Case of Compound Errors

The man sat at the outer desk, looking at a porn site on a computer. He barely glanced up when she came out.

"Here's the address, honey. Just pretend you are getting fucked up there, the assholes all love that shit."

+++

By the time Sharon had spent a week on the circuit, she was completely numb to being naked in front of people. She came out, did her three songs, each time ending up on her back with her legs as wide as she could get them. She quickly discovered that Oregon laws allowed far more than she ever would have dreamed, the other girls often reached down and spread themselves open, especially if some man was offering particularly large tips.

Very quickly she also became numb to even doing that, and she discovered that if she rubbed her clitoris and made it stand out proudly, they tossed a lot more money up on the stage.

She looked out at the sea of faces, felt nothing at all.

Of course there were offers, but she turned each and every single one down, although she quickly learned to smile and tell them maybe later. The money was actually very good, sometimes she made over $300 in a single 3 hour shift. She also learned quickly to play up to the older men, often then the bill slipped onto the stage was a five, sometimes even a ten.

But she did hate the taverns, the money was far less. She even complained to Norman about that, but he just shrugged.

"Gotta take the good with the bad, babe. I already give you more of the hard bars than most. If I gave you any more, the other girls will get all bitchy on me."

One perk she did get was a driver, Norman saw to that. She never really thought about why he did, she was grateful though.

By the end of a few months she got the house payments caught up. Working until 2 AM each night meant she slept during the day, so she hired a housekeeper and baby sitter full time, and moved her into the spare bedroom.

Her name was Maria, she was barely 25, and on the heavy set side. Sharon's life became settled, a ritual of one day bleeding into the next.

The quiet times when she was home, sitting and holding Beth, or watching her learn to walk, then run kept her mostly sane. The pills the Doctor prescribed for her helped also.

Then one day she came into the living room just in time to hear Beth call Maria "Mommy."

That shocked her.

She told Norman she would only work three days each week, and only two three hour shifts per night.

He threw a fit but she held fast, explaining why. Norman stopped and looked at her, then he nodded.

"OK, babe. Got it, some things is more important."

For a moment, Sharon realized that Norman looked kind. She realized there was more to this harsh sounding man than met the eye.

Money became tighter, but it was enough. Now she could spend more time with Beth. Sharon delighted in that.

+++

The next change came when Norman called her one morning. He asked her to come into his office for a talk. She simply threw on her pullover dress since she seldom wore anything more and drove down to his office.

"Hey!" He said when she walked in. He was puffing on his ever present cigar.

"What's up, Norman?" She asked, sitting down.

"Got a deal for ya, maybe you are interested?"

"What kind of deal?"

"Private show, private party, big bucks." He grinned.

"I don't do the private shows, you know that."

"Ten grand." He grinned.

Sharon blinked at that.

"Ten thousand dollars? Just for a show? Hell, why don't they just come into the club?"

"You know why." He said.

Sharon just looked at him.

"They asked for you." He said.

"Me? Why?"

"Because yer special, is why."

"Norman, those private parties...I know how they go, I don't know if I could do that." She told him.

"These deals come up from time to time, you can make a week's pay in 3 or 4 hours. That would give you lots more time at home, I know ya wanna be with yer kid."

"Sex? With men? Norman, I don't know....?"

"Hey, ya been fucked before, what's the big deal?"

"I...only by my husband, he is..was...." She stopped.

"No shit? Really? Well, I kinda figured that part out from when I first saw you, but you sure don't act that way no more."

"I..I was a...Ryan is the only man I ever..." She suddenly felt a shyness again, it had been a long time since she felt that way.

"Honey, he is dead. Too damn bad too, but life throws shit at ya. Anyway, yer special, I kinda want ya myself." He looked directly at her.

Sharon didn't know what to say.

"I can take good care of ya, I got lots of money. I really do want ya, I wanted ya ever since I saw ya in that parking lot way back."

"Parking lot?" Sharon was confused now.

"Yea, you was wearing that same outfit ya got on right now. I was floored when ya walked in my door later."

"You want me?"

"Yea, I'll give you anything ya want."

"Anything?"

"Yep. Really, just be my woman."

"What about that party? Wouldn't you be...?" Sharon asked.

