A New Beginning

Against all expectation, she barked a short laugh and then looked at him, "What did you mean, surrounded by people who love me?"

"Your brothers love you and... and I love you."

She returned into her embrace and said, "That's nice."

They sat together in silence for a while and then she released him and said, "Come on, let's go downstairs, Brian will think we've run away," as she spoke, she gave him a sad smile. Lynne buttoned up her blouse and they returned downstairs.

The rest of the evening was spent in relative silence; the three members of the household were content to spend time lost in their own thoughts.

Nathan was thinking about how lovely Lynne looked when she smiled. He just wished her old smile would come back, not the sad half smile that played around her lips now, her real smile. He was also thinking about how much he loved her. And much as he tried to put it out of his mind, he was thinking about the sight of Lynne with her blouse open. He stole the occasional glance at her as she watched television. She was quite the loveliest woman he had ever seen, but perhaps he was a little biased.

Lynne was thinking about Nathan and how supportive and thoughtful he had been. She had always had a soft spot for him. She had never thought of him romantically before, but now she wasn't sure. He had always had a somewhat sensitive nature, but she was only just coming to understand what a good man he was. She sighed inwardly, why couldn't she have fallen for him, instead of... She stole the occasional sly glance at him whilst he watched television and for the first time noticed how handsome he was.

Brian was thinking of new and interesting ways to make Jimmy's last moments on Earth as exquisitely agonising as he could. He was also stealing sly glances at the other two as they pretended to watch television and smiled.

The next few days followed the same general routine, after Brian had gone to work, Nathan and Lynne would enjoy a leisurely breakfast together, she would run through the classified ads of the local paper looking for a job and then they would decide what to do for the day. Sometimes they would go for a walk, or perhaps enjoy an ice cream in the local ice cream parlour. Once they even went to the seaside for the day.

But mostly, they just sat about the living room and chatted. And talked. And gossiped. About everything. Him, her, what he liked, what she wanted out of life, the price of fish, everything.

Lynne had not felt so relaxed being alone with a man in months and she really enjoyed it, especially a man like Nathan. He was thoughtful, considerate and charming. And he never took liberties, no matter how much he might have wanted to. She found herself actually looking forward to the day he would summon up the courage to kiss her.

One morning, they were sat in the kitchen just after breakfast and Lynne was reading the paper, she reached for her coffee without looking and knocked the cup onto the floor. She looked at the broken cup lying in a pool of spilled coffee and then she looked back up at Nathan. He was sat staring at her with an expression bordering on fear. He whispered, "It's only a cup. It doesn't matter."

She half smiled, shrugged and agreed, "It's only a cup."

Nathan quickly moved round the table, hugged her and planted a kiss on her lips. Then embarrassed at his own daring he pulled away, "I'm... I'm sorry Lynne."

Lynne considered what had just happened. She had broken a cup; something that would have earned her a savage beating from Jimmy had just earned her a kiss from Nathan. She found she liked it. His breath was sweet and his lips tender.

Lynne carefully picked up his cup and looking him in the eye dropped it on the floor, then she held out her arms to him, "Do I get another?"

He laughed and said, "I don't believe you just did that."

She replied, "I'll smash every cup in the house if it means that you kiss me again."

Nathan took her hands and pulled her to her feet and then placed his lips against her own once more. He started to pull away after a second or two, but Lynne's arms snaked around his neck and held him tight, prolonging the kiss.

When they eventually came up for air, Nathan whispered, "You don't know how long I've wanted to do that."

"You don't know how long I've wanted you to do it."

He looked into her eyes and slowly moved his face towards her for another kiss. Because they were so busy, neither noticed a figure pop up at the window and watch them with a scowl, before melting away again.

Nathan led Lynne through to the living room and they sat together on the sofa. He put his arms around her again and her hands came up to hold his head. They closed their eyes and kissed again. As their lips pressed lovingly together, they slowly opened as their emotions grew stronger, soon Nathan had insinuated his tongue between Lynne's lips and gently touched her own. She responded warmly and her hands snaked around his neck to hold him firm in her grasp. Lynne moaned quietly in her throat as his soft moist tongue wrestled with hers. His embrace became more passionate and she could feel his arms trembling as he held her, just like her own arms trembled as she held him.

