Imagine There's Still Love Ch. 03byEdgarJames34©
Jon was not really surprised to find Lucy in the bedroom when he woke up, but he was startled to see she had pulled the brocade ottoman up to the foot of the bed and was sitting there with her knees pulled up to her chest and staring at him. She was wearing one of her yellow flowing spring dresses, and she looked like a princess perched on the stool. He had purchased the hassock as a spanking stool for her some years before, but it had been relegated to a place in the corner of the bedroom for storing extra sweaters and leggings. He knew she saw the startled look on his face, but her eyes were cast in a strange illusion of apprehension. What was she thinking? What had happened out there in the orchard? Had she taken the first step toward a lifestyle change he had been begging for and dreaming of for years, or was it just another tease to remind him of what he could never really have?
Did her sitting on that spanking stool have some significant meaning? And her expression was laced with certain...what? Unease? She looked just a little like the moment so many years ago when contractions had started in earnest before their first daughter was born. Where was that other woman, the woman who made him get the willow switch? She looked like the same beautiful woman from a few hours before, but those were not the same powerful eyes.
"How long have I been asleep?" he asked as he yawned and stretched out under the thin comforter.
"A little more than two hours. Apparently a good switching takes it out of you."
Was there a hint of laughter in her voice?
"I suppose," he said anxiously. "How long have you been watching me?"
"Just a few minutes...I've been checking in on you for more than an hour though. How are you? Does your bottom hurt?"
"Not too bad," he replied as he reached down and caressed the back of his thighs. "I can feel some tender spots on the back of my legs."
"Let me see."
Her manner changed in an instant to caregiver as she scampered off the stool and scurried around the end of the bed to sit on the edge beside him. She pulled the cover off in a rush, and Jon quickly covered his groin with his hand as he rolled to his side.
"Still hard for me, I see," she said in a quiet seductive voice. "That's so sweet."
Who was she? Mother? Lover? Mean hard hearted dominant bitch? She seemed to be all of those things, and none of them. It was so frustrating and so confusing for a man trying to discover his submissive self.
Her fingers quickly caressed the long faint purple welts on backs of his legs, and the sensitivity made his body shiver. After a moment she began to probe and separate the cheeks of his ass, caressing the warm fleshy parts of his bottom. He struggled to not let himself be embarrassed by his wife of more than thirty years inspecting him so intimately, but it was not easy. He breathed in deeply and allowed the tension to escape as he exhaled.
And strangely, with that breath, a sense of wellbeing floated and settled gently over him.
"You just lay there and I'll get some aloe," she said, and he felt the bed move as she got up.
And lay there he did, basking in a glow of consciousness that touched his heart and soul in that moment. Was this the sub-space he had read about? It felt wonderful, and he longed for the sensation to never end. When she returned, the overwhelming thrill of belonging tickled every part of him as she carefully spread the gel on his legs and bottom.
"Spread your legs baby," she said softly.
He spread his legs, hating the way the embarrassment invaded his mind and disturbed the pleasure of the mental and physical relaxation he was immersed in. She touched the areas of his inner thighs and groin. Was there any damage from the switch down there? He was rather mortified to ask and too aroused and mentally numb to overly care.
"Spread them farther," she prodded.
This time she pulled his near leg over until he was very exposed. He moved his far leg over as well, and knew that his anus was on full display. The exposure aroused him, but somehow it also comforted him even more.
"That's good," she stretched up and whispered near his ear. "Now I can get to the really delicate areas."
He felt her finger toy with the pucker of his anus, then along the crease of his cheeks, then back to his anus. When her finger wiggled into his hole he took another deep breath. It had been a long time since she had done anything like that to him. When they were younger she did it occasionally; when she wanted to make him cum quickly.
"Will you enjoy it when I fuck you there?"
Jon could only groan in response. He could not believe she had said that. He could not even believe she had used that word. He was so consumed by the moment and arousal however, that the shock was really no surprise at all. Damn but his mind was in a turbulent swirl of emotions. Was this real or a dream?
