Emily's Home - Ginger's Out Ch. 05

She set the glasses down on napkins and came out from behind the bar to sit next to me. "Ginger honey, you look like crap." She smiled. "Are you okay?" She was trying to be nice and I appreciated the thought. I shook my head.

"No Candy, I'm not. You're very sweet to ask; thank you. Mo's meeting me here when she gets here. I don't mean to be rude but I'm not really up for sharing." I leaned over and gave her a little peck on the lips and tried for something like a smile. She really wasn't convinced but she nodded.

"Okay, I just didn't want you to be alone. It looks like you could use a friend." That set off the faucets again. Candy put her arms around me and let me cry, god love her. Okay, enough for god's sake Ginger. Compose yourself and pretend you're a big kid. I hugged Candy, smiled my thanks, took the glasses and headed for the table. Thankfully the few people who were there didn't look at me. Apparently the spectacle of my collapse was enough.

I dumped a bunch of ice cubes in the vodka, stirred it with my finger like a big kid, took a sip and then another. The music was so goddamn loud I couldn't hear myself think and I was glad. I had a thought: symmetry. Lily had seduced me the first time I had met her. Well, I was a little vulnerable, having just come from Dallas and Julia. So, if she'd done it with me, she certainly could do it again. Nora? Shit. I had no reason to complain about Lily's morals. Yeah I'd kissed Kathy, though suppose I could claim extenuating circumstances. I had gushed so effusively about Kathy to Lily and I saw the light in her eyes when I teased her. But I never thought she would ... how the hell did she get Kathy's number anyway? My purse, my phone ... I was really pissed off now.

The phone rang -- Lily. Fuck you! Would she think to come here? Had I mentioned this place? In the whirlwind of emotions I couldn't remember. I took another sip of my drink and stared at the floor. I needed to call Jenny to ... oh ... I started again. I wanted her to come and be with me and I didn't. I didn't want her to see me like this -- a complete wreck. This was like Asshole 2.0 except this hurt way more. Years of decay had led to my soon-to-be divorce. This was going along so nicely -- or so it seemed. I laughed bitterly. Simon and Garfunkel's song sounded real good right about now. Wall myself off to everyone. You're being an idiot Ginger. You love Lily. Yeah great; a lovely Thursday surprise huh?

In strode a gorgeous head of red hair with a concerned look on her face. Candy rushed to Mo, handed her a beer and spoke quickly in hushed tones. Mo looked in my direction, shook her head, squeezed Candy's hand, nodded, and headed my way. I stood; she hugged me fiercely. "Mo, please take me home with you." My voice was soft, plaintive, and shaky. Me: begging. She shook her head, kissed me softly and warmly. She sat me in the chair and sat with her back to the wall. I knew she wanted to keep a lookout for Lily. Cop eyes; she'd be able to tell.

"Talk to me Ginger -- please, honey." Her hand reached across the table and squeezed mine. I nodded and took a good gulp of my drink. Mo frowned.

"We had this project at work. My partner and I finished it early and presented it to our boss, who was thrilled. The two of us went out to lunch. She dropped me off before heading home. I called Lily; she had two appointments. I went grocery shopping. I was going to make a home cooked meal as a surprise." I shook my head. "I opened the garage door as I pulled in the driveway. Lily's car was there. I was surprised -- maybe she had cancellations, whatever. I went inside, set down the groceries, and headed to look for her. I ... I turned ... I saw them, Mo." I couldn't stop myself. The tears just came. She stood, pulled me to my feet, and held me, her arms tight around me, my head on her shoulder. I sobbed hot, bitter tears. She let me get it out, kissing my cheek, rubbing my back, holding me.

Eventually we sat back down. I reached for my drink; Mo put her hand on mine softly and firmly. She shook her head. "Not too fast and not too much Ginger, especially today -- please." I smiled and nodded. "What's the rest of it honey?"

I took a deep breath. "I saw Lily and my trainer, Kathy, together, in our bed." Mo's eyes showed her shock. I nodded; she shook her head. "I backed out of the room, got my purse and coat, and got the fuck out of there. I didn't know where to go or what to do. I sat in a parking lot and cried until you called. Then I came here to wait for you. Lily called me. I didn't answer it." I looked at her, bewildered and completely devastated.

Mo's eyes were warm and her body language was ... professional? She was empathetic, sizing up the situation. That's the best I can come up with. I took another sip of my drink. Mo motioned to Candy, who rushed over. "Bring us some coffee and some munchies -- anything, just lots." Candy smiled and nodded. "Does Lily know about this place? Is she likely to come here?"

