My Sarah Ann Ch. 04

I've been in a lot of bad relationships. I've been with a lot of women who went out of their way to emasculate me at every turn. I generally just took it too; allowing the hurt and regret to build up over time until the sum total destroyed whatever good there once might have been. I've never felt comfortable being vulnerable before, because I know that the sort of women I dated would use it to their advantage some point down the line. I never felt comfortable until now.

Sarah is trust to me. She is the living embodiment of everything a woman should be. Kind and nurturing and warm, but still with a streak of strong independence that never gives in. Sarah is her own woman, and gives herself completely only when she chooses to do so. I am a lucky man to have been the subject of that choice, because it gives me things I didn't know I even need.

I am laying on the bed when Sarah comes and sits beside me. I am laying face down, my arms folded under my head. I feel her soothing hands on my back, gently caressing my skin. Goosebumps raise along the lines of her stroke, I am eased and comforted by her loving grace. Her hands work with more pressure, easing the knots out of my tired muscles and nurturing my soul at the same time. I feel completed by her touch, in a way I never felt before. She gently massages my back, working her fingers sinuously and carefully. She rubs upwards on my sides, healing my aches as she goes. My body relaxes completely and I feel safe and warm under her touch.

I hear the bottle of oil click open and tense slightly, waiting to feel the warm oil on my skin. She dribbles a line down my back and starts rubbing it into me, her hands sliding with easy pressure across me. The baby oil smell sweet and innocent somehow, it makes me feel at ease as she oils up my skin and massages out my tension. I am calmed by her touch, soothed by the oil. Her hands slide lower and she spills out more oil, this time between my ass cheeks, it is slippery and drips down along my skin. Sarah starts to massage my ass slowly, giving me time to acclimate. This was a part of my body I never wanted touched before, but now the sense of trust I feel with Sarah makes me want to drop old barriers and hangups. I want to feel everything with her.

I tense slightly at first, feeling nervous about her touch. Her hands are gentle and yet still firm. She is confident in her touch, showing me wordlessly that it's okay to enjoy what she is doing. I feel her fingers slide briefly between my cheeks, she knows I want this but I need to take time, my fears linger still even though my desire burns so strongly. I close my eyes and allow her to work on me; her hands slide along my thighs and tease my balls. She slips one finger between my cheeks and calmly massages oil against my ass. I shudder with the combination of nervousness and excitement. Her touch is gentle and feels good, I feel my shame dissolve as she slowly relaxes me.

"It's okay baby. I love you, just relax and enjoy it. It's alright to enjoy this." Her voice is lyrical and soothing, she makes me give over my fears with her gentle confidence. I am filled with the anticipation of these new sensations. I have never done any thing like this before, I am so excited to let myself be pleasured in this way. I feel more oil pour out onto me and she spreads my ass softly to let it drip down. Her finger moves with more pressure now, just slightly penetrating me. I hear her soothing tones as she slips the finger into me. I am filled with confused feelings, lust and fear all bundled into one. I fear she won't respect me after this, but I have to know. I feel dirty and exposed and vulnerable, but feeling that way with Sarah makes it okay, thrilling even. I feel like I can do anything with her.

Sarah pushes her finger in deeper now, massaging my prostate with her fingertip and running her other hand over my back. She is relaxing and exciting me at the same time now, my cock throbs against my abdomen with lust. Resting her palm on my butt, she wiggles her finger inside of me and continues to shush and reassure me. She knows what I need, she knows without my having to say. I love my Sarah so much.

There is no pain as she withdraws her finger and returns with a second. I feel her soft skin press into my flesh and spread me open. I gasp with surprise, there is pleasure with the anxiety now, pleasure and a sense of completion. I've gotten this far and she shows no signs of distaste or disapproval. She slowly works me open with her fingers, still stroking my oiled back and kissing gently on my neck. I reach out and feel the artificial cock between her thighs. The straps make exciting dimples in her lush flesh, I slide my hand over the shaft, testing and curious. While still softly fingering my ass, she pours a small amount of oil over the toy and my hand, allowing me to lubricate the shaft. I look up hesitantly, she stares down lovingly, I feel her acceptance in her gaze. She understands, there is nothing to fear, I know I can give myself over to Sarah and there will be nothing to fear.

