A Witch's Valentine's Love Portion

Just as Chad had told him, the path led down before leading up and winding out of sight. He climbed a small albeit steep hill that winded to the right and as soon as he neared the top of the hill, he could see a chimney. There was smoke emerging from the stack. There was someone home. If this was all just a joke, at least, Chad wasn't lying about a house being here in the forest.

Only, as he neared the house and the house came into full view, he felt an eeriness and an evilness, when the forest suddenly fell quiet. What small creatures he heard stirring about before, chipmunks, rabbits, and birds, stopped moving about. Nothing was stirring. Everything was still, everything was quiet, and there was nothing moving. He was nervous now, jittery and afraid.

"I'll kill Chad if this is a joke. I'll kill him for scaring the shit out of me," said Ritchie for no one to hear.

His imagination was running away wild with him. He had a fleeting thought of turning around and returning, running actually, back to Chad's car. At least, he hoped Chad was still there and that this wasn't all a big joke played on him. It would be a long walk, ten miles or so, back to town, if he had just left him there. Some Valentine's this would turn out to be stranded in a forest.

The house appeared like any house, only it was small, tiny actually, and he couldn't imagine that there was more than one room. It was more of a cottage than it was a house and he could tell that this little house was built by hand. Definitely, by all the gingerbread everywhere on the house, it was old.

The front porch, when he climbed the petrified wooden steps, was rickety and squeaked from the weight of him. There were hanging plants everywhere with an overgrown garden out front and off to the side. He didn't dare go around back to see what was there. She must grow everything she needs, he thought, suddenly thinking of her stirring up the contents of her big, black caldron with dead and dying things.

Just then a black cat with a screech and a hiss, appeared from out of nowhere and scared the shit out of him. It ran helter-skelter across his path and disappeared in the woods. Setting aside his superstition for black cats crossing his path, he continued to the front door. For sure, he was glad the creature was gone and equally as glad that he didn't make eye contact with the animal, as per Chad's warning.

He took a big breath and knocked at the door. He heard nothing and saw no one. Everything was so spooky quiet. He knocked again.

"Go away," he heard a muffled woman's voice call out from a distance.

Ignoring the voice he knocked again.

"What do you want?"

"My friend, Chad, I'm a friend of Chad," he said louder and nervously repeating himself, "sent me. He said you could help me."

"Help you? Help you with what?"

"There's a woman--"

"A potion? You want a love potion? Is that it?"

"Yes, a love potion is what I want."

"Well, you should have said that before. Come in, come in. I just made a fresh batch."

The door squeaked open and Ritchie couldn't believe his eyes. The house appeared so small, tiny actually, from the outside but inside was huge and modern. It was so deceiving. He wondered if what he was seeing was a spell. Only, was the spell that he saw on the outside or the inside of the house.

"Hello?" He stepped inside and the door quietly closed behind him without him touching it. "Hello?"

"I'm in the kitchen," he heard the same woman's voice. "Continue straight ahead."

There was a woman in her late thirties, a very attractive women, a beautiful woman, actually, with long black hair and shiny blue eyes standing by the kitchen stove and stirring a big aluminum pan. The kitchen with its black granite countertops and stainless steel appliances was a chef's dream kitchen.

"Hi," he said relieve that the woman wasn't a witch or didn't look anything like any witch he had imagined.

"I'm Isadora," she said flashing him a bright, white smile.

"I'm pleased to meet you. I'm Ritchie," he said pocketing his hands, now more relaxed that Isadora the witch was more Isadora the MILF. Damn, suddenly, he wished he could have her instead of Heather.

"I know who you are," she said without giving him a look.

"You do?" Ritchie gave her a curious look. "How do you know who I am?"

"I saw you last night in my crystal ball."

"You did? You have a crystal ball."

"I did and I do," she said with a smile. "It's there on the living room table. Only, don't touch it. Don't even look in it. It's only for those who know how to use a crystal ball. You'll go blind if you look into it."

"C'mon," said Ritchie with a laugh. "There's no such thing as a--"

"Don't laugh at me," she said in a stern voice. "I don't like being laughed at or made fun of."

