Mothers and Daughters Ch. 01

Vera Starikovich grew up in Crystal Springs, Mississippi, a small town just south of the state capital of Jackson. In July, in the year when she was still 13 years old, she realized that she was pregnant. Although very young and perhaps naive she nevertheless was savvy enough to ascertain her condition by herself. Because she had missed two periods, aware of being unduly nauseous and noticing her breasts and nipples were more sore and tender than usual; she bought a home pregnancy test which confirmed her suspicions.

Her first reaction was disgust as she had high ambitions for herself. She knew she was smart, and would do very well in high school and beyond. Unlike her female peers she loved mathematics; it was her easiest subject in school. She hated living in Crystal Springs. Her brains she felt, were her ticket out of town.

She envisioned winning some scholarships and with student loans she could get into university and perhaps become a professor of mathematics. Thereby she could enter into a sophisticated world which would be 180 degrees opposite the laid back rural tedium of life in Crystal Springs, MS.

"My brains! Shit!" thought Vera to herself, "What good were they?"

Here she was pregnant and she was not even in high school yet! Her brains did not come to her aid when she was seduced by the high school senior, who also happened to be the star quarterback of the high school team. She had foolishly acquiesced in losing her virginity to him by believing his bullshit lines that he actually loved her. Intellectually, she knew no one falls in love just by casually meeting in a public place like a café where she had gone to enjoy a milkshake. However that one Saturday afternoon in May, she lost all sense of reality and agreed to go for a ride to the countryside in a fancy convertible with Larry Grant, that senior football player she met in the café.

After that initial sexual intercourse in the countryside, he was no longer interested in seeing her. Vera could only think bitterly, "How foolish of me."

Although Vera was only thirteen years old she was very mature and wise for her age. She knew in the current society and mores, her pregnancy did not have to mean the end of her starry-eyed ambitions. Her parents and part of the society in general would have no objections to an abortion, but Vera could not countenance that. She was definitely pro life in thought, word and deed.

However, Vera did have problems with her other very viable option; i.e. giving birth then surrendering her baby for adoption. The pro arguments for such choice were very persuasive. Even she would concede she was too young and immature to be a proper mother to her baby. The adoptive couple would be without a doubt in a better financial position to raise her child. They would also love her child as their own and would give just as much love if not even more than she could, to the child. Yes she would have to admit her child would be better off raised by a well to do couple. Actually being a white girl giving birth to a healthy white child gave her a significant advantage to "sell" her child to a desperate couple who could not have a baby other than by adoption. She knew then that she could realistically advance her ambitions by consulting a lawyer and contracting a private adoption for substantial financial gain.

Her own character though, went counter to these empirically sensible arguments. Vera believed one must accept the consequences of one's own actions. Yes she could rail against the father of her child for seducing her, but then again she was not raped. Yes she was young and immature, but still she knew enough, of the possible consequences of engaging in unprotected sex. Yet she went ahead and indulged her passion.

Therefore she believed she had no choice but to put her own ambitions aside and to devote her energy to provide the best outcome for her baby. To this end she first approached the father of her child, Larry Grant, to apprise him of her situation. Not surprisingly, Larry reacted like a typical male stud inundated with various female claims to him. He exclaimed, "Oh yeah slut? How do I know you are really pregnant? Besides how do I know I'm the father? Am I just supposed to take your word for it?"

Vera patiently responded, "Well Larry, when I give birth to a child that will be the ultimate proof that I was pregnant. No doubt subsequent blood tests will confirm you are the father of my child. I can say this much: I have had up to now only one sexual experience capable of resulting in childbirth and you were the other participant. My only question to you is what are your intentions? I swear the facts that I've revealed to you are absolutely true."

