All Comments on 'Carry That Weight'

I fear though, that too many readers will not have fully understood the psychology behind his later actions, until (or unless) they read the comments. And even then, it will go completely over some of their heads.

I thought this was an intelligent tale, well written (as to be expected from HDK), with a pretty clever ending. But I write as well, so maybe I think a little more about what I’m reading.

Often a writer one doesn’t say some things in the actually tale, because he/she actually wants the readers to think about them. In fact the writer hopes they wont think about them until they realise that they damn well should have done.

One has to ask oneself, why our hero suddenly decided that he wouldn’t get pie-eyed on that particular evening.

And Debra and Wayne, as an author HDK has to use all kinds of characters in his tales; as do all of us do, who write. Indeed often some dumb, and some who you might describe as wimps. If in every tale, the main character was an alert no-nonsense, six-foot-six, ex-US-Navy Seal type who reacted to just about everything by breaking somebody's head. Now, wouldn’t that make for varied reading on this, and every other Site?

As for JPB, he is a very good writer and I’m completely sure you have no idea what his body of work is really all about. But whether I like his tales content or not, I get a lot of fun out of reading his stories. And I’m sure that I’m not the only writer who has it sussed by now.

Sorry to mention JPB here HDK but others had already introduced him.

lives. Marijauna has never been responsible for all the unhappiness that alcohol brings. Why is it legal when pot isn't. Just answer me that nyminus

HDK,

I always like your stories. You have a great sense of humor. What I like about this story is the irony and depth of it. He loves her and doesn't want to end his family, but he KNOWS that he will never love her like he did and he KNOWS that she didn't accidently do this. He KNOWS an excellent way to extract revenge from both of them and he does it. And while his W suspects what his goal is, she doesn't KNOW what the future brings. Which in itself is even more revenge. Actually a very cold story, told by a guy who usually puts a laugh or two into to one.

You are a very good writer.

Good story! This guy's definitely no wimp. He carries retribution to it's highest ... with guilt. Now, let's see if she can truly win him back.

You worked out the theme stated in the title. I kind of wish that you spent more time on the story, because it seems clear that this has been going on for twenty years and that his wife was not on a one-time hook-up. Jeff had been putting him to sleep to what purpose other than this? They are guilty of setting him up and Amber deserves to know about her husband. One other question would be why did he go to sleep if he knew something was up.

Calling some one a wimp after he saves two women, kills a would be

rapist and calls into play the community seems a bit strange. You have to have tunnel vision to label so easily... I am curious what they would feel would be the only correct action? Certainly avoiding harm to the children would sound to me as the correct reaction, but that requires slow action and careful planning. Not something the wimp sayers would have the patience for...

What a hero and a wimp in the same day.

Yes I would like to see how you make this turn out.

Jeff planned that shit from the start. Was Ashley in on it from the beginning?

How long has it been gooing on despite their claims.

What kind of "friend" fucks his best friends wife and plans it?

There is no respect for Tom at all from Jeff. It would be best to to deal with him in a very harsh manner ie: Make him spend some time in the ER. I would also make sure his wife and family know what the fuck he did.

And that relationship would be severed forever.

As for for Ashley it would be easy to kick her to the curb. But Love and relationships are not that cut and dried. They are very tricky when waded into this abyss. Will she do as she has said? Or will she give after up after a time and ask for a divorce?

If love is still present it will obviously take many years to fix this kind of damage. Do they have it in them? Most don't.

It would be interesting to see where you HDK takes it and what kind of twists you can weave into this story to make it interesting.

Thanks for writing!

Sorry but if the husband truly believed that the wife was having multiple affairs and that she and Jeff set him up, thne they really do not have a marriage anymore. A second chapter where we find out what happened in say 3 years time would be good. Doe sthe husband stay in aloveless marriage? or Doe sthe wife stay in a loveless marriage and find someone else. But as always a well written story

...stupid guy! He knew Jeff was up to something and then when he found his wife in bed with him...who is kidding who, she went willingly and it was planned.

Okay, his sense of decency kept him from killing Jeff ( a husband and a father with children), killing his wife (mother of his), probably should have pulled the trigger on himself.

Well, now he has planted guilt, hurt, sadness, adultery and infidelity on them and decided they should go on in worry knowing they have low moral character.

Here's the problem, she didn't respect him enough to not sleep with Jeff, in fact - could probably been part of the plan to get him drunk. So...an Epilogu or dragged out second chapter could depict that after a while of guilt depression by his wife, He realizes that she did not have enough respect for him to remain faithful and one day he shows up at the house with a process server,a court order for restraining purposes, a moving van, helpers to pack and has his wife served...Divorce!!! Does he still love her...No, the woman he marrid - Yes, she no longer existed and sadly, with tears in his eyes, he would always love her and miss her but she was GONE Forever!

You're a good writer, don't stop BUT - Please, don't leave intelligent, educated men in a heap of humility and despair...let them go!!

As someone else has stated, this trend with a lot of authors on this site in this category have migrated into two camps: a]. total wimp ass male characters who take back their self-center sluts [JPB style] or, b]. the non-plausible psycho-bullshit that allows the slut wife to get away with it again & again. In fact both camps have the slut wife getting away with the cheating with minimal consequences because each male character is portrayed as being complete incapable to dump the slut and find a better replacement. Both of these types of stories & authors really belong on that other fucked up cluck site - dark wanderer. Sorry about the ranting & raving, just wondering where the realistic authors of this genre went. Once again, did not like and will wait for Harry's analysis because it is not worth our time to break down the plot holes issues and illogical character development. HDK - glad to see you submit again but very disappointed in your desire to follow the wimp/cluck trends. Debra & Wayne

HDK story. Howwever, I would love to see how the psychological war he has started turns out. While this story can stand alone as it it is, it has that quality of ending that JPB has become notorious for that leaves the reader with that unresolved feeling of events that cry for a follow up. The indefeniteness of the ending does open the door of the readers imagination and that is certainly fun, but I am in the camp of those who want a follow up. By the way, fitting punishment and revenge, but how long can it last before one of them just gives up.

But it could have been a great one. Imagine if Tom would have told his SIL why he was buying the beer. The emotions , anguish and dialogue would have been fantastic. Oops, sorry I forgot you were HDK.

Nothing is tougher to get over than a good guilt trip. I will give their marriage just enough time till Ashley either takes her life feeling like shit or walks out knowing how much she has messed up her life. Perfect Revenge.