Defiance Ch. 13

****

Tate couldn't breathe. He lay across Tanis's broad shoulder, tied up and gagged and utterly helpless. He had been so stupid. He'd seen the signs, noticed the look of want in the boys eyes. Tanis had acted so naive but a part of Tate had known that the young prince possessed some of the madness that gleamed in his brother's eyes.

God's, he couldn't bear being raped again, not by Christian's baby brother. "Tate, please stop trembling." Tanis's voice almost sounded sane. "I'm not going to hurt you, I swear."

Tate moaned into his gag.

He was taken to a part of the palace he had never visited before. It was dark and unkempt and utterly abandoned. Tate felt the blood rush in his ears. He screamed into the gag.

"Who goes there?" A grizzly voice called out. Two men stepped into a pool of light; both of them heavily armed guards.

"Prince Tanis." The big scarred one said with some surprise. Tate spent a moment thinking his accent sounded familiar but he couldn't place it "Have you come to see the prophet again?"

"Yes, and this time I have a visitor." He hefted Tate on his shoulder. "How much to keep this quiet?"

"Is that the half-blood?" The grizzly voice one asked in disbelief. Both men were suddenly looking at him.

"How much?" Tanis repeated stonily.

"What are you planning on doing to him?" the scarred one asked quietly.

"Nothing that will harm him, you have my word. Do you plan on moving?"

"My lord, if Prince Christian learns what you're doing it will mean all of our heads." The scarred one said, very softly as his eyes lingered on Tate. "Perhaps you should rethink whatever it is you have planned?"

Hope ignited in Tate and for a moment he thought someone might dissuade whatever madness had possessed the young prince. His hopes were quickly squashed though when the other guard slapped the scarred ones chest and let out a booming laugh. "Come now Adam, the prince isn't going to hurt the half-blood and if he wishes passage who are we to stop him?" He looked back at Tanis with greed stricken eyes. "Adam had a point though milord, for such passage it seems nothing less than twenty gold's would suffice."

"Fine," Tanis said as he fished out a bulging purse. "There are thirty in here, see to it that you keep quite."

The guard's opened the door for them and Tate was taken into the dark again. He moaned into his gag and heard Tanis sigh beneath him.

"I'm going to put you down now Tate. Bear in mind that even if you run off you won't have anywhere to go. These stairs lead to a tower with only one room. The only way down is past the guards. You won't get away

He dropped Tate to his feet and pulled out a wicked looking dagger. The half-blood recoiled. Tanis sighed again and started sawing through the ropes securing Tate's hands. As he was working on the smaller man's legs Tate reached up and pulled away the gag. "What now?" He asked, his voice so small he barely recognised it as his own.

Tanis straightened up and looked thoughtfully at the halfling. "I'm sorry I frightened you by bringing you here in this manner but I had no choice. You wouldn't come willingly."

"Do you plan on raping me?" He asked; with so little emotion that he felt another piece of what was once himself break away. He slowly rubbed the feeling back into his wrists as the prince pulled an aghast expression.

"I'm not going to hurt you Tate, I already told you that. I've brought you here because there is someone you need to meet." He gave the smaller man a slight push up the stairs. "Go on." He urged.

Tate took the first few stairs docilely enough but stopped suddenly, unable to move. He turned to Tanis with a pleading expression. He couldn't help himself. Despite Tanis's word that he meant no harm Tate could not shake the feeling that he was willingly walking to his own grave.

"Tanis, I want to leave." He tried to keep his expression calm but his heart was beating so wildly he could barely contain his fear.

There were only a few steps separating them. Tanis closed the slight distance between them so quickly Tate instinctively stumbled back. "We don't have time for this!" He said, clearly frustrated as he took another step forward, effectively herding Tate up the stairs as the smaller man continued to give ground to him. "I really don't want to Tate but I will drag you up there myself if you don't start moving. I swear I will."

Anger began to beat away at him, pushing away fear and dread. It seemed Christian and Tanis were not so different after all and though Tate was loath to test the other man's temper too thoroughly he could not help but react.

