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Click hereThe maiden stumbled once and she shook free
never wondering what the future holds tight
in hand, there in a kingdom by the sea.
The maiden stumbled once as she shook free
her hair. No fear as she turned back to fight
the lords and matrons of society.
The maiden stumbled once. Then she shook free
never wondering what the future holds tight.
R28
I had to read it a few times to get past some phrasing and words I didn't like. As a whole it's a good sequence of images. "future holds tight" didn't work for me at all though. I think you've done other triolets? Maybe I'm thinking of Tess. "hair. no fear" I didn't like the sound. But this was a rare poem for me, it carried itself on sentiment.