Carol's Patch Job Ch. 01byCastleStone©
Jim Bellows felt like complete shit. The Customs and Immigration people had taken one look at him and just waved him through. Later they would get into trouble for not calling the health department.
"Where the hell is she? She knows what time my plane was to arrive and she isn't even answering her cell phone!" Jim thought to himself. He didn't want to do it, but he was going to call Carol his seventeen year old daughter and ask her to pick him up. The airport was a nightmare to drive into and he didn't like having to ask her to do it, but he felt so bad that he didn't trust himself to a taxi ride.
"Carol, honey I'm at the airport, International arrivals, and I can't reach your Mom. I'm feeling a bit sick and I was hoping you could come pick me up? If it is too much trouble I can take a taxi."
"Daddy, you sound terrible what's wrong?"
"It's not too bad Baby, but I could use a ride home."
"No trouble, I've got Steve with me and he can come in and get you and I can wait with the car in the loading area. It will be real quick, no trouble, we will be there in a half an hour. You stay in the building and keep warm. We will be there Daddy, don't worry. I've been to the airport before, picking up friends."
"Thanks Baby, love you."
"Love you to Daddy, bye."
Jim hung up his cell phone. He was a bit mad at his daughter and relieved at the same time. There were specific areas that she wasn't supposed to drive to, because he thought they were too tough for a novice driver, the airport being one of them but it was good to know that she had been here before and she should be okay.
"Steve!" she yelled at her brother "We've got to go right now, Dad is in trouble" Carol and Steve were out shopping for a birthday present for their Father. Their Dad was a self-sacrificing man for his family. His children felt it was too much so. Not that he was a soft touch when it came to discipline but any extra time or money he had was for his family first, second, third, fourth and fifth. They figured he put himself about sixth. Jim would scrimp and save. Almost always he would take a bag lunch to work and he was driving a ten year old minivan. Whereas his wife and daughter both had cars only a year old with low mileage. He figured that he wanted them in something safe and reliable. If his minivan broke down, well he had plenty of tools in the back and could normally get it chugging along, again.
Steve heard the panic in his older sister's voice and came running from the food court in the mall. "What's wrong Carol?"
"Dad's sick and stuck at the airport. We've got to go get him, he sounds really bad and out of it! " Jim had a peculiar reaction to extreme illness, he would hallucinate and generally act as if he was extremely drunk. He hated it and often said that, that was the worse part of being sick.
"I heard Mom on the phone last night, she knows what time he was to get in!" growled Steve "Have you tried her cell phone"
"I just did and it went straight to voice mail." Steve's and Carol's Mother, Janice, had a bad habit of ignoring her cell phone and turning it off. She was more than a bit of hypocrite in this matter, because she would raise hell with her kids and husband, if they were even a bit slow in answering her calls to them.
Carol and Steve were a small bit concerned that something might be wrong with their Mother, but it was sad to say that it was sort of typical of her. Though she had never before blown off picking up her husband at the airport before. If Jim could be described as self sacrificing, Janice could be described as selfish and self-absorbed. Jim frequently defended his wife with his children, saying it was too much of the neighborhood gossip mongers that had changed their Mother in the last six years or so.
A half an hour later, they were at the airport and as was typical of their Father, he was waiting outside for them, so he wouldn't inconvenience them too much. Carol quickly stopped the car and both her and Steve came running up.
"Daddy what are you doing outside?" scolded Carol
Jim didn't seem to notice his children and was just huddled up on a bench, shivering, staring blankly into space.
"Dad!" yelled Steve with a note of panic in his voice.
"Oh, Carol, Steve you got here so quick it's only been five minutes." responded Jim
Carol grabbed her Father's arm and helped him to the car while Steve carried his Father's heavy suitcases. Carol was very concerned with how violently her Father was shivering and his teeth were chattering.
Once he was in the car, Carol directed all the heat vents her Father's way, but he was still shivering violently. Steve, reaching from the back seat, felt his Father's forehead.
"Sis, Dad's burning up, maybe we should take him to the hospital?"
"Daddy" queried Carol "Should we take you to the doctor?"
"I just want to go home baby, but I'm so cold; could you turn up the heat?" Now Carol and Steve, with their heavy winter clothes, were sweating in the car because of the heat.
"I'm sorry Daddy, the heater is on full blast."
"Oh, it must be broken. I'll take your car into the dealership, next week. The car is still under warranty." Responded Jim. With that, Carol's Father seemed to return to his daze, huddling back into the front passenger seat, with his physical misery plain to see.
Forty minutes later they arrived home. Carol pulled into the driveway and helped her Father out of the car and towards the front door of their house, while Steve got the luggage.
Just outside the front door, was one of the neighbor ladies. She seemed to be shocked to see them, her eyes were big and her mouth a bit open. In her hands she was carrying a store bought coffee cake.
"Hello Shemp" greeted Carol's Father to the woman and Carol had to hide her grin. Her Father privately called her mother's three neighborhood friends the Three Stooges. Steve thought it was an insult to the Stooges, those icons of slapstick, to compare the ladies to them. So he privately called the ladies the Three Witches. Carol, thought it an insult to witches and changed the "W" to a "B".