"I hate you." He heard himself say, quite unintentionally though he meant every word of it. "You're even worse than your brother, for at least he's honest about what he is. You're a monster Tanis. You claimed to have captured the gypsies out of necessity for your own life but the truth is that they meant nothing to you. You claim to have stolen me for your brother but any fool can see you're as obsessed with me as he is. What sickness afflicts your family so that you cannot find love willingly? Is it madness or are you just so unlovable that no woman or man would ever choose to offer their affections to you freely?"

The hurt of the young man's face almost made Tate falter but his heart had hardened over the past few years. Uncaring of the consequences, he allowed his hatred to swell as he pulled back his hand and slapped his tormentor with every ounce of his strength he possessed. The prince's head snapped back as he let out a small hiss of pain. He looked back at Tate, not with anger as he expected, but with sparkling tears at his eyes.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, advancing again though this time Tate refused to give ground. "You're right about me, I am a monster. All of those poor people were killed because I was too weak to defy my brother. I soothed my conscious knowing that you were headed here anyway, that Lord Ralan already had you. The truth is that it's my fault you have been so badly treated, not just by my brother, but by your own countrymen as well. You're right, I'm every bit the monster Christian is, a weak creature incapable of defying a mad man." He let out a shuddering sob. "Though perhaps I am mad as well for I am obsessed with you Tate. I want you so fiercely that it keeps me up at night. It terrifies me how much I want you. And yet I don't touch you as I yearn to because I know you would hate me for it. Does that not make me any less of a beast?"

The prince's chest heaved as fat tears rolled feely down his cheeks. He looked for a moment like little more than an overgrown child. Despite his anger and fear Tate could not help but wonder at the torment the boy had been enduring. He seemed so vulnerable. Tate felt his heart soften slightly in face of such obvious anguish.

"Tanis, if you're honest and you have no desire to harm me why did you bring me here? You must know how it looks?"

"I thought you would calm down when you realised we were entering the prophets tower? I'm hardly going to take the time to bring you here only to ravish you before a blind soothsayer!"

"Prophet?" Tate echoed. "What prophet?"

The boy stopped, staring at him curiously. "Tate, do you ever dream?"

It was an absurd question and so totally out of context that Tate blurted an answer. "Of course."

"What do you dream about?" He asked.

The halfling laughed a little hysterically at that. He had not expected to be asked about his dreams after being kidnapped and dragged to a forbidden tower. He sat down suddenly, his legs no longer able to support him. "It's not something I care to talk about." He said, thinking of the nightmares that filled his nights.

Tanis's expression altered into something unreadable. He sank down beside Tate suddenly, though he was careful to keep some distance between them. "I dream often." He confessed. "Sometimes it's wonderful. Everything I ever wished for is mine." His eyes lingered on Tate's face, the need there so open that Tate flinched away from it. Tanis looked away quickly, staring at his feet. "I also dream of things that are bigger than anything I've ever experienced. I see a world quite unlike my own. It's huge and powerful and far beyond my reckoning. The prophet shows me these things from time to time. He said he saw goodness in me that he hoped he could nourish" He laughed self mockingly at that. "Sometimes he can compel me to act for him, though I've never begrudged him the need. He's the one that wanted to see you. He said that there was something about you that sang to him. He knows you well."

"Do you-do you ever dream of flying?" Tate whispered, quite unbelieving that the words were escaping his lips.

"No," Tanis said, watching him with something akin to amazement. "But I've seen creatures of unimaginable size take to the heavens. They sore high above me, dancing and weaving among the clouds. I tried to reach out to them once but the prophet forbid it."

"Come," Tate said, standing up and offering his hand to the young prince. Tanis gaped at him for a moment before taking Tate's hand and allowing himself to be helped to his feet. "Let us meet this prophet of yours before Christian discovers my absence."

"You forgive me then?" Tanis asked, still holding Tate's hand.

The halfling flashed a quick smile. "It seems all I ever do is forgive you Tanis. Let us hope you're worthy of it."

*****

They took the stairs quickly with Tate's hand urging him on. Tanis relished the feel of the delicate hand in his own. How often had he dreamed of Tate touching him willingly? He tried not to bring attention to it, knowing that Tate was not knowingly holding onto him for any other purpose than hurrying him on. Still, it felt wonderful just being able to touch him.