Larry Grant was no fool. He sensed that Vera was no bimbo whom he could easily bamboozle, although he remembered with chagrin that he had no trouble seducing her. Thus he responded in a more pragmatic fashion, "Look Vera, I'm going to start my senior year at high school where I'll be the quarterback for the school football team; and I'm good. I have realistic scholarship chances for Old Miss as well as Mississippi State, LSU, Tulane Alabama and Auburn, not to mention some Florida and Texas schools, that I have applied for. Having a pregnant girlfriend will put a kibosh on such opportunities. Besides you are too young to be a mother- by the way how old are you anyway?"

"Thirteen."

Larry gasped inwardly at that response as he was cognizant of the implications of statutory rape. Thus he carefully responded, "Right, well there you have it. You are definitely too young to be a mother, and I'm certainly not ready to be a father. So I have a solution."

"Oh yeah? Pray tell what is your solution?"

"Obviously abortion is the only answer. To avoid scandal I can come up with $2,500 by tomorrow plus a bus ticket to Chicago. I'll drive you to the bus station in Jackson. The $2,500 will be plenty for you to obtain an abortion from Planned Parenthood or an abortion clinic in Chicago, a stay at a decent hotel for a few days and compensate you for your inconveniences plus allow you to come back. By going away so far to Chicago, you and I will avoid the inevitable rumors in this town and no one will be the wiser."

Vera responded, "OK that does sound like a reasonable solution, but how about $5,000? I feel my inconveniences are a little more costly."

Larry was relieved to obtain Vera's immediate consent. The extra money was no problem as his father was rather well off, being the owner among other things, of a chain of supermarkets throughout the south. Larry knew he could get that kind of money from his father in order to preserve his scholarship chances and avoid any disagreeable criminal charges should Vera turn out to be nasty. So Larry replied, "Great that's being sensible. I'm sure you can come up with some excuse to your parents why you will be gone for a few days. I'll pick you up at 12:00 noon tomorrow, and take you to Jackson. I believe the bus leaves for Chicago at about a quarter to two."

Vera quipped, "Wow you know the bus schedule Larry? Have you had occasion to send others away to Chicago?"

Unbeknownst to Vera, but she was actually right on target with that barb. Larry's sister, Mary who was sixteen, had also found herself pregnant about one month earlier and their father went ballistic at the news. He insisted Mary get an abortion; Mary was not averse to such a d⁹emand. He was most concerned about avoiding scandal so he insisted that Mary go sufficiently far away like Chicago for her abortion. However he was truly incensed with his daughter and declared that she did not deserve a convenient plane trip to Chicago. Instead she would have to endure a bus trip to contemplate her sins. Thus, Larry took his sister to the Jackson bus station just a month previous and that is why he was able to so quickly come up with such a similar proposal when confronted by Vera.

He merely responded, "I happened to have taken my sister to the Jackson bus station a month ago for a vacation to visit some relatives we have in Chicago. I will check with the bus station to make certain of the schedule and if it has changed I will let you know. Otherwise just be ready by 12:00 tomorrow."

"I'll be ready just you make sure you have the money."

"I'll have the money."

Although Vera Starikovich was only thirteen years of age, she was able to react maturely to her situation. She harbored no ill feelings towards Larry Grant as she realized that he only acted like a typical teenage male; i.e. get into the pants of a girl and once success is achieved to move on.

She was embarrassed that she had not been strong enough to resist his obvious seduction ploys, but she was flattered by Larry's interest in her and so let herself naively believe in the idea of having fallen in love. She had been in a fog of love for approximately three days after the loss of her virginity but as he had refused all of her overtures for follow-up dates, she quickly faced reality. She was steeling herself to move on in her life, but of course her resultant pregnancy changed things.

She contacted Larry first even before an official confirmation of her pregnancy by a medical doctor. She wanted to ascertain his position so that she could plan accordingly. The reason she wanted to know how he would react to her pregnancy was because she already knew how, or at least she had a pretty good idea of how her parents would react to her pregnancy.

Vera came from a large Russian immigrant family; she had four older sisters, one younger sister and three younger brothers, so she was the absolute middle child. Two years previously one of her older sisters, Anna who was then 15, got pregnant and her parents forced her to undergo an abortion even though Anna wanted to give birth and was prepared to put her child up for adoption.