Lynne felt his left hand start a slow journey from her back, round her side, over the bulge of her malformed rib...

Her eyes shot open.

She pulled away from him and stood up.

Confused, Nathan gaped at her and asked, "What's the matter?

Lynne couldn't meet his gaze, she covered her face with her hands and said, "I'm sorry Nathan... I can't do this."

Confused, he stammered, "W... Why?"

Lynne shouted, "I just can't!" and then ran to her room sobbing. Nathan followed her and hammered on the door, but she had locked it behind her and ignored his entreaties to talk to him.

Dejected, Nathan returned to the living room and sat in silence until Brian returned home.

"What's the matter Nathan?"

Nathan explained and Brian nodded sagely, "I understand. She wanted to, but she was scared. After what Jimmy put her through, I'm not surprised, " with a heavy sigh, he continued, "But if anyone can help her, you can. I've seen the way you two have been looking at each other. Tell you what. I'll give you both some privacy tonight, after all I feel a bit like a spare prick at a wedding at the moment. I'll sleep over at Tommy and Julie's and that'll give you two this evening alone, after all today's your last day of holiday. Okay?"

"Oh Brian, you don't have to do that."

"I want to do it. I miss Lynne's smile. The one she used to have and I want you to get it back."

After Brian had packed a small overnight bag and left, Nathan returned to Lynne's door and called, "Lynne, I know you're upset at the moment, but I really don't know why. No pressure, but if you want to talk then you know where I am. Okay?"

There was no answer, but he had not really expected one so he returned to the kitchen to prepare a sandwich. He was eating when Lynne appeared in the doorway; her eyes were red with crying. Nathan smiled gently and said, "Hello. There's a sandwich going if you want one."

She shook her head, but sat down at the table across from him, "Nathan..." she began.

He stopped eating and waited for her to continue. She pinched the bridge of her nose and then said, "I just wanted to say sorry, about this morning. I didn't mean to lead you on."

"It's okay Lynne. I understand—"

"UNDERSTAND? UNDERSTAND? YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING!" She shouted, her face a mask of fury.

Quietly, "So tell me Lynne, and maybe I will."

Barely able to keep from screaming, she snarled, "You can never understand! How ugly I am... what he did to me... What I let him do to me!"

Nathan remained sat in his chair, ignoring her rage and replied, "I can try, if you'll let me."

Suddenly, Lynne thrust the sleeves of her blouse up her arms and showed Nathan the circular scars that were dotted about her forearms, "Look at these!" She ripped the blouse from her body and stood up, turning her back to him, "Look at my back!" She started to sob and rubbed her hand forcefully back and forth, through her hair before continuing, "I used to be proud of my body! Now look at me! I hate myself; I hate what I've become. I feel so ugly, I don't know how you can look at me without throwing up!"

"The scars don't matter."

"THEY MATTER TO ME!"

Nathan stood up and came round the table to comfort her, as he reached out, she pushed him away and shouted, "DON'T TOUCH ME! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Stung, he answered, "Why won't you let me help you?"

Lynne buried her face in her hands and said, "Because I'm scared. I want you and I'm so frightened that it'll all be the same..."

Angry himself now, Nathan shouted, "Don't you dare! Don't you dare compare me to that... animal who did this to you!"

She spun round to face him and slapped his face, "DON'T YOU TELL ME WHAT TO DO! YOU'RE ALL THE SAME!" Nathan stood there and accepted the blow. As he felt his cheek redden he said, "No we're not Lynne."

Lynne started hammering her tiny fists against his chest, "Yes you are! You're all the same, you start out being all nice until you get what you want!"

Nathan wrapped his arms around her as she sobbed uncontrollably, still lashing out at him, "What happened to me?" she wailed, "I used to be a nice person!"

"You are a nice person, you're a lovely person."

"NO! I'm ugly and I'm stupid and I'm worthless! And I hate myself!" She gradually stopped pounding her fists into his ribcage, she wasn't very strong and Nathan could easily ignore her blows. But still she bawled.

Gently, Nathan eased her away and said, "I wish I could make you realise that the scars don't matter. Jimmy gave them to you, and he told you all those horrible things, but it wasn't true, the stupid, ugly, worthless one in that marriage was him not you."