I shrugged. "She ... I think I've mentioned it. If I did she may come. I don't know for sure, Mo. Please, I don't want to be alone tonight." Candy brought us nachos and coffee -- big mugs, with cream and sugar.

Mo pushed the food at me. Why argue? I ate. "You can't come home with me, Ginger. I have roommates and one of them is my girlfriend, someone I've been with for some time now." Good god in heaven. We'd never had ... no, taken the time to talk about this and it was always out there. The chemistry was so strong we had ignored the details. And, of course, there was Lily. My mind drifted and I shook my head. This was how it all started -- in Dallas, in a restaurant. What had Julia said? Looking forlorn; fuck me all to hell, that was what Lily had said and that, ironically, was how I wound up in a hotel room with her. And here I am again, forlorn -- and alone. Fabulous.

"Okay Mo. You're right; you have your life and your girlfriend. It's preposterous for me to think you'd drop everything for me. I'll pay the tab and get a hotel room for the weekend." I smiled and stood up, leaned over, and kissed her. She grabbed me, spun me around, and pushed me to the chair next to her.

"You jerk. I care about you more than you know. It kills me to know you've gone home every fucking night to your Lily. And now you want me? Christ on a cracker Ginger, sit in my chair for a minute!" Her head was down, her voice low. "We went back to that shit box and made love. I think about it every damn day, Ginger. You tore me up one side and down the other. Geez!" She shook her head. "You're scared too. Of me, my job, and the toll it might take on our relationship." Oh my god! "It scares me too -- the hold you have on me." What? Holy crap, she was crying. My bad ass cop was crying. I leaned in, lifted her chin, and kissed her. Her lips were soft, her kiss was so sweet. I melted.

I heard Candy cough. Mo pushed me away. Fucking hell, Lily was in the doorway, her eyes moving from side to side. Mo was up and at her in a flash. She took Lily by the arm and shoved her out the door. Candy made eye contact with me; something must have shaken her. She came and sat with me and held my hand. I was scared for Lily and scared for Mo. No, I have no idea. I'm just telling you what I was feeling. Mo could destroy Lily physically but she wouldn't. The cost would be her badge. I took a sip of my drink -- and another.

Mo came back into the club. She came to the table as Candy was getting up, nodded at her and sat down. She sipped her coffee. No, her hands weren't shaking. When she turned to me here eyes were warm. "You okay?" My eyes widened; she smiled. "She's gone, Ginger. I told her that you didn't want to see her, not tonight, not until -- whenever. She was furious." A thin smile. "I wanted to punch her lights out. She was verbally offensive until I reminded her that, as a police officer, there were limits to what was tolerated in that area -- especially the names she was calling me. I made rather graphic mention of the fact you found them in bed together. I may have ... umm, gone a little overboard." Another thin smile. "She was extremely specific about what I could do to myself, which I have, many times." Her blue eyes glittered. That smile was a full hundred watts and glorious. I giggled. "I have to tell you honey, this isn't the best night for us to be together and I want to be with you ... well, as much as I suspect you want to be with me."

"Do you have to work tomorrow?" She nodded. Shit. I didn't want to spend the night alone but if I had to choose I would rather have whatever time we could have together than not. I teased her. "Can't you call in dead or something?"

She snickered. "I already have. And all four of my grandmothers have died too." I laughed at that one. Candy must have jimmied the music -- a slow song came on. I grabbed Mo's hand and we went to the dance floor. We were one; body to body, slow, sweet, slinky, sexy. The song ended; the clapping started. We stopped and looked around -- everyone in the joint had come to watch us dance. They were smiling, clapping, crying. Geez ... Mo and Candy introduced me to maybe a dozen or so women -- and I have no clue what their names are. They kissed me, hugged me, and told me how sweet it was ... yada, yada. How fabulous. We finally made our way back to the table.

"You have someone to go home to Mo. I want to be with you but I'm hurt, confused, and maybe it's just better if I spend the night alone. It seems to me that both of us have decisions to make. It seems to me that it's in both of our interests to make them without the complication of sex. ... making love." Mo was listening intently, looking at me with quiet, soft eyes. It was hard for me to read what was going on. "You have to go to work tomorrow and I do as well. I can't thank you enough for coming here for me. I'll see you when I see you I guess." I leaned and kissed her.

"You're really going to leave? You won't stay and be with me?"