They reached the top door and the halfling stopped, touching the wood for a moment in seeming wonder. "How could I not know he was here?" He whispered in awe. His hand's caressed the aged wood tenderly. "The wood is silencing his cries." He declared mournfully.

Tanis reached past him and opened the aged wood. He felt nothing special about the door. It was oak, same as always. He gave Tate's hand a little pull as the small man remained where he was. "He's waiting." Tanis reminded him.

They stepped in together and Tanis felt a familiar wash of shame when his eyes aligned on the bent over figure huddled in the furthest corner of the room. "Go on." He urged the halfling.

Tate seemed frozen in place. "W-what is he?" He whispered.

"His name is Milianious's." The seer looked up at the sound of his own name. The past weeks had taken a terrible toll on the already floundering ageless one. His slight frame had practically caved in on its self. The unseeing eyes were distant and lost, mindless even. "I've told you already Tate, he's a prophet."

"No," Tate whispered, and Tanis was shocked to see the tears streaming down the other man's face. "He's so much more than that. By the gods, what have you kept hidden up here Tanis?"

For reasons unbeknownst to him Tanis cringed away from the half-blood's accusations. "It wasn't me Tate; I never wanted to keep him here. Christian-"

But Tate wasn't even listening to him anymore. He approached Milianious almost reverently, dropping to his knees at the creature's feet and resting his forehead against the prophet's knees. "I'm sorry." Tate whisper over and over again. The small mans back began to shake as sobs wracked his slight frame. "Please, I don't know what to do. They're dead, all of them dead because of me!"

Tanis held his breath as he watched one of Milianious's trembling hands reach out and gently stroke the top of Tat's head. "You must have courage little brother." The prophet said, his voice raw and cracked. "They would break you and me and turn us into what they believe we should be. Take heart in your lineage little brother. It will sustain you."

"Lineage," Tate spit out bitterly. "You mean as a half breed bastard."

"You never knew your mother." He said almost absently, as if he was talking through his sleep." She named you know. You wear part of that name; your father permitted you to keep at least a part of it." He looked up sharply, his face upturned towards the door. He let out a strangled moan. "Get out now, both of you, you have to get out! Run, run! He's coming! Run!"

Tanis was moving before Tate had a chance to question the prophet further. He caught the smaller mans arm and dragged him out of the room. Tate looked deathly pale beside him. They both knew who was coming for them. They ran down the stairs, heedless of the fact that one misstep could break both of their necks. "If he's coming up we'll run straight into him!" Tate gasped as he stretched his shorter legs to try and keep up with the younger man. Tanis didn't answer. They would just have to have to have faith that Milianious's had given them enough warning. They burst out of the bottom stairwell and separated without a word. Tanis made it back to his chambers without meeting his elder brother. He could only hope that Tate had fared as well.

****

Tate's lungs burned as he sprinted through the castle corridors. He tried not to dwell on the almost unbearable need to turn back around and return to the prophet. Something in the creature called out to him, something that Tate had never felt before. It enraged him to think that they kept such a majestic creature chained and locked down. The prophet was not meant to stay on the ground with mortals. Tate didn't know how to explain it but something within him pictured Milianious's up in the heavens, souring above the mortals he felt such little regard for. It should have frightened him, he was mortal after all, he was one of those creatures that the prophet held in disdain, and yet-

He actually ran into them, careening so hard into Christian that he managed to knock the taller man off balance. Tate went down with a solid thump, but he was back up in less than a moment and ready to turn tail if he needed to. He noticed Christian's betrothed was smiling at him. Her first smile for him, and only because she quite obviously expected him to be quite thoroughly thrashed for almost knocking over their future king.

He could barely catch his breath. He had spent too much time locked up in the castle. He realised that he needed to work out a way of persuading Christian to let him out to run occasionally. Providing he didn't kill him first of course.

"Watch where you're going you clumsy fool!" Richard bellowed, lashing out at Tate though the bastard was probably thrilled by the whole thing. Tate managed to dodge below the other mans fist by dropping into a deep bow.

"Please forgive me your highness." He said with as much composure as he could manage, it was difficult when he couldn't breathe though. "I didn't see you."

