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Click herethe washbasin
is a yellow porcelain
that must have once been white
the mirror
spidered glass in which
her meth-cooked face
blooms a fungal plastic
the black teeth
need to be bleached
by God
for no mortal dentist
can revivify
the undead molars
in the blistered graveyard
of that mouth
and there
as it should be
in the far corner of the picture
quiet atop the toilet
rests the filmy glass pipe
your word choices are fresh and bring something new to the poetic table-- the undead molars, plastic fungus?? keep writing!
Tackling the horror by creating two forms of contrasts. The first, based on the aesthetic tradition of figurative paintings of what used to be considered "beautiful", including the type of title used for this purpose. Then planting the object which had been transformed from past beauty to present degradation which is closely tied to death. <P>
The second contrast is in the use of scientific nomenclature in the poem - to further distance the beautiful object which is no more - and put in on a level of a physical object only. Very good work on creating the right impact with out "telling" too much. <P>
I was reminded of an educational TV add which targeted young people who presumably were/are at higher risk of falling into the drugs trap. It starts with a beautiful woman showing, and then it proceeds with her taking off variety of false parts which were hiding her true physical features. I will not go over the details, but the transformation from beauty to physical distortion is quite horrific. Hope it worked. This poem sure worked for me.
the image you present is scary, but sadly, it is real. Addiction is a disease, but so often, it is a disease of choice. we choose what we get addicted to.
last week, in the county where I live, there were 6 meth labs "busted" and about a dozen in the month before that. If meth only came with a disclaimer and photos, of what happens after just a few months of use.
This work would make a great PSA, along with a pic that morphs.
hope to see more from you