Interaction, storm and pine

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Maria2394
Maria2394
22 Followers

For months there was shade
then lightning struck the pine
outside our bedroom window.

Since the storm
it has existed, exposing
scars branded onto its body.

Yesterday the tree was felled
by men with chainsaws and heavy boots.
The sparkleberry also fell; victim

to logistics in the felling of the pine
and the shade was sucked screaming
into the steamy ground.

Maria2394
Maria2394
22 Followers
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TsothaTsothaalmost 10 years ago

For me it all hinges on the last two lines, and what powerful image you conjure there. A shade sucked screaming? It's the last thing to go, long after the pieces of plant-body are taken away: the memory of a shade on your window. Screaming, because it's missed. It's the specter of a tree, of something that was once there.

"Sucked" into steamy ground, the ground now heats. The shadow dissolving into it, remaining a moment longer than the tree. Makes me think of an horror movie. Not sure why.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 13 years ago
Oh my goodness...

But I can’t help myself.

At the risk of being tarred and feathered and rode out of town… I couldn’t keep this poem from reminding me of ‘killing two birds with one stone’… or of ‘’lightning striking twice’ (directly, then indirectly).

And then the loss of both trees must certainly be enough to cause one to ‘Pine’ for both of them.

Sorry, too many metaphors in my coffee this morning, I suppose…

But, one heck of a poem. Thank you.

Sincerely,

Jes_da_man

Esperanza_HidalgoEsperanza_Hidalgoabout 13 years ago
pine

I hate nature's destruction of nature--and man's ruddy interference. Okay, but the poem--just the right amount of words to convey meaning. Reads great to my espie ears.

vrosej10vrosej10about 13 years ago
~

Wow. I would not change a thing! I wrote a poem with a similar theme a while back called Requiem for the Green (before I was a better poet). This got me in the guts. Getting a recommend. Wish I could give it six!

PaashaPaashaabout 13 years ago
I have an affinity for this poem.

I enjoy all things nature though I have a special kinship with trees. The fall of the tree and the good shade it provided is really a loss. Que sera, sera even with the Mother. Well done.

Deja_twoDeja_twoabout 13 years ago
Liked your poem.

I can't match in quality but it brings back memories of a big old oak that stood in a field opposite my house. Whether the following words be poetry or just an outburst of my emotional ramblings I dare not say...........................................................

I’m touched far too often when I read of fallen trees

For memory of a dear old oak that was severed at the knees

I watched that brutal carnage on a sad September day

As they ripped my dear oak apart and tossed its life away

I think my oak saw Trafalgar, but I don’t know that for sure.

Could he have been the planks of wood washed up on a distant shore

I makes me feel patriotic as life echo’s famous words of then

“Heart of Oak are our ships and more so are our men.”

Best wishes

twelveoonetwelveooneabout 13 years ago
*

agree with others, as said in other comment, you are a powerful writer

100!

UnderYourSpellUnderYourSpellabout 13 years ago
~

I also hate the felling of trees and hid when some of ours had to come down, can hear the poor trees screaming in this

fridayamfridayamabout 13 years ago
O what great images

Such a beautiful poem, redolent of anguish.

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