"I want to but it ... geez, I'm such a wreck. I was going to make us a home cooked meal. It would have been a quiet night; maybe we'd have made love. Now, I have no clue, absolutely none at all." A flash crossed my mind. I stood, put on my coat, leaned in for a last kiss, and said goodbye. I paid the tab -- over Candy's objections.

I got in the car and listened to Lily's voice mail. She was in tears. 'I'm sorry' (you better be); 'I saw the groceries' (yeah, our nice romantic dinner); 'I feel like shit' (good, I feel worse). There was more; I deleted it. I headed to the office and hurried upstairs. Jodi gave me a funny look. I smiled and waved. I shrugged off my coat and turned on my computer.

I went to George's office and knocked. He looked up and smiled. "Playing hooky huh?" I smiled.

"Yeah, I guess so. Is it okay if I take a personal day tomorrow George? I have something I need to take care of." His face showed concern; he nodded. I thanked him, told him I would see him Monday, and went back to my desk.

I typed an email to Lily: I don't want to see you or talk to you. You've hurt me very badly. I'm coming to get my things tomorrow -- DO NOT be there. I'll be at the house by nine and be gone by 9:30. Lily, if you're smart, and I know you are, you will never show up at the L Room again. Ginger. There was no reason to add a lot of other things I might have. I shut the computer off, reached into my purse, and dialed Jenny.

She answered. I said, "Hi Jen. Umm, I have a request. Is it okay if I fly to St. Louis tomorrow and stay for the weekend? I need some time to talk with you." Silence.

"Yes of course, Em ... Ginger. I assume it's sudden and it's bad. Care to share?" I sighed.

"I caught Lily cheating on me, in our bed, with my trainer this afternoon Jen." I heard the gasp. "Yeah I know; nice huh? I'm going to get a hotel room tonight, get my things from the house tomorrow, and fly to St. Louis. I'll text you the flight number and times. Where is there a decent hotel near you, honey?"

"There's a Country Inn and Suites in St. Charles, not too far from where we are. Do you want me to come pick you up?"

"Let me book the flight first. I'll fly out of Columbus on Southwest if I can. I'll get the details to you as soon as I make the reservations. Country Inn and Suites? It seems to me there are a few of those in Dayton. Let me get started. It's probably, what, four your time. I'll call you at home tonight okay?" We agreed on that and said our goodbyes. I turned back to the computer.

Oh good, there's a flight at one that gets into St. Louis around four. Sunday? Yay; there's a non-stop at 6:30 pm that would get me back to Columbus a little before nine. Rand McNally said it's a ninety minute drive. That works. I could get my stuff from Lily's, get back to the hotel, pack a bag for the weekend, and drive to Columbus without rushing too much. I booked a stay at the Country Inn on Yankee Street -- tonight thru Monday. I made another reservation in St. Charles for Friday and Saturday nights. I joined 'Club Carlson' - might as well; I may be there a while. I really didn't want to pay for a room I wouldn't be staying in while I was out of town, but I didn't want my things at Lily's either.

I turned off the computer and put on my coat. Everyone else was gone. I went to my car. Damn, a parking ticket. It was perfect for such a shitty day. I had printed directions from the office to the hotel. Along the way I spotted what looked like a decent restaurant -- Sweeney's Seafood House. I would go there for dinner. I got to the hotel, checked in and went to the room. My goodness; it was gorgeous. It was bright, with a couch, a pretty good size TV, and a hair dryer. They serve a breakfast buffet. Bonus! I used the washroom, freshened up a bit, put on some makeup and fluffed my hair. You couldn't tell by looking that my world had crashed and burned today. Oh well.

I drove to the restaurant. Oh joy ... table for one. The broiled seafood platter with scallops, tilapia and mahi mahi sounded fabulous. I ordered a salad and rice as the sides. No wine, but the 'Allies Win the War Strong Ale' made me laugh so I ordered it. I had a thought. I'd better send Lily a text. There's no guarantee she'd read the email, so I did. It was the same as the email. I stared at it for a few minutes then hit send. I was virtually certain she would call.

The beer was fantastic. What a hysterical name, huh? As I ate the salad I wondered how something so good could go so wrong so quickly. I took another sip of beer. Not much I could do about it now. Just enjoy your dinner and the weekend with Jenny, David and the kids. So I did. The fish was simply wonderful - absolutely perfect. Dinner couldn't have been better. Except, of course, for the obvious. I will come back here soon. It was bright, had a nice menu, and was crowded. I stopped on the way back and got a bottle of chardonnay -- not too much, since I had to be up and out early.