"Where have you been?" Christian demanded his voice tight and controlled. For a moment Tate wanted to roll in on himself. He recognised that tone and knew it would mean bruises for him on the morrow. "I've had people looking for you Tate. You left without telling me where you were going, without asking for permission to leave."

"I'm sorry highness; I was visiting the library. I didn't think --" the slap came out of nowhere and almost knocked him off his feet. Christian had never hit him in public before. Servants looked up, the sudden glee, curiosity or fear clear on all of their faces. Even Phatilia looked alarmed.

"Don't you dare lie to me you little bastard." Christian hissed as he caught Tate's arm and propelled him up the corridor. "Get back to your room and wait for me there. You and I are going to speak of this later."

Tate stumbled but managed to right himself without falling. He looked back at them but they were already moving on. Only Phatilia looked back at him but Tate noticed with some surprise that she wasn't smiling anymore. Poor girls probably seeing her own future, he thought solemnly. Despite himself he felt a moment of pity for her, after what he had experienced with Christian he couldn't force himself to wish it on anyone else.

The acid sting in his cheek lessened to a dull throb by the time he reached Christian's chambers. He rubbed at it absently as he dwelled on the prophet's words. Why had he mentioned Tate's mother? She was a commoner woman of no concern or station who had died kinless and friendless in a foreign country. Tate had never even known her name.

He shook his head sadly as he stood up and made him way to the large bay window leading out onto the outer patio. Tate forced the doors open and stepped out into the cool evening breeze. He looked down at the city streaming with life beneath him and for a brief and solitary moment he had to fight the compulsion to fling himself off the balcony edge.

He let out a shaky breathe and stepped hastily back. "Not yet." He mumbled softly. "By the gods I'm not yet that desperate." He crumpled then, curling in on himself as he wrapped his hands firmly over his head.

"Tate?" Roses little voice filtered through him misery as she laid a soft hand on his shoulder. "Are you alright?"

He turned and caught her up in a fierce hug. "Hello darling," He said, forcing some cheer into his voice. "How was your day?

She settled in his lap and caught a lock of his hair in her hand. "Good enough," She said, which was her usual answer. "Is something wrong Tate?"

He debated lying to her but in the end it would make little difference. She would hear Christian no matter what he did. "I have angered the prince. He'll come back soon so I need you to go hide in your room. You're not to come out, no matter what you hear. Understand?"

She would have cried once. Now she stood up and brushed down her skirts. Her little hand lingered on Tate's hair for a moment before she gave a fierce nod of her head and ran off to their room. Tate watched her until she was in the relative safety of their chambers and settled down to await the prince.

******

Lukas took the stairs slowly, feeling an increasing bout of vertigo with each new step. He couldn't figure out if it was the mounting heights he was reaching or the pounding fear he felt at the prospect of the role he was about to play.

He supposed it made sense that he was to be placed high on the castle walls. As an archer he would hardly be stationed as a guard at Christian's door. It worried him though that despite the fact he was finally within the same walls as Tate there was still a great distance separating them. What chance did he have of meeting him when he was so far away from the royal chambers?

He reached the top step, wishing he could relay time, or perhaps even hide on the staircase. He snorted softly at the image, knowing that no true northern solider would be so nervous. He plastered on an impassive expression and walked the short distance to the archway where two other guards were standing at their posts.

Upon seeing him the younger of the two scowled and Lukas was hard pressed not to flinch away. Instead, as instructed by Adam he scowled right back.

"Took your time friend." The elder one said, though he didn't look nearly as hostile as his comrade.

"I'm here now." Lukas growled, surprised by their sudden smiles.

"Aye, and we'll return the favour when it's our turn to relive you." The young one clapped his companion jovially on the solider, all malice now mysteriously gone. "Come Manus; let's leave our friends to their posts. Dinner calls."

It was then that Lukas spotted his new comrade, already taking up position in the archway as other guards made their way past Lukas and down the spiralling staircase beyond.

A great many things ran through Lukas's mind as he took up his post beside the impassive and hulking solider, all of which lead to a screaming desire to runaway as fast as his legs could carry him. He was mad, utterly and completely insane to think he could fool anyone into believing he was a soldier.