By the Bay Ch. 12

Jay whistled to himself as he headed to the kitchen, giving Anita's dog a mock growl when he saw it watching him warily out of the corner of its eyes. It had tucked itself in a corner of the room, and Jay left it alone as he helped himself to a handful of tin biscuits.

He was munching on the second one, wondering where in hell Anita was -- she hadn't been where he'd left her -- when he heard the rear gate give a loud squeak. He pushed the curtain above the sink aside to see Anita dashing across the backyard.

It was just a hunch that made him feel that something wasn't quite right. Frowning, he pushed away from the sink and made for the servant's quarters. He caught her just as she was about to enter her room. Immediate concern rode high on his mind when he noticed that her cheeks were tear-streaked and that her eyes were red from crying. He wanted to ask her what was wrong, but she pushed away from him and turned away with a hitch of her breath. When she shut the door behind her, he could hear her soft sobs from where he stood, with his hand hovering uncertainly over the doorknob.

It was a shock when he felt something wild and untamed take over his body. If someone had deliberately hurt her, he was going to drag them through hell.

*

He managed to give her an hour. He simply couldn't leave her be. It nibbled at his conscience, bit at his soul and completely swallowed all other thought. He sat at the kitchen table -- tapping out an impatient rhythm on the hardwood -- for the first five minutes. Then he paced the floors for the other fifty-five minutes before he couldn't live with the nervous energy and rapped lightly on her door.

There was no response. He hadn't expected any. He pushed the door in slightly and peered into the room. She was seated with her legs crossed on the bed, staring into mid-air. Even as he entered the room, she didn't acknowledge his presence. He sat on the edge of her bed and laid his palm over her hand. She jerked in his grasp, and something rolled to the floor.

He bent to retrieve it; a little blue box. It took only an instant for him to guess what would be inside it. Shards of ice pierced his skin.

When he looked up, she was staring at him with grief visible in her eyes.

"Did you say yes?" The question nearly lodged himself in his throat, but he needed to ask it. It wouldn't be right if he didn't.

She shook her head slowly.

His relief was so immense that it made him feel almost weak. He gathered her in his arms and held her closely, tightly, until she began to squirm. But she didn't protest, merely burrowed into his comforting warmth and scent.

It was quite a while later when she finally spoke.

"He wanted to marry me. Despite everything, he wanted me marry me, Jay."

He didn't bother asking who she was referring to. His fingers stroked her hair gingerly. "I'm glad you didn't say yes."

"I couldn't. If he'd asked me years ago, I might have said yes. But now... I just couldn't."

He ran a hand over her wet cheek.

"I dreamt of marrying him once. Having a husband to myself and a houseful of children."

"When did that dream change?"

Her eyes rose to his, but they weren't filled with contempt as he thought they would be. She didn't accuse him of ruining her future, as Meera had put it, but gave him a small smile instead.

"When he got married to another woman. Now I'm content with what I have," she said, then pressed a lingering kiss to his heart.

He repressed a shudder that her kiss caused before he held her again.

She told him what had happened with Sami. She knew he became angry because he held himself rigid for the most part of her speech, but she assured him that Sami had not harmed her, soothing him until the tension drained out of his body. Then he pulled her up, wrapped her hands around his neck and simply kissed her for the longest time.

*

Two days, he'd told her. Only two days before the first ship for England sets sail. Without much hesitation, she'd told him she'd like to be on it.

The interlude with Sami held her spirits down. She thought of him constantly, hating herself for the grief she'd caused him. He was such a wonderful man, and he'd told her he loved her. He would treat her very well if only she'd said yes.

Anita sighed as she washed the dinner plates. It was pointless thinking about Sami. In the end, she'd never agree to marry him because he was already married to a perfectly lovely wife. She didn't have the selfishness necessary to break up a family.

There might be another reason as to why she didn't want to marry Sami, but she didn't dare think about it. To do so would be to make herself extremely vulnerable to matters of the heart, and she didn't need the extra emotional grief over the one she was experiencing already.

"What are you sighing about?" Nanthini, who was drying plates beside her, asked.

Anita looked up from her washing, staring at the other maid. Her expression was curious, but there was a subtle hint of something else in her voice -- hope, perhaps? Was she hoping to glean a bit of information to gossip amongst her friends? Anita sighed again.