He let his finger touch her, still slightly swollen and discoloured eye, "Some scars will fade," his hand dropped to the bulge in her ribcage, "And some won't. But it really doesn't matter. Not to me. Because I love you. You, the you inside as well as, if not more than the you outside. And to be brutally frank, I think the you outside is beautiful too."

Lynne stepped away from him, "I know your game. You say the things you think I want to hear until you get what you want! You just want to fuck me, and then what? Brag about it to all your friends I suppose."

"That's not true Lynne and you know it."

"Then what do you want?"

"I want to make you happy again. I want the old Lynne back."

Angry again, she shouted, "WELL SHE'S GONE! GONE FOR GOOD AND SHE AIN'T COMING BACK!"

Nathan sighed heavily, "No, you're right, the old Lynne's gone, but that doesn't mean that the new Lynne can't be happy."

She started moving her hand back and forth through her hair again and said, "Do you think I don't want to be? I do, but I don't know how."

Nathan reached out to stroke her cheek, "Then let me show you."

Suspicious, "How?"

Gentle, "Let me show you how it should be."

Uncertain, "I... I don't know. I mean, I want to trust you but..."

Quiet, "Don't be scared. You need never be scared of me, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do."

Nervous, "I can stop whenever I want?"

Soothing, "Whenever you want."

Slowly, carefully Nathan reached out and placed a feather light kiss on her lips, she shivered slightly, but allowed the kiss to continue, to develop. Nathan put his arms around her and she returned the embrace. His fingers played up and down her spine, sending tingles through her body. Her own hands remained motionless as she held him, still unsure of her emotions.

He pulled away slightly and said, "Perhaps we should go somewhere more comfortable. I don't think the kitchen's suitable for what I have in mind."

Still a little suspicious and not yet over her anger, Lynne agreed and allowed Nathan to lead her to his room.

Nathan indicated his bed, it was a large double and said, "Lie down on your front."

She did so and after kicking off his shoes, he knelt on the bed next to her, "You're very tense, I think you need a massage," gently he ran his finger along one of the thick red welts that decorated her back and asked, "Do these hurt?"

Lynne mumbled, "No, not any more."

"Okay, just relax now. I want you to enjoy this."

He started to rub her back with slow sweeping motions travelling up her spinal column, over her shoulder blades and down her sides. Once or twice, he snagged his fingers in her bra, so he stopped his massage and placed his hand on the catch. He waited, asking a silent question.

"Yes, if it's in the way."

Nathan undid her bra and she raised herself slightly to shimmy it down her arms and off, then Lynne lay back down again. Once she was settled, he started to rub her skin once more.

After several minutes, he started to concentrate on her shoulders and neck. Lynne couldn't help but let out an involuntary moan as his warm, strong hands eased away the tension in her muscles. She murmured, "You're very good at this."

He just whispered, "Shhh. Lie still and enjoy."

He shuffled up the bed and started working on her arm from shoulder to wrist, making small circular movements with his thumbs. He could feel her cares dropping away under his careful ministrations. Once he had dealt with her other arm in the same way, he moved back to the foot of the bed and said, "Raise your hips, I need to take your skirt off so I can do your legs."

She did so almost as if she was in a trance and he slid the garment down her legs, being careful to leave her panties in place. They were of thin, white cotton with a cherry motif on the backside, and he could make out further scarring on her buttocks through the material.

Nathan carefully took Lynne's left foot and started to massage it firmly, she giggled as his thumb ran long the sole, "Sorry," she said, "I'm a bit ticklish there."

He replied quietly, "I'll be more careful," and continued with his work. After a while he transferred his attention to her other foot and made sure that he didn't tickle this time, before starting on her calves and the backs of her thighs and then onto her buttocks. Lynne stiffened slightly, but when she felt his hands make no attempt to go between her thighs she started to relax once more.

Once he considered this part of the massage finished he asked, "I'll do the front now. Would you like your bra back first, before you turn over?"

Lynne was pleasantly surprised by the question; it showed a consideration that she was not used to. Also, she surprised herself by just turning over to lie on her back, "No," she said, "I think I'll trust you for the moment."