"Maybe another time." She patted his butt as eased away from him as she sat back up. "Right now we need to talk. Roll over and sit up for me."
Jon struggled to make the mental and emotional shift. He did not want to give up the hint of his heart's desire, but he complied slowly and hesitantly. He was confused and conflicted. He did not want the pleasure to end, and was also anxious about his wife seeing that his erection was even harder after her attention. It was so hard, as they say, that a cat could not scratch it. It stood up so proud that it was almost painful as he sat up on the bed.
But she did not even seem to notice.
"How are we doing?" she asked, her eyes piercing and her nostrils flaring slightly. "How do you feel about us right now?"
"I have never felt closer to you than I do right now." His head dipped a little as he spoke.
"So we're okay right now?"
"We're perfect right now," he replied quietly.
"So you're not planning on leaving me?"
"I was never..."
"Don't lie to me." Her voice gained an octive.
"I was just...I don't know...exploring my options." He hung his head.
"So is that what this means?" she asked, gesturing with a nod of her head toward his shaft as she reached over and began to stroke it. "Is this what perfect between us means to you?"
"My heart and my head and my soul belong to you right now."
"But is that how I am supposed to tell if everything is all right between us? Is this the measuring device?"
She squeezed his hard cock and rubbed her thumb over the head several times. Jon closed his eyes and groaned. When he forced his eyes open again, it felt for a moment that they might stay crossed forever.
"Yes...no...I'm not sure," he mumbled.
"You're going to have to do better than that," she snapped.
When he recovered from the shock of her response, he found himself looking deep into those eyes. She was nervous and anxious, but there was also a deep well of intense determination in those dark blue pools. The woman with the switch was not far beneath the surface.
"Of course there's more to it," he replied. "If you listened to me, you would know that."
She shook her head slowly and frowned, pulling her hand away from his erection.
"I've been listening to you for more than thirty years. What have you been telling me? What you want from me? What you want me to do for you? All about you, it seems. That's why I switched you today. I had to. It was the only way...for both of us."
"What do you mean?"
"You have been telling what you want, rather than what you are feeling. I had to figure out a way to get you to open up and be honest with me...and yourself. Today was a test for both of us. I know what I have to do now, and I proved to myself that I can do it. I cannot and will not allow you to be anything but completely truthful with me. I also will not allow you to deny me what I want. You have to allow me to grow into what works for me, and that means you tell me how you feel and I decide what to do about it."
Her voice was gaining strength, the words beginning to tumble from her, those eyes of that powerful woman emerging.
"I understand the reason I have resisted you for so long...the reason I have not given you what you asked for. I never believed it was more than a silly game. You wanted to play at this...to control me in the way that I control you. You want to top from the bottom. You wanted to tell what to do, rather than tell me how you feel."
Jon felt his mouth fall open just a bit and he fought to close it. Was that true? Was she right? How did she know so much? He could not help but be in awe of her, just as he was in awe of how he felt. It was like she was looking into his soul, and those eyes were burning a hole through him. She was like that other woman.
"I found out today that I could be stronger than you," she went on. "I found out today that I could make you submit to me. From now on you will be completely honest with me. Any question I ask you will answer immediately and truthfully."
"But you threatened to leave me if I did not let you spank me. What kind of a test is that?"
"The perfect test, I would say. You do remember sending me the URL for Wives Spanking Husbands, don't you?"
"Well...I was just..."
"The truth, damnit," she yelled, standing up suddenly.
Jon blinked several times.
"Yes...I guess maybe I was just trying to get your attention."
"Well you got it husband. But the truth is that you were just trying to manipulate me, trying to tell me what to do. Isn't that right?" Her nostrils were flaring again.
He felt the warmth of embarrassment and swell of belonging again. It was so hard to think straight that it was almost like being drunk.
"I'm sorry," he replied gently. "I guess it seemed like a better idea than it really was."
"So can we agree that is an example of how fantasy does not equal reality?"