"Nothing," she replied, handing the last clean plate to the older woman.

"Well, if you'd like to talk to someone, I'm always here."

I'm sure you are, Anita thought to herself, but thanked the woman instead.

Later that night, after the house was locked up and quiet, Anita sat in the small tub, letting the warm water soothe her. The clean scent of soap floated around her, drugging her senses.

He didn't knock, but she knew he was there. She wanted him to be there. He wrapped her in her threadbare towel and carried her to her room, shutting the door behind him. She didn't allow him to leave her as he set her down on the bed, pressing her lips to his before he could move away. Her fingers rose to fiddle impatiently with the buttons on his shirt, but he caught her fingers and pinned both her hands over her head as he had his way with her.

It was a passionate, quiet loving. Anita felt his every touch, every kiss so keenly that nothing escaped her but quick, breezy sighs and breathy pleas. Jay, on the other hand, didn't say a word, but was driven heavily by her response. His fingers were gentle, almost loving, but underlying all that was desperation. His fingers trembled slightly, but it was dark and Anita didn't notice. He almost lost her today, he thought, kissing her navel. He'd almost lost her to another man.

Anita sighed as he kissed the inner skin of her thighs, making her sensitive skin break out in little pinpricks. Her fingers tangled in his hair as he made himself comfortable between her legs.

I'm not letting you go, Jay vowed as desire pulsed through his body at the sight of her femininity, wet and ready for him. He placed a light kiss on the sensitive nub at the juncture of her thighs and she tilted her hips towards his mouth for more. Oh yes, he vowed again. He was not going to give her up for a long, long while.

*

The next afternoon as Anita was washing the dirty plates from lunch, Meera came through the backdoor, her hands loaded with a large wooden trunk. The trunk was obviously heavy, for Meera took mincing steps as she walked across the backyard. Anita quickly rinsed her hands in the clean water before rushing to the back door to help her sister.

"No, no, I'm fine," Meera protested when Anita wanted to take the weight off Meera's hands. "I've carried it this far. What's a few more steps?"

Reluctantly, Anita let go and Meera walked the few steps to her bedroom and set the trunk on the floor by the bed. Then she let out a loud groan and rubbed the base of her back. Anita clucked her tongue, watching her sister. She could have hurt herself carrying such heavy things.

"Well, aren't you going to ask what's inside it?" Meera asked after her sister had finished her worrywart's speech. She was too excited by her find to pay much attention to her sister's worries.

Anita rolled her eyes at her sister. Meera would never learn that her safety came first before anything else. She sighed. "What is it?" she asked dutifully.

Meera's smile was gleeful as she knelt and opened the lid on the chest. She pulled a garment out of it and exclaimed, "Clothes, 'ka! To wear in England!"

Anita knelt next to her sister. She reached in and pulled out a pretty blue dress. "Where did you get this? Did you buy it?"

Meera laughed as she rifled through the clothes in the trunk. "I went down to the port today and found these at an unbelievably low price. It's a good thing I saved all the shillings you gave me. This is a wonderful purchase! And the trunk was free!"

Anita pulled out a white dress and frowned at the length of it. "The dress is too short, Meera. Neither of us will be able to wear it."

Meera took the dress from her sister and laid it against her body. "It's the fashion these days, 'ka. The dress is meant to be short."

Anita's eyes widened. "That's indecent!"

Meera laughed at her sister's expression. "I'm not asking you to wear them. There are a few full skirts in here that I'm sure you'd like, though."

Anita took the dress back from her sister. "You're not going to wear this dress too, Meera. Your legs can be seen! It's obscene."

Meera shrugged. "That's all right. I have nice legs."

Anita frowned. "Meera. I'm not comfortable with you wearing things like this."

Meera groaned, snatched the dress back from her sister and stuffed it into the trunk. "Fine," she grumbled. "But if it's the fashion in England, I'm going to wear it too. It's not indecent if others are wearing it too."

Anita conceded. "I guess when you're one in many you won't stand out."

Meera pulled a tan skirt out of the trunk, followed by a collared white blouse. She handed it to her sister. "Here. You might like this."