Involuntarily and perhaps, naturally Nathan's eyes were drawn to Lynne's breasts. They were fairly small, barely a handful, but they were firm and upstanding with very little sag as she lay on her back and they were tipped with the most delightful coral coloured nipples. Nathan could tell that she was not excited, merely relaxed and for the moment trusting that he would not do anything to upset her.

He smiled and then began working his hands up and down the fronts of her legs and thighs. As he worked up nearer to her hips, Lynne's breathing subtly changed, it became somewhat shallower and she parted her legs slightly so he could work his hands over the soft velvet of her inner thighs. Nathan was very careful not to touch her too intimately and at one point was forced to stop for a moment so he could rearrange his growing erection into a more comfortable position. Even just lying still on the bed Lynne could arouse him more than any other woman he had ever been with.

Not sure he could trust himself any further in that region of her body, Nathan transferred his attention to her midriff. He worked in tiny circles over her stomach and up to her ribcage. His knuckles brushing briefly on the underside of her breasts as he moved to her sides and down again. He felt tiny spasms as his fingers slid back along the waistband of Lynne's knickers over her stomach before starting the entire cycle again.

After some minutes of gentle rubbing, Nathan was surprised when Lynne took his hands in her own and slid them up and onto her breasts. Neither moved until she opened her eyes to look at him and whispered, "Show me... Show me how it should be."

Nathan leaned down slowly and paused just before his lips met her own. He looked into her eyes and whispered back, "I will." His eyes closed and he kissed her. Quick, feather light kisses first on her top lip and then the bottom.

He traced the line of her jaw with his mouth, stopping every so often to flick out his tongue until he reached her earlobe and began to nibble on it gently. Nathan slid his hands from her breasts and one snaked up her chest and behind her neck so he could rub the base of her hairline with finger and thumb. The other hand moved up and down her left side from the side of her rapidly warming breast to her hip.

Lynne couldn't help but let a soft moan escape from her lips as she succumbed to the loving sensations Nathan was arousing in her. Never had she felt so loved, so adored. Her skin tingled wherever his exploring fingers touched and she felt her head turning almost of it's own volition as he started to trace the line along her jaw and back to her tender lips. She wanted to kiss him again, not the rapid little butterfly kisses he had bestowed so far, but a proper kiss. A kiss of passionate lovers.

Their lips met and Lynne opened her mouth slightly so she could reach out with her tongue to brush against his own. Deep in her heart of hearts, she was waiting for the rough thrusting of an uncaring man to force himself into her mouth, but that never happened. Nathan fought down his rising passion, wanting to keep things slow and gentle. He didn't want to scare her, so he just allowed his own questing tongue to return the soft manipulation of hers, carefully they engaged in their oral wrestling match and still Nathan let his hands wander slowly over her silky, soft skin.

Almost with thought, Lynne reached out and started to unbutton Nathan's shirt until it was totally open. She pulled it out his trousers and brushed it over his shoulders and down his arms. Nathan found himself unable to continue with his own explorations whilst this happened so he quickly pulled it off and threw it onto the floor before returning to her body.

Once his upper body was naked, Lynne began her own tactile exploration, she delighted in his clean aroma, and she wallowed in the feel of his well-toned muscles, such a difference from her husband. And she also found herself desperate to feel him touch her sensitive areas. She wanted him to feel her breasts and her nipples as they hardened with expectation and arousal. Lynne was also starting to feel a need between her legs, a need that had been missing from her life for so long. A small patch of dampness appeared on the front of her knickers.

Nathan let his wandering hand fall to the outside of her thigh. One finger traced a line over the top and on to the soft skin between her legs before moving up and over her pussy. She felt a spasm in her womb as his finger ran over her swollen pussy and back up to her belly. The touch, almost too light to feel was driving her to distraction.

Lynne's own hands also did not remain lazy. She pushed his body away slightly so she could get to his belt and undo it. She had a little trouble with his buttons and his fly, so Nathan reached down to help her. Once opened, he shimmied his trousers down his legs and lay next to Lynne in just his boxer shorts. He jumped a little when she started to handle his hard penis through the material and gently wanked his length.

Nathan placed his hand over hers to stop her and nuzzling into the dip in her throat murmured, "Not yet, there's plenty of time."