hard work

bytodski28©

Weary, that pivotal point between fatigue and death
teetering
Push on with gritted teeth,
gritted so hard they may splinter,
Along with my sanity

Hands calloused, hardened like my smile
shins scabbed, bleeding
Ignore things not life threatening
can't stop, but must slow for the flesh is finite
limited

Hour upon indentured hour,
watching the saw dust plume and billow
The drone of the saw punctuated by high pitched screams
As board is separated, devoured by the blade

This is the theme music to my life,
Listening to the shrieking cries of aluminium,
The wounded sounds of rended wood
The high pitched hiss of scored glass,
The dull thunk as the score fractures

Yet all these cries and screams give birth to something else
The end result a satisfied smile at hard work rewarded
Tired eyes revel in creation

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by Anonymous

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by todski2807/06/13

Didn't think about the ing sound

Thank you for the comment 1201 made me take a second look at my wording structures.

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by twelveoone07/06/13

consider this

teetering/ teeth
bleeding
hear the long E, kind of screams at you, doesn't it, (what you want in context)
not sure about the ing sound
5ed btw

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by erectus12307/05/13

excellent

to write about what one knows and experiences is illuminating

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by todski2807/05/13

this

piece was wrtten after 33 hours of non stop work, I hadn't slept so I was feeling more than a little sorry for myself, hence the fatigue, death and teetering lines.
Thanks for the encouragement. I likemore...

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by Angeline07/04/13

For someone new to poetry

you're doing a lot of things right imo. The poem overall feels authentic with an urgent, passionate tone. The more specific you are, the better you sound. Lines like these~

"Hour upon indentured hour,
watchingmore...

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