"So it would seem," he replied timidly.
"Good." She nodded and smiled a warm artificial smile at him. "I know that I am just a primary special education teacher...not a Director of International Logistics...but perhaps this can be the first of many lessons you will learn from me. Do not tell me a lie. If you do not want to be spanked, then do not suggest that you do."
He stared at her silently. She had four degrees, and two of them were Masters. He had but one degree in International business. He made a lot more money than her, but he had long ago come to grips with the fact that she was much smarter than he was. And most of all, especially in this case, she was right.
"Yes Ma'am?" she coached.
"Yes Ma'am," he replied.
"And you want this? You will submit to me?"
"I think so. I'm a little afraid of you right now."
He had never heard her laugh with such intensity. The sound was almost a challenge, and it did not take a long look into her eyes to know who was doing the laughing. The name Lucinda came to mind in that instant. She always hated to be called by her real given name, but that evil bad name somehow it fit her so much more than Lucy ever would.
"Well maybe you should be afraid," she seethed. "I'm not completely sure how this might change me, but I feel a deep primal energy surging up inside that I have not felt before and I'm not sure can be contained. A part of me was afraid to switch you, afraid you would say no and that would be the end of us. The other part of me was not afraid at all, and now she feels a closer bond with you than any time since we were married. You felt that too, didn't you...even though you did not enjoy being spanked?"
"Yes," he answered, amazed that she seemed to be describing just what he had felt. "But I'm not sure what she will expect of me...and like I said...I'm a little afraid of you."
"I know baby," she said softly. "But it's up to you now. If you say yes, then you are making new vows with that new woman. I promise that I will make every effort to excite you...to intrigue you...to challenge you and make you grow as a submissive. I promise this will never touch your career or your professional life. I promise that only those who need to know will ever learn about this unless you choose otherwise. And I promise that I will own you and dominate you."
He stared at her. Was he getting his dream? Or was he getting something else. Was he man enough to say yes to this? Was he brave enough to really touch the sharp edge of what she was offering?
"If you ever change your mind about this, and decide you want to go back, all you have to do is say, 'I want off the yellow brick road'. That will be our safe words. We will stop and decide where we go from there...if there is any chance for us to stay together. I think we both know that there probably won't be, but it will be your decision and that will be the chance you will have to take."
Jon felt a lump in his throat as he considered the finality of her words.
"Can we negotiate as we go?" he asked.
She slowly and solemnly began shaking her head.
"You will start a journal...online...write what is in your heart each day. I will consider what you have to tell me and decide what action I believe is right. This new me is not really interested in giving any power back to you through negotiation, but she loves you and will care for you. Some of what she will expect of you will be hard for you, but she will never demand more of you than she believes you can bear."
"I need to think about this," he finally answered.
The expression on her face was dire. She looked afraid, but she was also determined, and perhaps a little bit angry.
"I understand," she said. "Take as long as you like. Now get up...I have someone I want you to meet."
Lucy's eyes squinted into a frown, and he could tell she was not going to tell him. Was she challenging him to defy her? Was this more of a test? Did he dare refuse before he even decided? How could he be having so much trouble choosing what he thought he had wanted for so long?
He ambled off of the bed and stepped to his dresser. When he pulled the top drawer open, however, his mouth fell open.
"Where is my underwear?"
She laughed. And it was her; it was Lucinda. He did not even have to turn to look and see, did not have to see those eyes to know who was laughing at him.
"Your panties are right there," she said as her laughter softened. "Black ones...all satin...no lace...only the best panties for my man."
He could not help himself. As the words spilled from her mouth his cock rose and got even harder. What was wrong with him? Did he want to be feminized? Did he want to be humiliated? He had thought about those things, and they excited him, but he was never sure if he really wanted them. The virtual promise of them happening made him hard and even more excited, however.
"Now that's my good boy. That's how I know you're being trained right."