Norman broke up laughing.

"Hey, it's ten grand! Half for you and half for me, whatever happens washes off." He grinned.

Sharon shrugged, stood up.

"All right." She said, tugging the simple house dress over her head.

+++

Norman didn't last very long, and Sharon didn't care. He was also all done after just one time, she didn't care about that, either. His penis was less than half the size of her husband, she felt nothing but a warmness.

Norman was kind, she actually did like him.

"Not hurting ya, am I babe?" He asked while thrusting away the first time.

"No, it's wonderful." She answered.

She did the party that weekend, there were no other girls there. It had to do with some famous basketball team. She might as well have been painting her toenails, but none of them could tell.

Norman handed her $5000 the next day, sticking the rest into his own account.

Less than a week later, she knocked on a hotel room door, expecting to see several men, music, a party. The man that answered the door was a familiar face, she saw it on the news nearly every single night.

Sharon understood perfectly, she quickly covered her surprise with a sweet smile.

"Hello!" She said, pretending she had no idea at all who he was.

After that, once every two or three days she took care of Norman. She gave him his half, but he spent most of that on things for her. One day a new BMW sat in her driveway, the older Ford she was driving was just gone.

Sharon no longer had to dance, a couple of times each month there were the special parties.

She became completely numb to all of that, she knew the job and all of the tricks by now, no one could tell that she was completely empty inside.

There was just the one light in her life, and that was Beth.

+++

Norman asked her to come and live with him, but she refused. He appeared to be saddened by that, but he understood.

"I love ya, babe. I ain't never felt that or said that to no other woman, but I do love you. I guess if it's just sometimes then that's the was it is. Better than nothing." Norman blinked at her, she saw him struggling with emotion.

She reached out and touched his cheek, then leaned in and kissed him.

"Norman, I like you. But my life is my little girl."

Norman just nodded, lit his ever present cigar, and went back to his office.

+++

Saturday morning many long months later, Sharon was watching the news on cable. The man announcing was the same one she had visited, three times now. Beth was now nearly five years old, she would be starting school the next Fall.

She missed most of the grainy video the first time, at the very end she got a glimpse of some men holding a knife. All of them wore masks and were screaming in some foreign language, huge guns hanging from their shoulders. She was trying to make out the words that scrolled across the bottom of the screen when she glanced up.

The man standing up and screaming had the man he was holding by the hair down on his knees. He reached down and jerked off the blindfold covering the man's eyes.

It was Ryan.

She saw the face, knew at a glance.

She passed out cold.

+++

Sharon's eyes came open, two men and a woman were hovering over her.

"Smart little girl you got there, lady. She called 911, told them her Mommy was sick." He said. Then she felt herself lifted and carried out on a stretcher.

"Beth!" She called out.

"We have her, she is fine. Now you just relax." Someone said. The world faded away.

She opened her eyes again to lights, then finally she managed to focus. She was looking up at a white ceiling.

"How are you feeling?" A nurse appeared almost instantly.

"Beth!" Sharon cried out again.

"Your daughter is just fine, she is here."

"That man, on the TV. I saw that, he is my husband!" She cried out.

"What man?"

"The one those...terrorists have. Ryan Miller!"

"What? The one that is all over the news? Are you sure?"

"Yes! Yes, I am sure. I have to talk to someone!" She struggled to sit up but couldn't.

+++

"Mrs. Miller? Can you hear me?" A voice was saying.

"Yes, I hear you." Sharon opened her eyes, looked around. She had no idea where she was.

"I am Doctor Khalil, you have been here for several weeks. How are you feeling?" He asked.

"Weeks? What are you talking about?"

"You have been hysterical, you wouldn't stop screaming. We have had to keep you medicated."

"Where is Beth? My little girl?"

"She is in foster care, she is fine."

"No! Bring her to me,I want her, I want to see her!" Sharon demanded.

"We don't think that is for the best right now. We need to get you stable."

"What do you mean, stable? I am fine."

"You have been way over medicated for a long time, that piles up on a person. We have your system cleared out now mostly, let's just take things a day at a time and see what happens, OK? You have had a major nervous breakdown, it was life threatening there for a while."

"My husband! Did they kill him?"

