Frankie's Story Ch. 07bymarkelly©
(This story interlocks with each chapter so if you come into this story other than the beginning, then you may well scratch your head at some of the comments within this chapter. I've tried to make this a glimpse into the lives and lifestyle of three people. They chose to keep there lives private, isn't it strange how life never lets that happen.)
"Hello ... M ... Jack," said Samantha in a strained voice.
"Hi Samantha, how have you been?"
She broke down and started sobbing. I could hear her repeating, "I'm sorry, master," over and over again. My heart broke listening to her but I stayed quiet on the line to give her time to pull herself together before continuing.
"It's time you came home. Why don't you come to my office tomorrow morning?"
Samantha arrived at the lobby in the morning and signed in for our meeting. Tony escorted her to my office, taking care that she was properly accompanied. She saw me leaning at the entrance to my office as she rounded the corner. She let out a squeal and rushed to me. Poor Tony didn't know what to do. Her rush up the corridor had caught him unprepared. I waved to Tony, around the sobbing woman in my arms letting him know it was okay. He sighed in relief as he returned to his desk.
"She's badly hurt. You tried to tell me and I didn't listen. All the times I should have been talking to my sisters. Those are wasted times now and no matter what I do or say I can't get them back, can I?"
I shook my head silently and held her tighter.
"My sister warned me of the inner chaos that would follow and I ignored her. I thought I knew it all. I thought I had it all, but now when I think about it I had nothing. I've wasted so much time."
Finally, she pulled away from me so she could look at me.
"I have no right to ask this. Hell, I'm lower than pond scum for the way I have treated you all. Please, can you take me home? I know the owner of the company. I've even slept with him a couple of times. I'm sure I can get him to let you go early."
I laughed. For the first time in what feels like forever, I actually laughed. Even Mrs. Gillins leaned out of her now open door to take a look before she smiled and went back into her office. Samantha didn't even want to drive and asked if she could leave her car and come home with me. She stared out of the window not saying a word as she hung onto my arm the entire journey. She was lost in thought until my hand touched her arm. It caught her by surprise and breaking into her musings, she jumped in her seat and let out a little gasp. She looked at me as if seeing me for the first time.
"This is going to hurt isn't it?"
There was a look of resignation in her eyes. I could see she knew what was coming and resigning herself to it as penance for her behavior, these last few months.
"Yes. I could take you back to your car if you wish. We can both call this a learning experience and get on with our lives but, Samantha, the moment you enter that cabin you are mine and I will hurt you for the hurt you have caused our family. There is no Frankie inside to protect you and, other than your safe word, you have nothing. Do you trust me to know your limit?"
She stared ahead vacantly fighting her inner demons. She broke out of her thoughts with a shake and exited the car. Samantha stripped out of her clothes as she approached the cabin and knelt on the porch in front of the door, much like the first time she was here. I came up behind her, collecting her clothes and knelt beside her. I could see the tears streaming down her face and her lips trembling in fear. She started rubbing the arm Arnold broke reflexively in her stress.
I quietly asked her, "What is your safe word?"
Her mouth opened but nothing came out. She started shaking all the while her eyes locked on the door in front of her.
I touched her shoulder and asked her again, "What is your safe word?"
"I ... can't."
Samantha started sobbing harder and shaking. She gripped her arm tightly to herself digging her nails into her side. She flinched and pulled away from me when I tried putting my arms around her.
I sighed as I watched her struggle. I stood up and extended my hand, "Come on, I can't let you go back home in the state you are in."
Samantha gulped and slowly took my hand and I lifted her to her feet. I escorted her to her seat in the kitchen. I pulled a bottle of water out of the fridge for her, left her to change into my jeans and t-shirt and picked up a set of Frankie's clothes for Samantha. I saw her trying to drink but her hand shook so badly she couldn't get it to her mouth.
She put down the bottle when she saw me. I placed the clothes in front of her telling her she needs to get dressed.
"But... I don't understand. You've seen me naked before, hell we have even had sex, why the need for clothes?"
What I said next stung her so much she was close to tears again.