"You have been asking me to dominate you for a very long time. You do realize that will require you to be trained, don't you? You really aren't very knowledgeable about the details are you? I would have thought that you understood all of this already. Thank God I have someone who really knows what he's doing... someone who is teaching me how to do it right."
He turned and tried to frown at her. What did that mean?
"My new boyfriend," she answered his unasked question with a flittering chuckle. "We're going to visit him after you get your panties on. Now hurry up."
She clapped her hands twice and fluttered the back of her hand at him.
Jon suddenly felt like his head was in thick fog as he stared at her. Had he heard her right? Another man? Instantly his stomach churned with dread, just as his groin rejoiced with excitement. His thoughts were consumed by the memories of hundreds of fantasies about that very thing. Had he ever really thought of any of them coming true? Her eyes twinkled at him, her dimpled smile taunting him. What could he say?
"That got your attention, didn't it?" she said with a smirk.
She paused a moment, then Lucinda laughed out loud again.
"I wondered if you liked that. I thought maybe you did. Of course I'm just teasing...to see your reaction...maybe. He's actually a therapist, with a sort of special expertise in the area of dominant and submissive relationships. He's become a sort of councilor to me on this whole lifestyle change you have been begging me to consider."
Jon pulled a pair of panties from the drawer and held them up.
"Victoria Secret," she announced with glee. "Large...to make sure there is enough room."
"Room for what?" he mumbled.
"That." She smiled and pointed to his erection. "And of course...other things."
Other things? He was afraid to ask specifically what that might mean. Her laugh told him more than he was brave enough to face at that moment, but he was beyond arguing now. It felt like the momentum of years of wanting and hoping had built up behind him, pushing him off some cliff of wonderful ecstasy and absolute terror. He bent over, stepping one foot and then the other into his panties. When he pulled them up the sensation on his ass and the head of his hard penis was smooth as melting ice and deliciously wicked. When he looked at his beautiful wife her smile and the gleam in her eyes told him that everything was about to be perfectly unexpected with his world.
She turned and marched to the bedroom door, glancing over her shoulder to make sure he was behind her. There was a hint of nipples showing in the floral print of her dress where her firm B cup breast stretched the fabric as she turned. Lucy always wore a bra, but the vision left him in doubt this time. She also swished her dress as she pranced away, and for an instant he thought he detected the bare left cheek of her gorgeous ass.
He could not seem to do anything but fall in step behind her. He wanted to ask about her underwear, just as he wanted to ask if he could put more clothes on, but he sensed that both answers would be her harsh laughter or worse. What she was wearing was her business, and if she wanted him to put more clothes on then she would tell him to put more clothes on. And the deep dark hard truth was that it felt mentally glorious to just go along and do just as she wanted him to do. A portion of his psyche right then wanted to be directed and made to do anything and everything that the other part of his brain was arguing against.
Down the hall and into the kitchen he followed her. Where were they going? He knew her too well; she would never make him get in the car like this and visit some...what did she call him? Therapist?
She paused at the back door to the kitchen and motioned to the mudroom with her head.
"Get your flip-flops on," she ordered.
He quickly complied, and scurried along as she pulled the back door to the kitchen open and strode outside onto the patio. Jon followed dutifully along behind her out across the patio, through the orchard, and past the smoldering remains of the burn pile. He noted a hint of chill in the air, but was too consumed with passion for his wife to give it great consideration. What was he going to do about it, anyway? At the gate into the common area behind the house, she paused long enough to scan to play structure and the picnic tables. Probably making sure no children were around. With a nod, she pulled the gate open and proceeded through, once again glancing back over her shoulder to make sure he was still with her.
"Where are we going?" he finally asked, trying hard to keep the whine out of his voice as nervously trotted behind her.
"To Bill Stouder's place," she replied as she set a brisk pace along the stone path.
"The old man at the end of the commons?"
"He's the therapist?"
"He's a doctor of clinical psychology actually...but helping people is his passion. His wife died about ten years ago, and since then he specializes in helping people in this kind of relationship."