The woman in question, real name Nancy, got a puzzled look on her face at being hailed as Shemp.
"What is going on and what is your Father doing home?
"We had to pick him up at the airport, Mother forgot, he's very sick and we need to get him inside."
Nancy being helpful, opened up the screen door, and then opened up the house door. After opening up the house door she called inside "I'm back" and stepped back outside to hold the screen door open for Carol, who had her hands full helping her Father.
Carol stepped into the house helping her Father. While helping her Father through the vestibule and into the main part of the house. She heard her mother say "Marge, I can't believe how big your little brother is and it felt fantastic. I swear he is at least this big." When Carol stepped around the short vestibule wall she saw her Mother holding her hands about ten inches apart.
Carol's mother, Janice, looked up at the shuffling foot steps and was shocked to see Carol, with a furious expression on her face, and her husband Jim.
"Carol, Jim what are you doing home?" came out a flabbergasted question.
Carol was too busy helping her Father to a chair to give an immediate reply, once he stepped into the warm house his strength had seemed to give out and Carol was straining to set him down lightly.
"Jim, answer my question!" Demanded Janice.
Carol incensed at her Mother's behavior replied. "Daddy called us from the airport, because you forgot to pick him up and he was too sick for a taxi. Now, I know why you forgot to pick him up! Just how big was Marge's brother!" Screamed Carol.
The room got suddenly silent and Janice got red faced and looked at the floor.
Steve came bungling into the room with the heavy luggage, wondering why it was so quiet.
"Steve can you take Daddy's suitcases upstairs and bring down the thermometer?" asked Carol
With Steve trundling upstairs, Carol put her arms around her Father to stop his shivering and give him some warmth.
"Huh, what is it baby, are we home already?"
"Daddy, what do you think of adultery?" asked Carol while glaring at her Mother.
Jim, being thoroughly out of it, didn't hesitate and just answered the question.
"Adultery, adultery is a terrible thing, betraying sacred vows, betraying a sacred union. It is a betrayal against both partners of the marriage, even the adulterer; as well as betrayal against the wronged spouse and most seriously against the children of the marriage, since it destroys the marriage. Your mother and I were married in the Church and would never betray our vows." wheezed Jim
"Daddy, can adultery ever be forgiven?" Asked Carol while still glaring at her Mother.
"Kitten it would never happen to me, I trust your Mother, but I could possibly forgive one or two beddings with a lone man. One might be an accident of too much to drink or the like. Two might be a stupid mistake. But three or more is a pattern and not to be forgiven. When a wife commits adultery it is terribly hard on a man, especially a no longer young man, like me. A loss in confidence for us, makes it damn hard to perform. "
"Well there is always Viagra." Quipped Mary, the last of the Three Bitches.
Janice, Marge and Nancy all turned to glare at Mary for the stupid comment.
"Viagra, Viagra! I wish the stuff worked for me, all it gives me is ferocious headaches! I've tried it twice." wheezed Jim
Jim's wife Janice looked up in shock.
"Most guys up to about the age of thirty-six, have no problems performing. After that age, we need a bit of encouragement. We need reminders that our spouses see as sexual creatures to keep the old magic in the marriage. We can buy our spouses sexy lingerie, we can try new things with our mates, buy flowers, and jewelry to remind them that they are more than a housemate to us. But if they never wear the lingerie, constantly say no to new things and will only have sex in the missionary position. Treating sex as more a chore than an expression of love and passion, then it gets awful hard to perform. Especially if the pus, oops sorry young ears, if the vagina is bit too loose. There is no stimulation to keep the man erect. Men are given just so much to work with, but I understand from reading on the internet, that women have the option of a few different exercises to keep things tight."
The adult women in the room were looking at Jim in shock after his exposition. Carol was staring at her Father with a mixture of shock and glee. While Steve was thinking "TOO DAMN MUCH INFORMATION" while he was checking his Father's temperature, first with the ear type thermometer. Then because he didn't believe the reading and didn't trust the thermometer, he used the oral type thermometer, ONCE HIS FATHER SHUT UP.
At that point Marge's cell phone rang. "Hello" ........ "Oh, hello Mister Henderson" ............ "Wait you say your filming them, right now? .............. "That's impossible, Jim Bellows is sitting across from me right now in his own home." .............. "Mister Henderson, I suggest you get your facts straight!" With that Marge ended her call.
Janice was staring at Marge through the entire conversation, a sorrowful expression coming to dominate her face.
Marge turned to speak to Janice, she spoke very carefully and quietly as possible, but it was still audible to Carol. "That was the P. , a Mr. Henderson on the phone, he said that he was filming Jim and Miss X right now."
With that Janice put her face in her hands and started to sob.
"Carol" Steve shouted in panic, he didn't call for his Mother but his Sis.
"Dad's temperature is almost 106."
The end of part one. More parts to follow even if you don't like this one, I think I'm a masochist. On second thought I'm married, I must be a masochist.