"Because I owned you then, but I don't own you now. You are a guest in my house."
I almost didn't catch what she said next, as her head lowered to look at the tabletop.
I waited in silence.
"My safe word is 'Rosebud'. Please, I can do this."
"Sadly Samantha, I don't know if you can. You are fighting so hard against yourself I'm afraid you will break again and this time; I won't be able to put you together again. The slave within you either isn't strong enough or you have exhausted her to the point that she can't break free."
She raised her head and looked into my eyes. I saw the fire in her that I saw at the lakeside when she was with her mother and me. It began to flicker to life again. Her doubts and fears were being pushed back, by her desire to return to us.
"My safe word is 'Rosebud" I can do this," She said again through gritted teeth.
Her eyes narrowed slightly and she refused to look away.
"I carry your mark. You branded my soul that day at the lake. I am yours. I am your slave."
"You may be now and you may even be in a day or two from here, but, once you're at home with your folks, Samantha, you will do everything in your power suppress the slave in you. I once had a conversation with your folks and it went something like this, 'At the moment the slave is holding onto Samantha, who in turn is holding onto Frankie.' But right now all I see is you, holding the slave by the throat and you have no intention of letting go."
She blanched. She held herself rigid before speaking.
"Slave is stronger than me, she scares me."
I just shook my head and got up to make us both something to eat. We continued our conversation as we prepared lunch.
"I have every intention of sending you home after lunch and telling you to come back when you're not talking so much crap. Slave reached out to you and all you did was pay her lip service. Can't you see you're allowing that animal that broke your arm to continue victimizing you? You're allowing him to dictate how you should live your life. You came here, hoping that I would go easy on you and let you wear my collar again and give you the status without the commitment we both require."
"You know if I compromise and let you control the relationship, you will grow to resent all of us. You know deep inside you need me to take control for you to be content but you're too stubborn and too frightened to really let go. You are trying to control a situation that you can't control, out of fear. You need to ask yourself, 'Will I let my fear control me or will I trust the one man who will take care of me, control me?' You cannot be the slave you need to be and, therefore, the CEO you have to be, until you answer that question."
"You make it sound like I'm a complete basket case."
I smiled and shrugged.
"All I'm doing is simplifying what is going on in your head. I know what happened still haunts you. I understand you don't want to get hurt again, but slave needs the pain to center her and make her whole. It is a horrible place to be in. Have you spoken to Frankie about this? You should, if you haven't."
We sat and ate in silence. I cleared the table and cleaned the kitchen leaving Samantha to think through everything we discussed. It was clear to see she was still in deep turmoil.
"We have talked about you being a slave. We have even touched on Frankie as being a slave. Do you know what Red is?"
She looked at me as if as I asked her if the Earth was round. The only thing missing was the 'duh'.
"She's a slave, like us."
"Well, actually, no. I've never been one to put people into socially accepted cubbyholes. It's you girls that are comfortable with being called slave and it is your need to call me Master. Again, I understand that, even though I'm not exactly a card-carrying member of the BDSM society. I have, in fact, never set foot in a club and I have no desire to find a sub for an evening. Red isn't a slave. She's a switch. She is my submissive, but she is a dominant with Frankie, Shannon, and, possibly, you."
I sat back and watched the wheels go around in her head. I would have enjoyed watching her piece together what I had just said and why I had said it in the first place if it weren't for the seriousness of the situation.
"You think I'm a switch?"
I shrugged my shoulders and continued to look at her. Samantha was completely befuddled not knowing how, what I had just said fit into the situation. I thought it best to put her out of her misery now.
"In another lifetime perhaps, but this conversation is moot to be honest."
She placed her elbows on the table as she leaned forward, her eyes tried to hold my stare. There was clearly a war going on in her head and one I believed, I no longer had a stake in.
"Put your clothes on."
"No. Explain what you mean."
Samantha clearly winced, when she watched me lean toward her letting my anger show.
"Heed these words with great care young lady. So far, you have fucked with my life. You have caused me, Frankie and Red an immense amount of grief. You have not given me one reason why I need to deal with you any longer. Therefore, I strongly suggest you do as you're told or get a fucking cab back to your car and get the hell out of my life. I will send your clothes back to you, when they are cleaned."