He remembered the man from the city trying to take her land by eminent domain. After the stern look she gave him, scared him with, he couldn't help but wonder if she really didn't drop a tree on his car. It was a long scary walk back to Chad's car. Ritchie decided to be on his best behavior.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you," said Ritchie taking his hands out of his pockets and standing as stiff as a soldier at attention. "I didn't realize."

"It's okay," she said handing him a small bottle that was still warm from its freshly poured contents. "This is your love potion," she said.

"What do I do with it?"

"You must get the person of interest to drink it, all of it. It is important that they drink every drop. Best you wait until it cools and then mix it with something else."

"How do I do that? I mean, what does it taste like? Will they know this is something weird or--"

"My, my, but you are such an inquisitive little man. You do ask a lot of questions, don't you?"

"Sorry," said Ritchie. "Only, I've never done anything like this. "Will this really work?" He said holding the bottle up to the light.

"Put the bottle down," she said in an impatient voice. "Don't hold it up to the light, you'll weaken the formula." She gave Ritchie a smile. "So long as the person drinks the contents of the bottle, all of it, he will fall in love with you," she said putting a hand to her hip and staring at him.

"It's a she. I'm not gay."

"Whatever," she the woman waving a hand of disinterest in the air. "Sorry for thinking you were gay. You do have effeminate qualities about you."

"I do?"

"Never mind. It's just the way you talk and walk is why I thought you were queer."

"Queer? I can assure you that I'm not. I'm heterosexual. I like women, love women, actually, which is the reason why I'm here for this love potion. Perhaps, because I'm educated, enlightened really, is why you think I'm gay or queer, as you put it."

"Boy, I got your panties in a bunch, didn't I," she said with a laugh. "I apologize for thinking you were of another sexual orientation."

"Apology accepted," said Ritchie focusing his thoughts on the potion. "Must she drink it from the bottle or can I pour it in a glass or a cup?"

"So long as she drinks it all, you can pour it or mix it in a drink, if you'd like."

"What does it taste like?"

"Chocolate milk," she said with a little sly laugh.

"Do I dare ask what's in it?"

"Oh, a little of this and a little of that."

"Thank you," he said holding the bottle, as if it was nitroglycerine and turning to walk out of the house.

"Are you forgetting something?"

"What?" He turned to stare back at her expecting her to fire a lightning bolt at him or a curse.

"The cost of the potion is $300."

"Oh, sorry. Chad told me that it would be a few hundred dollars. Thank you," he said putting the potion down on the counter to reach in his pocket and to count out three hundred dollars in twenties. He handed her the money and she accepted the cash and stuffed it down her blouse and in her bra.

"I have a gift shop out back. I make my own candles and I have autographed photos of me with celebrities," she said. "And I make jewelry, too," she said.

Just as Ritchie couldn't imagine what was in the love potion, he couldn't imagine what was in the candles she made. He imagined her having photos of her with Regis Philbin, Dick Clark, Barbara Walters, and Diane Sawyer. Then, he wondered if maybe she helped others, Tiger Woods, perhaps, and Bret Favre. Wow! If she did, he really didn't want to know. He just wanted to get the Hell out of there, before she took a disliking to him and before that black cat returned.

"No thank you," he said hoping not to offend her. "Maybe another time. I just wanted the love potion, thank you very much, anyway."

"Tell your friends," she said giving him a wave with her wooden spoon.

"Okay, I will," he said knowing he'd never tell a soul that he hoped to win the heart of a woman by using a witches love potion on her nor would he ever return there.

Ritchie practically ran from the house and down the road. Afraid of dropping the potion and breaking the bottle, he held it close to his chest hoping that he didn't trip and fall. As soon as he thought about tripping and falling, he stopped running and walked at a brisk pace. There in the distance was Chad's car. Thank God.

"Did you get it?" Chad looked at him with a different look of trust knowing, no doubt, that they shared a secret. Now, each had the help of a witch.

"Yeah, this is it," said Ritchie holding up the bottle.

"What do you have to do with it?"

"I just have to mix it in a drink and make sure she drinks it, all of it, every last drop of it."

"You better not slip it to me," he said with a laugh.

The next day and the following days after that, Ritchie went to the library and every time he passed by Heather's desk, he made light conversation with her. From asking her where to find a certain book to asking her about the book she was reading, it was his intent to gain her trust. Over that week it was obvious that they had become friendly, friends, actually. At least she knew who he was. He was ready to go for the next step.