Anita took the clothes from her sister and laid it against herself. Indeed, she did like it. The skirt was long and reached her ankles and the blouse was equally proper.

"Go ahead. Try it on," Meera urged, giving her sister her back.

Anita quickly slipped out of her maid's dress and slipped into the skirt, feeling the smooth material gliding over her skin. It was a pleasant feeling, for her skin was only used to coarse cotton.

Then she slipped the blouse over her head, letting the sleeves fall over her wrists. "How's this?" she asked Meera.

Her sister turned, and Anita knew from her expression that she was stifling laughter. "What?" Anita asked defensively, running a hand over her attire.

"Here," Meera said, standing to help her sister. She folded the blouse and tucked it into the skirt so that it didn't hang out loosely, then folded the sleeves a few times. When she stepped back, Anita looked more presentable than before. "That's better."

Anita looked down at herself, wishing they had a large mirror so she could look at herself. The clothes were definitely comfortable, especially since the skirt had a short slit in the side so she could walk properly.

"My turn," Meera announced, and Anita turned so that her sister could have some privacy.

When Meera was done, Anita turned to find her sister wearing an attire similar to hers, only the skirt was a lot shorter. It was a black pleated skirt that Meera wore with a light yellow blouse with puffy sleeves.

"The skirt is too short," was she first thing Anita said. Meera rolled her eyes and waved her sister's comment away. They were only in the house after all.

"I just wish we had a mirror to look at ourselves," Meera grumbled as she tried to get a look at her attire through the small hand-held mirror in the room.

"Yes, I wish..." Anita started saying, then her eyes lit up. She grabbed her sister's hand and pulled her through the house and up the stairs. She knew Jay would be in the study at this time of the day and she also knew he wouldn't mind if they used his mirror for a while.

When they stood in front of the large mirror in Jay's room, Anita let out a loud gasp. The clothes looked wonderful on them! Especially Meera, because the shade of gold accentuated her hair.

They stood in front of the mirror for a long while, turning this way and that just to see how they looked in the new clothes. Then when the excitement wore off, they ran downstairs to change into something new and began the ritual again.

They did this for an hour until Anita announced that she couldn't put off her chores any longer. Meera nodded, understanding, then promptly informed her that there were only 24 hours left before they departed the island. Meera's excitement proved contagious, for when Anita returned to her chores, she found herself smiling and thinking about England.

*

Later that night, Anita trembled as Jay withdrew from her body and pulled her close to his side. She let out a contented sigh, her muscles still deliciously lax from her climax. Jay ragged breath teased her ear; he always took a little longer than she did to recover from their coupling.

She ran her index finger around his tight nipple, fascinated by its texture. Jay never allowed her to play with his body as much as he played with hers... but that was probably because she hadn't volunteered to do so. And knowing Jay, he wouldn't ask her if he thought she wouldn't be comfortable with it.

As her nail deliberately scraped the tip of the pink nub, he reached up quickly to capture her hand. She giggled. "What, milord? Are you sensitive?" she teased.

He raised the hand he held captive and placed a kiss on it. "Only when it's you touching me."

She smiled as she settled herself against his chest. The man was too much of a charmer for his own good. It was no wonder that she was so attracted to him.

"Are you all packed for tomorrow?" Jay asked her as he fiddled with a strand of her dark hair. The glow from the lamp lent it a shine that mesmerized him.

She nodded against his chest. "There wasn't much to pack anyway," she added.

"When we get back from the trip, I'm sure you'll be complaining that you have too much to pack," he jested.

She glanced up at him. "Jay, I don't want you to spend-."

"Nonsense," he cut her off. "I'll spend on whatever I want to."

"No, Jay-."

"Hush now. There's no use arguing over this. I'll win in the end."

"What an arrogant thing to say," she commented, though a smile flirted with her lips.

"It's the truth, sweetheart," he stated and leaned in for a kiss.

When he pulled away, she said, "It seems like you haven't packed, though." His traveling bag still lay deflated on top of the cupboard.

He shook his head. "It won't take me long. Five minutes would do. It's a skill I learnt in the army."

"Mm," murmured, idly tracing the dragon tattoo on his body. Gods, she felt like nibbling on him; his body was so irresistible to her.