We stared at each other across the table, neither willing to give in. This went on for what seemed to be hours before she broke our stare and slowly started dressing. I left the table taking my drink with me and went to the living room.
Samantha followed me once she was dressed. She knelt on the floor beside my seat. She set her gaze on the floor and held her pose waiting for me. She must have heard me sigh but she refused to look at me. It was clear; she was not leaving without every option explored. I was still wondering to whom I was having this conversation with.
"The slave within you reached out to you, when you found out about Frankie and me. You did all you could to ignore her, because of the scumbag that broke your arm. This is truth time Samantha. You have chosen him over your own wellbeing. You took the freedom that college afforded you to explore your slave self, while away from your parents, when you felt they would never understand. You trusted your boyfriend in this exploration but when he broke your arm, you turned on slave and blamed her for everything. You made her a scapegoat and when you returned to college, you did everyone who propositioned you to hide your shame and your pain."
She winced as I recounted even this much. I'm sure her father didn't know any of this and neither did I, until Rebecca had told Frankie. I had struck home with what I'd said.
"Frankie's life is compartmentalized. She can switch from Francine to Frankie so quickly and with so much ease that she cannot see those differences any longer. The reason is she trusts herself and her own judgment. She trusts me. You, on the other hand, trust no one, especially yourself. You fear your own judgment. You know slave trusts me but you can't trust your slave."
Her head quickly rose and she stared at me. Her eyes misted up, shoulders slumped slightly and she lowered her head again before she nodded her head in acknowledgment of my statement.
I let go of a breath, I didn't know I was holding. I may be breaking through her last barriers and I couldn't let up. "If you think I will relent and punish you and accept you back into our family you are mistaken. We still have a long ways to go. Shannon, Red and Frankie all have something in common that you don't."
"All three of them have bared their souls to me. They have allowed themselves to be vulnerable to me trusting me, to safeguard their hearts for them. Much of what I have found out about you did not come from you. You came here demanding Red's status without working for it. You believe you just needed to show just enough to get everything from us. It doesn't work that way. You cannot be the slave you need to be if you don't trust your master enough to be fully open and vulnerable to him."
"This may sound like a paradox but the more you open up to me and become vulnerable to me, the more I will treasure you and guard you."
Her eyes narrowed slightly as she thought about what I had just said.
"You, Samantha, have trust issues with men and quite frankly, I can't say I blame you. Perhaps you just heaped too much on yourself, too soon. I will be here and I will safeguard your collar for you, when you're ready. Maybe you do need to go home and decide whether you trust yourself and whether you trust me."
Once again, Samantha looked up at me, her shoulders were straight and her chest automatically pushed itself out as air filled her lungs.
"Please, my Master ..."
I put my hand up to stop her, "I know you regret what has happened over the last few months. You want to prove to me that you want to be a slave with persuasive arguments. Ask yourself honestly, what do you have to say that you haven't said already? There is only one way to prove to me that you are ready for this and you know what that is."
I looked at the clock in the kitchen. We had been talking well into the evening and, to be honest, I really didn't feel anything, had been accomplished.
"Samantha, I'm starting to feel like I've filled your head with too much and you haven't had the time to absorb and work through everything that's been said here. It's getting late. You will sleep in the guest room tonight. My room is off limits to you. You need time and space to think. We will talk again in the morning. I will not violate your privacy as my guest. It's a hard rule. Go to bed."
As I rose to take the cups into the kitchen, I heard her say something I had only ever heard Frankie say.
"I will obey."
She was gone when I had finished in the kitchen. I grabbed a bottle of water before heading out to the hot tub to relax. I heard both Red and Frankie's voices arguing for and against Samantha. I played over all the warnings and debates over accepting her. I had to chuckle when I remember Red clearly admonishing me for 'collecting waifs and strays'. She was right. I had laid everything on the line for Samantha.