"No. There are some men coming to speak with you, I will call them. They asked me to call as soon as you were alert. I will go do that now." He smiled, patted her on the shoulder and left.

A nurse came in a few minutes later.

"Visitor for you, honey. He has been here every single day. I will send him in."

Sharon looked up as Norman walked though the door.

"How ya doing, babe?" He asked.

"All right, I guess."

"I heard."

"Heard what?"

"Yer old man, they got him loose. Guess that was a hell of a fight." Norman looked sad.

"They did? He is all right?"

"Yea, shot to shit and all banged up but still alive I guess. They got him someplace down in Texas. All over the news, it's all they wanna talk about. Guess yer guy is one hell of a hero, he jumped on one of his buddies there when all hell broke loose, saved his life. Then even with his legs all fucked up he got a gun away from one of them bastards and killed him and two others. Hey, are you gonna go back to him?"

"I don't know. If he..wants me, I just don't know."

"Well, I figured that. But I do love ya, babe. Ya do what ya want but if ya want to, I will always take care of you! Even if you don't really...." His voice trailed off.

"Norman, we...that life..it isn't me."

"Yea, I know. Yer a classy babe and I am just a guy. I wish to fuck I was born good looking with a big root but a guy gets what he gets. Still, if things don't...I will always be there for ya, no matter what..." Norman stopped, he got a tear in his eye. Then he stood up, leaned down and kissed her, and quickly left.

+++

That afternoon two men in suits came by. They explained that Ryan had been held for a very long time by a crazy sounding fraction group. When the American military began to take apart their last stronghold, they had produced Ryan as a last gasp effort, threatening to publicly kill him.

That didn't work, some special forces went in since they were dealing with one of their own. Ryan had been freed, but he was badly hurt in the fight.

+++

Sharon listened carefully. Her husband Ryan was a National hero, she had missed all of that while under sedation.

"They told me he was dead." She said finally.

"The vehicle he was in was totally destroyed, everyone was killed. It was so bad they had troubles even identifying anyone, but now we know your husband was on top manning a gun. He was blown clear and captured."

"But...they wear dog tags, there is DNA?"

"Hot zone, Mrs. Miller. It was a long time before we managed to get to the site, there wasn't much left. Until that broadcast, we had no idea."

"When can I see him?"

"He is in Texas, they have him on an induced coma at the military hospital there."

"How badly is he hurt?" She asked, her mind now felt clear.

"When they took down the building, he was inside. Somehow he survived that, probably because of the brick cell they held him in. Then he fought, holding them off until the Special Forces got in and cleared the situation."

The man's eyes went sad, he hesitated.

"He lost both of his legs. Friendly fire. I am sorry about that." He added.

Sharon put her face in her hands and sobbed.

+++

Beth held Sharon's hand as they stood in line waiting for the airplane to board. Several very large men in uniform held back the army of reporters and cameramen. Sharon was dressed as nicely and conservatively as she could be, the media had already discovered her dancing profession and had a field day with that.

What they had not yet discovered was the rest.

She turned down every single request for the talk shows. Some of them offered a lot of money, but all she wanted to do was go back to her life, back with her man. She had gotten updates while she was still in the hospital herself, Ryan was stirring, the swelling was going down.

He could wake up at any time. They would be at his side in just hours, where she and Beth belonged.

There was a single military guard assigned to Ryan's door, that surprised Sharon. She went to his hospital room every single day, the man never spoke, only nodded. She did notice he was armed, and watched everyone carefully.

She expected more media attention but life goes on, other stories crop up and finally the calls all stopped. Then the guard was also gone, life was becoming calm again.

+++

It was over a dozen impossibly long weeks before Ryan opened his eyes. Sharon had spent every moment that they would allow by his side, talking to him.

He looked around in confusion at first, then his eyes settled on her and he smiled.

"Hi, honey." He said.

"Hi." She answered, taking his hand in hers.

"Where the hell are we?" He asked.

"In a hospital. In Texas."

"Sure beats that last place." He mumbled, then went back to sleep.

+++

More days became weeks, weeks bled into Months. Sharon walked with him daily, pushing the wheelchair along. Then he was fitted with legs, he managed a couple of steps before falling over. But he got right back up and fell down again. A third time, he stubbornly got right back up, managing to stay upright that time.