"I'm going out to Starbucks to get a cup of coffee. Can I bring you back something?"

"Oh, would you? I so need a cup of coffee," she said reaching for her purse. "I'm falling asleep reading this book, it's boring."

"Please, it's on me for being so nice and helping me find the books that I needed," he looked at her and smiled. Chad was right. She was very pretty and smart, too. Definitely, she was his type of woman. He couldn't wait to get his hand on her big boobs. "How do you take your coffee?"

"Extra cream, please and one sugar."

"Got it. I'll be right back."

Once at Starbucks he poured out a bit of the coffee and replaced the cream with the love potion purchased from Isadora. He added a bit of cream to be on the safe side hoping to disguise any of the taste. He was so very nervous. What if she doesn't drink it all? What if she takes one sip and doesn't want any more of it because it tastes funny? What if it doesn't work and it was all a scam and a hoax and he's out three hundred dollars? There's no way he's going back there and asking for the return of his money.

Quickly, he walked across the street to the library and took the opportunity of giving her the coffee to chat with her. He needed to make sure she drank it. He needed to know if she drank it all. Maybe, he needed to be there in her line of sight for her to fall in love with him. Otherwise, perhaps, if she spotted someone else, while drinking her coffee, she'd fall in love with them. He didn't know.

Isadora didn't give him any other instructions and he was stupid not to ask. He was just so intent of getting the Hell out of there. So, he stayed by her desk chatting about some of the books he read hoping to impress her. Only, she impressed him by reciting a laundry list of books she read. Nonetheless, during their impromptu conversation, it was obvious that they were made for one another.

As soon as she accepted the coffee, she took a sip.

"This is delicious," she said looking up at him and taking another quick sip. "Actually, this is the best coffee, I've ever had." She took another longer sip this time, before looking up at him. "Did you spike my coffee with Bailey's Irish cream?"

"No, of course not," said Ritchie. Why would I do that?"

Ritchie took a step back figuring she suspected him of foul play. He was sweating bullets waiting for her to drink all of it. Besides, he wanted to give her a better look of him when she did drink it all.

He liked her, he really did and he could see spending the rest of his life with Heather. She was a good looking woman. Yet, more than that, she was smart, well read, had a sense of humor, and she had a rack, too. Definitely, she had C cup boobs, as Chad, the expert, said she had. He couldn't do better than her if he spent the rest of his life looking. He was quickly falling in love with Heather.

"I'm just kidding with you," she said. "It's just sometimes you hit it right with that place and other times the coffee at Starbucks tastes as if it's been sitting there all day, you know. I guess we hit it right this time because I'm loving this cup of coffee," she said gazing up at him. "It's delicious," she said with a pause, "like you."

He couldn't believe it. She was making eyes at him. She was giving him the eye. Suddenly, she made him feel taller. With every sip she took of her specially flavored coffee, her smile widened. He could see in her face that she liked him, really liked him, loved him, even, maybe. She was in love with him. He couldn't believe it. Heather was in love with him.

"This coffee is good," he said. "Usually, I don't drink all of my coffee," he said trying to entice her to drink all of hers, "but today, I plan on drinking the whole cup, every drop."

"Me too," she said taking a big gulp of coffee and another and another until the cup was empty.

He couldn't believe it. Heather drank it all. She did it. Now, we'll see. Now, we shall see.

"Heather, I, uhm, wanted to ask you, if maybe, uhm, if you'd, some time, you know, go out with me, maybe, uhm, to a museum or out to a movie or--"

"I'd rather you come home with me," she said. "I have something I'd like to show you." She turned to her co-worker. "Elizabeth. Cover for me, please. I'm taking the rest of the day off. I'm not feeling very well, suddenly," she said giving Ritchie a wink and a smile.

Heather didn't live far from the library, just around the corner, actually. She lived in a one bedroom condo that was perfect for one and yet big enough for two. Only, as soon as they walked in the door, she pushed Ritchie up against the wall and kissed him, French kissed him.

"Heather, I--"

"I've been dying to do that for the longest time," she said. She kissed him again before reaching down the length of him and cupping his package through his jeans with her hand. "I can tell you like me, too," she said tracing the outline of his cock with her manicure fingernails.

