thick and invisible
comfort, making sure you have false hope shadowed on your own
brickwork, knowing it may only be yellow-ness you lack
yet leaving pastel nestled in its cozy back-drawer-space
no longer peeled back and vulnerable under that skin
facades become mastery over toughened skin
precipices are camouflaged beyond that wall
it is your own reflection you fear in that space
you go to when hope becomes invisible
you can concentrate on manipulating lack
embrace the sweet unknown until it is your own
something -- anything -- that is all your own
not seeping out from gaps beneath your skin
only palpable in what closings lack
backing anxieties against that wall
smudging ashes of dread invisible
and you can once again claim amber space
expand until you fill that space
remember, dear: your heart's your own
I'll wait inside, invisible
curled inside your close, waiting skin
stillness crumbling that blackened wall
giving those forging tools you lack
I hope you see that lack
and find a yellow space
seep through gaps in that wall
widen them on your own
let brightness touch your skin
forsake invisible
invisible, you see your lack
bring back your skin, expand your space
you aren't your own, erase that wall
This poem was mentioned in the Archival Review thread, in a picking through Lit's archive of over 36,000 poems.
----------
darkmaas, I thought the same thing!! very subtle indeed, isnt it a sesto, Cordelia? I read it early the morning it was posted, I voted, but didnt leave a PC cause Iwas worried about getting it "wrong"... its a beautiful poem :)
Apart from the lovely imagery, there's a subtle form imbedded here. So subtle, lol, I had to have it pointed out to me. Does it have a name?
seems to me that what seperates a Master from the rest of us mere rhymers is the ability to make a vision conform to an arbitrary rule without seeming to be constricted by it. Hats off!
Apparently it's your friends giving you rave reviews.
of many of the ideas I've been experimenting with. You've shown me exactly how they should be blended together.
A form
Enjambment
A single metaphor that flows assuredly into another and never loses the essence of the original illustration.
Palpable paring of words until you're left with bare bones meaning.
Thankyou for this lesson.
Carrie