By the end of another week, he was walking the hallways and holding her hand. One afternoon, a nurse came in and asked her to leave, because she was going to give Ryan a bed bath. That had happened many times before.

"Say, do you mind if I do that?" Sharon asked.

"I am sorry, we can't allow...." Then it hit her, and she grinned.

"Sure, honey. I will watch the door." She first drew the curtains, then went outside and shut the door.

Some parts of Ryan had stayed exactly the same.

+++

Sharon went around and opened the door in the new SUV she had bought. Ryan turned and slid his legs out, tipped up and then reached back for a suitcase. Her instinct was to help him, but he had no trouble at all. Beth hopped out of the back and started carrying things inside. Now six years old, she was excited at starting school.

Ryan was home, Sharon was completely happy. All of those terrible months, years had happened to someone else. She did notice that he wasn't as funny as he had been. Before he always looked like he was up to something, or making some wisecrack. Now he spent many long hours resting, or just looking out the window at traffic going by. He also was constantly taking off his legs and fiddling with them, making tiny adjustments until he got them exactly right.

But it was still all right. She had quickly learned that making love to a man with two steel legs is different than with a man with real legs.

Then he tried taking them off, managing to scratch her with the long screws that stuck out of the remains of his stumps. He solved that with two padded cushions he made to put on at bedtime.

The thrusts were different, it was more difficult. She solved that easily by often being on top, her hands on his chest. She found it to be impossible to not trace the many long lines of scars he had on his chest and torso with her fingertips.

Ryan never seemed to mind that. Sometimes he looked at her oddly, she thought it was because it took him a few seconds to bring his left eye into focus.

Sharon settled into her new life, it actually was her old life, just nearly completely different.

+++

One warm afternoon, she heard voices.

Walking out onto their patio to find out who Ryan was talking to was a complete shock to her system.

Norman sat there across the table from Ryan!

Steeling herself, and suddenly wishing she had simply told Ryan everything that had happened to her, she forced herself to walk out there.

Ryan looked at her, she saw no anger, no emotion at all.

"Just dropped by to see how ya was making out, babe. I miss seeing ya sometimes." Norman said.

Then it was small talk, Norman probed Ryan about some of what happened to him overseas but got little result. Ryan never spoke about it much, not even to Sharon. Then Norman turned to Sharon with a grin.

"Hey, if you ever need work again just let me know, OK?" He said.

Sharon glanced at him, let the comment slide off by mumbling that she didn't want to work.

Norman caught her look.

"Oh! Hey, I'm sorry, I guess you didn't tell...I mean..." He glanced quickly at Ryan, who simply sat there.

"Well, I should be going. Lots of things to do. You guys stop by the clubs anytime, I will spring for a drink!" He got up and looked Sharon up and down. Then he left.

"I guess you have some questions, honey?" Sharon told Ryan, her face flaming.

"No, not really." He answered.

"Norman...and I? We...he helped me, I know it sounds strange, but I needed to take care of Beth. I let him...." Sharon looked down, she was ashamed. Her world was not numb any more, she knew what she had done.

"I understand, honey. You thought I was..dead. I don't even want to know any of the details, they don't matter."

"Really? You won't..hate me? I was a...a..." Tears slid down her cheeks.

"I know. At least most of all of that. If I could have made things turn out different, I would have. But I couldn't, I can't." He looked at her.

"Can you forgive me?"

"Honey, there is nothing to forgive. We started again that day I woke up and you were sitting there." He smiled at her.

Sharon went over and hugged him, they held each other for a very long time.

+++

Later, she had to ask.

"What did Norman tell you?" She said to him as they lay side by side in bed.

"He told me I was the luckiest mother fucker on the face of the Earth!" Ryan laughed.

"So I asked him why, hell, my legs are blown off, I got all shot to shit, years held in a little brick cell? No way will I ever really work again."

"What did he say to that?" She asked.

"Ya got that broad and she loves ya! Word for word." Ryan looked at Sharon with a smile.

"I guess Norman isn't such a bad guy after all." She grinned.

"You could have done worse, I guess." He answered. Sharon's mind wandered off to memories for a moment, she fell quiet.