It may have been too much, but she needed every scrap of information so she could make the right choice for herself. It was up to her now and no one else could choose for her. I hoped she would make the right choice and would not allow that bastard to dictate the rest of her life for her. I know I would miss her terribly if she chose to leave.
Her legs appeared next to me before I realized she was even there. She had slid into the hot tub before I could even stop her, not that I was going to try. She wanted to talk so why would I deny her?
"Before you say anything, I'm wearing a bathing suit. I heard the hot tub turning on. I'm no rocket scientist, but it doesn't take one to figure out you're not going to bed yet and since I'm under orders not to sneak into our room to be with you, I can be with you here, albeit with this thing on."
Ok, I smiled. What else could I do? What she did next caught me unprepared.
Samantha climbed onto my lap and placed her arms around me, and then said, "I promised I would think about all that we have talked about and that's the truth but for now I need to be this close to you. I hope I get SOME indication that you still care for me. If it should ever arise, I will be satisfied but I will deny ever having ... um ... felt your care."
This Goddamned woman always has a way of making me smile. I shook my head and drew her close to me, just not TOO close.
"Tell me about the early days."
Pulling my head back to look at her, uncertain of what she was asking of me.
"The original gang of three, what was it like in the early days?"
Once Samantha recognized the look of understanding, she settled her head on my shoulder as I reminisced about my past with Shannon and Red. She only interrupted when she suggested we move back into the cabin before we both turned into prunes. Even as we both got out of the tub, there was no respite. Samantha quickly dashed into my room returning with t-shirt and shorts and then dashed into hers to get the same.
Samantha would ask a question here or there, as we both stripped down. I'm not sure if it was habit, but she dried me off and then went over to the couch to dry herself. The questions continued as we both dressed and she once again resumed her place on my lap, as my past with both girls was laid bare to her.
Before either of us realized it, the sun had climbed over the ridge and was peaking into the day room and by then I was thinking about Shannon's funeral, Samantha pretty much knew the rest.
"Go to bed and sleep in. I fully intend to, once I've left a message with work that I won't be in today."
"That is one order I will gladly obey. Sleep well, my Master."
She had already turned and headed for her room, I swear that girl swung those hips of hers just a bit more than she had earlier.
I'm not even sure what woke me, just one of those feelings perhaps. Many years ago, Frankie was with Shannon and I, while my brother and Marci took a cruise. Frankie wasn't well. One of those twenty-four hour bugs that float around from time to time. Even though Shannon and I are sound sleepers, both of us woke instantly when we sensed that something wasn't right and just made it to her room in time to watch her be sick on the floor.
I cleaned up while Shannon calmed a six-year-old Frankie after she had freaked out, not knowing what was happening to her. It was one of those moments. I woke sensing something was different in the cabin, it was then I heard crying. Samantha was knelt at the end of my bed, the tears streamed down her face. Even as my body moved to reach out to her, Samantha held up her hand to stop me.
"Please, my Master. Last night I heard from your lips such a tale of love and I envied each of you. I have thought long and hard and this is my choice."
Even as she said that, her arms extended so they took in the whole cabin, she blushed as her eyes once again settled on me, her words were calm and even, as though rehearsed.
"I know I have to be punished for my actions over these last months. But this I give as my word, although I cannot equal my sisters, in my own way, my heart tells me I can aspire to be as good as them both someday."
Again, her eyes rose to meet mine, not in defiance. Samantha wanted to make a point.
"Your choice of a safe word for me is Rosebud. If I can ask but one thing from you, can you punish me after we have made love? I've missed your touch so much, and I need that to carry me over the pain I will endure for treating the status you gave me so shabbily."
Even now, I still felt the urge to make sure she knew precisely what she was letting herself in for.
"Take these words and keep them close to your heart. You are on probation; this is your last chance Samantha. You fuck this up and there is no second chance out there for you to grab hold of. All three girls came into our version of this lifestyle with their eyes wide open, they knew what was required of them and all accepted that. There is no compromise, you won't be earning, Samantha. You came here and pissed over all the chances you will ever have. You're running on empty young lady and for some time to come, it's going to be all uphill."