He couldn't believe she was kissing him, French kissing him. He couldn't believe she was feeling his cock through his pants. He couldn't believe it when she unzipped him, reached her hand inside and pulled out his cock. This was more than he ever expected.

He watched her look down at his erection before she fell to her knees and took him in her mouth. He couldn't believe it. He couldn't believe Heather was giving him a blowjob. He was just shocked that the potion really worked. Now, he had this beautiful woman sucking on his cock and giving him the best blowjob of his life.

He never knew witches existed. Never did he expect the witch's love potion would work the way that it did. Then, he thought, maybe it wasn't the witch's love potion, maybe it was him she loved and the love potion had nothing to do with it.

Nah! Before she drank the specially formulated coffee he gave her, she never noticed him, hardly ever looked up at him from her book. Definitely, she never looked at him in the way she does now. Now look at her. She's on her knees sucking his cock. Heather, the luscious librarian is blowing him.

It didn't take him long to explode the lust he had for her in her mouth. She took all he had to give her, swallowed, and licked his cock clean.

"Oh, my God, Heather, that blowjob was the most incredible thing that ever happened to me in my life."

"I'm glad so you enjoyed it, Ritchie," she said. "I loved sucking your cock. You have a beautiful penis."

Then, when she stood to meet his lips again, he kissed her, French kissed her. They made out like horny teenagers at a drive-in. She ushered him to the bedroom and now he had access to her luscious breasts. He was all over them. She had beautiful knockers that were so very firm. With his hands under her sweater and beneath her bra, she moved away from him to remove her sweater and bra.

She had beautiful breasts. Only, it was obvious, once he saw them, that they were implants, but he didn't care. They were perfect, just like her. Finally, he had the perfect woman and she was in love with him and he was just as quickly falling in love with her.

He sucked her perfectly symmetrical breasts. He never figured her for having implants but what did it matter, tits were tits. He was falling in love with Heather. Only, he had a long way to go to catch up to where she was, as she was already in love with him.

"Wait, Ritchie, there's something I must tell you before we continue," she said.

He imagined she was going to tell him that she was a single Mom, but that was okay with him. He loved kids. Besides, she was so good looking and now having these perfect breasts, what could she possibly say to him to ruin this perfect day.

Maybe she has a twin. That would be okay, too. He loved twins, especially if her twin looked exactly like her. Maybe she was going to tell him that her mother lived with her. What did it matter, the more the merrier. Surely, there was nothing that she could tell him that could possibly ruin this moment.

Maybe she was going to tell him that she has her period or that he needs to use a condom. Then, he worried, what if what she has to tell him is more serious than that. What if she has Herpes? It's okay. It doesn't matter. If she has Herpes, then he'll wear a condom or he'll have Herpes, too. She's too perfect to reject just because she has a sexually transmitted disease. There's nothing, nothing that she could possibly say to him to dissuade him from being with her.

"Tell me, Heather, whatever it is we can it's not going to--"

"I'm a pre-op transsexual."

He couldn't believe it. He was in shock. Did she say what he thought she just said?

"What?"

"I'm a woman trapped in a man's body."

He couldn't believe it. She's a man, but she's a woman inside.

"A woman trapped in a man's body?" He was struggling to understand what that meant exactly and then he realized. "You mean you have a penis?"

"Yes."

She has a cock. He couldn't believe it.

"Are you kidding me?"

"No," said Heather. "I love you."

He thought of Chad's warning. Be careful what you wish for because now, he had fallen for Heather or Henry, which was his real birth name and now he was stuck with her or him.

Ritchie returned to Isadora's house that evening.

"You're back. What brings you back," she said.

"I figured you know. Didn't you see it in your crystal ball."

"I did," she said with a laugh. "Didn't I tell you that you were queer, sorry, gay?"

"Just give me the God damn love potion. Okay?"

He handed her his three hundred dollars and she gave him another love potion. He brought it home to where he was invited to live now with Heather and as soon as he opened the front door and saw Heather waiting for him and so happy to see him, he drank it, all of it, every drop.

He waited for the potion to take effect and it did. Suddenly, he saw Heather or Henry, whatever was her or his name, in a whole new light. He was in love with her or him.