Although Vera believed herself to be stronger in character than her sister she knew that at her age she could not confront and defy her parents. After all her inner debate, she decided that she wanted to keep her child and raise it, but her strongest obstacle would be her parents.

In her mind there were three possible reactions Larry could have upon learning of her pregnancy. First of all he could have accepted his responsibilities as a father. No one would demand that he must marry her; the old fashioned shotgun wedding solution was now passé even in Mississippi. However he could agree to help provide for the child to the best of his abilities, and be there for the child. He might wish to partake in lots of custodial visits, and have a say on the rearing of the child. With such an attitude on Larry's part, Vera felt certain she would induce her parents to acquiesce in the birth of their grandchild.

The second reaction Larry could have had, was to stonewall her and deny any responsibility. This reaction would possibly be even better for her purposes. If it turned out that notwithstanding the home pregnancy test and her other indicators of pregnancy, she was against odds not pregnant; then this was a no harm no foul situation as no legal action would need to be taken on her part until pregnancy was confirmed. Of course she knew that if she was pregnant then only Larry could be the father. With modern blood tests she knew that the paternity of her child would be easily established. She was also well aware of statutory rape laws (she had looked up such information in the public library as soon as she suspected she was pregnant) and knew that this would be a significant bargaining chip in any legal action against Larry.

Vera did not wish any undue hardship to befall on Larry. However the legal jeopardy in which he found himself would be a persuasive argument for her parents to allow her to give birth. Her parents she knew were neither good nor bad but were nevertheless prone to seek comeuppance. They were considered by most to be white thrash, and being immigrants from Russia were truly outcasts to decent society in Crystal Springs. So Vera thought her father would probably love to stick it to a well respected family like the Grants. But of course to embarrass the Grants it would be necessary for her parents to allow Vera to give birth and of course this was her sole objective in this mess.

Unfortunately the third possible reaction by Larry, which was the actual case, was the most unfavorable for her desires. He acknowledged paternity but was offering the "ideal" solution and was even willing to pay for it; i.e. abortion. Her main problem was that her parents would not be her ally in such circumstance. She already could envision her father pacing on the floor of the living room and exclaiming, 'What's the matter with you girl? He is ready to send you to Chicago where you can have an abortion probably under the best medical supervision possible. He is even willing to throw some extra money at you so you can have some fun while in the big city. You'll be able to return in time to enter your first year of high school without any hindrance to your future. And I know you girl; you have high ambitions for yourself. All in all Larry is offering you the out you need to fulfill your desires.'

What was more devastating to Vera was that she could offer no cogent or rational never mind persuasive argument to counter the common sense of Larry's offer for abortion. She just felt in her bones that it was not right to acquiesce to an abortion nor was it right to give up the baby for adoption.

She was at first despondent at Larry's reaction but she latched on to the most insignificant feature of his offer; he was providing transportation for her to Chicago. Now it dawned on Vera that if she returned from Chicago with child in hand "they" (parents and others) no longer could get rid of her child. Yes "they" might argue for giving the child up for adoption but she intuitively felt that once her parents saw her child for real they would not be so ready to give up an actual grandchild.

When Larry initially offered her money she knew that he was prepared to pay more. She also knew there was a legitimate limit that he could not go beyond. She quickly calculated in her mind that he was probably willing to go at least twice his initial offer and that was probably enough for her to stay in Chicago until the baby was born. With all those thoughts in her mind she was quickly able to seal the bargain with Larry. Of course Larry was expecting her to obtain an abortion and he would have cause to grumble when she returned to Crystal Springs with a child, but that would be his problem. She would have no desire to shake him down for more money and so it would be up to him as to how much he would want to be in the child's life.