Moments ticked by and they lay in bed caressing each other. The next time Anita spoke was almost in a whisper. "Jay, do you realize that this will be the last time in a while that we'll be sharing this bed?"

Sated green eyes rose to connect with hers and he gave her a crooked smile. "We'll be christening a lot more beds to come, sweetheart."

She rapped him lightly on the chest. "That's not what I meant. Aren't you ever frightened about the future? The uncertainty of it all?"

His features turned thoughtful before he shook his head. "Not quite. I prefer to live for the now than to worry about the future."

"Oh."

He fingers rose to stroke her cheek. "But I know you worry, and that's enough for us both, not to mention your sister as well."

She gave him a disgruntled look. "Don't tease me," she chided. "I can't help worrying."

"I know. I think it's cute."

She raised an eyebrow.

"No one has ever really worried about me before. It's nice to know someone does," he said in lieu of an explanation. She smiled, then promptly tried to stifle a yawn. Jay reached over to turn down the lamp. She pulled the blanket over both of them.

"Tomorrow will be a new beginning, Jay," she whispered into the darkness. "I want everything to turn out well."

"I'll make sure it will," he promised her, sealing it with a light kiss to her lips. He fell asleep promptly after that, but she remained awake, unable to sleep without knowing what tomorrow would bring.

*

It was a day of firsts for her. She rode her first hackney, set foot on her first steamship. It was also the time she'd ever stepped into the Chinese people's land. The whole island was divided by the races; land allocated to the Indians, Chinese, Foreigners and the indigenous people. She'd heard that the founder had done so to avoid clashes between the races if they all lived separately.

The hackney had to pass through the Chinese land to get to the port, and the whole village had her rapt attention for the ten minutes it took to cross the area. The Chinese village was so much different from the Indian village. Some of the Chinese were considerably wealthy, judging from their houses, and they favored a lot of red. There were also poor Chinese, though, and they lived in small kampong houses like the one her mother had owned.

But what enchanted her most were their temples. Their temples were magnificent! The design could rival the Hindu temples, with the dragons draped over the roof like protectors. She would have given anything to visit one if only she wouldn't be stared at so much.

All through the ride, Anita kept up a steady stream of chatter directed at Jay, who kept his amused silence as she described their surroundings to him... surroundings that he, too, could see. But watching her was addictive, as always. He didn't mind her chatter as long as he could see the excitement and awe that made her eyes the clearest blue.

Meera, on the other hand, occupied the seat opposite them and was busy writing in her notebook with a pencil that was no bigger than her pinky finger. She was in her own world, it seemed, and oblivious even to her sister's fascination. Jay found himself wondering what she was writing so raptly, but remembered Anita's warning: never peek at Meera's notebook. Since he had a brief idea of what she would do to him if he did, he sat back in his seat and concentrated on making sure Anita didn't jump out the hack in her excitement.

When they exited the Chinese village, Anita finally settled back in her seat. Her cheeks were flushed and she looked just as she did after they made love. His hands itched to pull her close, but he knew she didn't like him doing that with her sister around. So he sighed and tipped his head back to stare at the ceiling. They were still a few minutes from the port.

It was a pleasant shock to feel her hands squirm under his to entwine their fingers. He glanced at her, and she lowered her head shyly; if she were fairer, a blush would have been high on her cheeks.

When she finally looked up at him, he tilted his head at her, silently asking what she was up to. She shrugged and leaned close to him, placing a kiss on his arm.

He leaned down to whisper in her ear, "I thought we weren't supposed to be intimate in front of your sister?"

"She's not paying attention," she whispered back.

But that wasn't true. Meera was more aware of the two of them than they realized. She just pretended not to be. It always made her sad to see her sister so happy; her own loss still weighed heavily in her mind. When she was in England, she vowed to find a way to get over Rae. Perhaps a new place would change her feelings.

She returned to her diary. It was a new journal she'd started only this morning. She was determined to pen down every thought that crossed her mind on the journey... for memory's sake. When she was old, she wanted to reflect on her first adventure. And what better way to do so than to write everything down?

Today would be a new beginning, her sister had told her first thing in the morning. Meera hoped fervently that it would be such.