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Click hereAfter their shudders subsided, he stayed in her as long as possible. Soon, however, she could hold him inside no longer, and he rolled over onto his back beside her. She laid her head on his chest, and Elizabeth crawled over to lay on his other side. With satisfaction, Liz watched as the two people she loved most in the world drifted off to sleep.
This is a great second part to the story. Please tell us more, only sooner. Tell us of the events leading up to the wedding and then the wedding. Will Elizabeth and Darlene be pregnant when they are married?
VVVEEEERRRRRYYYYYY Erotic, good writing, and an excellent build of sexual tension. However, I do wish you hadn't cut off the ending, there is more than just plunging in thru her cherry, first u enter, reach the hymen, and ask if she's ready and then push gently thru the obstruction, let her feel the pain, then the pleasure. In other words, use more wordage.
It IS an excellent read tho.