With these thoughts in mind she packed a huge suitcase that provided for about ten days of clothing. In addition to the suitcase she was traveling with a violin. Her parents immigrated to the United States in the 1960's and the only significant possession that her father brought with him was this violin. This instrument was commissioned and created for his great-great grandmother, Olga Podkopayeva, by special order of Tsar Alexander II who was enthralled by her playing of the violin at Court. This violin was a most precious family heirloom indeed, and no doubt was worth a great deal of money for its remarkable collective value. No one in the family since Olga had played the instrument until Vera came along.

Vera was not a proficient however. When she turned nine, she started taking periodic lessons in violin playing so that she was capable of playing the priceless instrument adequately. She found it soothing to calm her nerves to pick up the violin and play something. However, it was understood in the family that this violin would be made available to the person in the family who could match the ability of the original owner; i.e. Olga. Vera knew she was not that person but as she was only going to be gone from the family temporarily and since none of her sibs had the ability never mind the inclination to play this instrument, she felt it was not out of order for her to take this valuable violin along with her to Chicago. She knew that playing the violin would lift her spirits during her melancholy self imposed exile.

When Larry came to pick her up the next day, and saw her toting the violin, he was alarmed and suspicious. So he asked, "⁹Hey! What's with the violin? You are only going to be gone a few days why lug it along?"

"I am grateful for your $5,000 but I can easily spend it all away in Chicago, and I do want to keep some of this money. The violin gives me something to do while I am there, without spending too much money."

Larry bought the explanation and moved onto a different subject, "What did you tell your parents?"

"My best friend, Courtney, has parents who own property right on the beach near Gulfport. Courtney spends her summer vacations there and I have a standing invitation to come join her. So I told my parents you are driving me there to spend a few days and that Courtney will arrange for me to return. Her parents do not socialize with mine so they will not check up on me. Besides I spent some time there last summer and I was intending to go there in August anyway."

"Well looks like you've got the situation under control. So let me know when you expect to be back and I'll pick you up at the bus station if you can't get another ride."

"Sure thing Lar."

In Jackson, they stopped at a bank as Vera got Larry to convert $4,500 into travelers' checks. That way Vera had only $500 in actual cash on her person. Lost on Larry was how sophisticated and mature Vera was in handling the situation. Had he contemplated the matter in this light he might have realized that Vera had no intention of getting an abortion.

When Vera boarded the crowded bus, there was only one available seat that was not accompanied by a male. So she seated herself there after obtaining the obligatory consent from her seating companion. Now Vera, unlike most of her friends and family for that matter, did not have a racist bone in her body and this became patently obvious to her companion who was a strikingly good looking African American woman. As a result, Ruth Williams quickly warmed up to Vera and the two of them easily conversed throughout the trip.

Ruth had been to New Orleans to attend her father's funeral. She had had an estranged and a strange relationship with her father. He had left her mother before she was born. Ruth met him for the first time at her mother's funeral in Chicago ten years ago when she was fifteen years old; her mother had died prematurely of breast cancer. Her parents had never got around to divorcing and kept in touch with each other but there had never been any reconciliation. By keeping in touch, he was aware of his wife's death, and was able to attend the funeral to Ruth's surprise.

It was awkward to say the least for Ruth to meet her father for the first time on such an occasion. However, her mother had never bad mouthed him throughout the years so she did not distain him as she might have otherwise reacted. After the funeral, Ruth and her father established a long distance and distant relationship, since he lived in New Orleans while she lived in Chicago. They corresponded and talked on the phone occasionally. She visited him three times in New Orleans during that time until his recent death. Because she was afraid of flying, she always travelled by bus and was now very familiar with the bus route.

During those ten years she learned that her father had stayed in love with his wife but left her because he could not handle her promiscuity. Ruth did not doubt her father's allegation of her mother's promiscuity as she sure was cognizant of the variety of men her mother entertained in their home.

As a result, Ruth had six half-sisters: Jasmine now 24, Kiara 22, Raven 20, Ebony 17, Sherilyn 16 and Alisha 14. Every one of her sisters had a different father but since their mother never divorced her father, all of her sisters had the same surname of Williams.