It was dinner time in St. Louis and I didn't want to disturb that so I put on the boob tube. College and pro basketball and 'Big Bang Theory' -- the choices didn't exactly excite me. I turned it off, got a glass and poured some wine. I took off my blouse and skirt, hung them in the closet and sat on the couch with my book and the wine.

The call came a little later. I debated as the phone rang. I opened it. "What do you want?"

"Please come home."

"No. It's your home, not mine, not after today." She started to cry. "This isn't helping any. We need to be apart. No, I don't know for how long. You can say what you want, so can I. Each of us has things we can yell about and none of them will help. In fact, they'll only make things worse. Just be sure to be gone when I come tomorrow. I want to pack my stuff, find someplace to stay, and we'll see what happens. Just promise not to be there tomorrow."

"Okay, if that's what you want. I won't be."

"No you jerk, that's not what I want. What I wanted was to come home, fix us a nice dinner, and spend a quiet night together. Now goodnight." I hung up the phone. Oh I was so mad!!! I stormed around the room. I should be home, working out with Kathy, dinner in the oven. God damn her!! God damn the two of them.

The phone rang. She was too damn smart to be this stupid and call again. It was Mo. "Hi."

"Hi yourself; how ... no, oh shit, just tell me what's going on?" I kind of laughed; there was no easy way to ask.

"I'm all done being hurt, at least for the moment. Now I'm just plain pissed off. Sorry I left Mo, but I had a bunch of things to do. I called my sister; I'm flying to St. Louis tomorrow for the weekend. I found a hotel, had dinner, and am sitting here waiting to call Jenny and give her the flight details."

"How many times has Lily called?"

"Two; I let the first one go to voice mail. She called again a little while ago. I told her not to be there tomorrow morning when I come for my clothes and things. She promised she would be gone. There wasn't much more to say."

"I wish you would have stayed. Are you in a hotel? Do you want me to come see you?" Oh my god, of course I do honey. My body ached for the touch and taste of her.

"You know the answer to that Mo. There's nothing more I want tonight than to spend it with you. That's not going to happen. You're home, you have your honey and you're working tomorrow. It's better this way; at least I think it is. I honest to god don't know anymore."

"Okay. This just sucks. I hate having a chance to be with you and not be able to."

"Look, I want us to be more than a fling. I have no idea if that can happen -- for either of us. There's the rub. We are both involved with someone else. Each of us needs to figure our own stuff out before we can deal with us. Right?"

"Yeah, I know you're right. I'm just a cop, not as smart as you, Ginger."

"Oh bullshit Mo! You're smart as a whip, you read people like a book, gorgeous beyond belief, kiss like an angel, and make love like a she-devil." I started laughing. "Oh my god, we are so messed up. I hope we can figure this out."

"I know; me too. Okay, Ginger, you have a great weekend with your sister. I'll talk to you ... whenever I guess."

"I'll call you some time Monday, okay? Have a good weekend Mo and please babe, be careful out there." I hung up. I needed a good sip of wine. I giggled; I wondered if Tammy had the guts to ribbon herself before going out on her date with her Jeffrey. She was going to have a fun night. I sighed and called Jenny.

"Hi Em ... were you able to get everything done? Are you okay? Did you talk to Lily?"

Geez. "Hi Jen ... yeah, I was the busy chick. I'm at a Country Inn, had dinner, made reservations in St. Charles, and have flight details. Ready?" I gave her the times and flight numbers for tomorrow and Sunday. "Is it okay to leave that late?"

"Absolutely. I'll leave work a little early to pick you up. We'll go to the hotel, get you checked in, and have time to chat before heading home for dinner."

"Oh Jen, that would be wonderful. Do you still have the Ford?"

"No, we traded it in and have a Subaru Forester. It's green. I'll find you ... I remember what you look like." We giggled.

"Brat! So what's the weather going to be like this weekend?"

"Shut up about the weather and tell me about you and Lily." I sighed.

"I didn't answer the first time; she left a voice mail. I sent her an email. Told her I was coming for my clothes and things tomorrow morning then realized she might not read it before then. I sent her a text knowing she'd call, which she did. She begged me to come home. I was pretty bitchy Jen -- I told her it was her home, not mine." No comment. "I asked her to promise me that she wouldn't be there. 'Okay, if that's what you want.' That was when I got angry and yelled at her. I hung up on her. I just couldn't talk to her anymore."