"Baby, I'm ready." I say it quietly and meekly. I'm still a little afraid, even after all our discussion, I'm a bit afraid to admit I want this. She smiles knowingly, withdrawing her fingers carefully and positioning herself behind me.

"It's okay, I'm going to be gentle. I promise." I feel her place the tip of her phallus against me and I try to relax. She leans in to softly kiss my lips in reassurance. "Just say when sweetie." I look into her eyes for a moment, a knowing glance is exchanged and she understands. I feel the tip begin to spread me open and she stops, waiting for the resistance to fade. I close my eyes and breathe deeply; it is now or never. I feel myself start to surrender and she slides in a bit more. I am tense and nervous but trusting enough to allow this violation of my body. There is pleasure with the strange sensation of penetration, Sarah is slow and careful as she pushes inside of me for the first time. Inch by inch I feel it get easier, eventually her breasts come into contact with my slick back. I feel her belly press against me and I know that she is buried inside me. "See baby. It's okay. I still love you."

My whole body suddenly relaxes completely. I feel her love against me, I feel her understanding as she holds the toy inside me and waits for me to be ready. I pull forward a little, feeling the shaft slide slightly out of my ass. It is a strange sensation, but somehow comforting as well. I feel taken and vulnerable, but I know it's okay because it's my Sarah. Nobody loves me like my Sarah, and now I know that for certain.

"Baby, go slow, okay?" I am a little more certain now, empowered by her patience and love. She starts to rock her hips gently, moving the toy ever so slightly inside me. I feel a deep sense of surrender. I feel like Sarah owns me in that moment, and she is treating me with the care and love that I need so badly. I feel my trust grow as she slowly makes me hers in this most intimate way. My pleasure begins to grow as I get used to the feeling of her strap on sliding in and out of me gently. We rock like that for a while, her hands cradling me gently. I push back to feel her body against me, raising up slightly and giving her better access to fuck me softly. My surrender is complete; I feel my cock pulsing with her thrusts. There is more pleasure than I expected, I feel a warmth growing inside me as the dildo rubs against my engorged prostate.

Sarah reaches around me and grasps my throbbing cock in one oily hand. Her grip is soft and loving, she tenderly slides her hand over my head in time with her strokes. The mixture of sensations is a little dizzying, I moan openly as she pleasures me dually. She senses my increased pleasure and starts to speed her hips ever so slightly. She is careful not to hurt me, satisfying my trust and my need without making me feel at risk in any way. Her touch is gentle and soothing, she understands so well why I need this and how to fill that need. I start rocking in time with her, she stills her hand so I can thrust into it myself. I slowly work my cock towards orgasm with her loving hand.

"Is it good baby?" Her question is almost rhetorical, she knows that I am enjoying this, but she needs to hear it too.

"Yes Sarah. It is. It's so good, please don't stop." She works her hips for me, reveling in the unfamiliar pleasure of being the penetrating partner. I give myself over to her power and her love, she satisfies that with incredible tenderness. I hear her breathing is quick, she is enjoying this almost as much as I am. I pump my cock a little harder into her hand, I feel her grip tighten, she knows I must be close. I feel her speed her hips just a little more, fucking me with more abandon. Somehow she knows just how quickly to move, never exceeding my ability to take her thrusts.

I start to shake with lust. I can feel my orgasm approaching quickly and I know I can't hold off this time. Sarah tightens her hand and begins to work it harder; she bottoms out against me and holds her body against mine. I lose control and cry out her name with what I would have previously thought was embarrassing volume. I want to give over to the moment though, there is no shame now, only pleasure and trust and acceptance. My cock explodes as I cry out powerfully, Sarah works her hand on my head, containing my cum and rubbing it over me with each pump. I shudder in release and spasm into her hand, my ass clenches hard on the shaft filling me so obscenely. Eventually I am spent and collapse underneath her. Sarah gently withdraws the toy and lays beside me. I curl up against her, resting my head on her breast and sobbing softly.

"Sarah. You still love me, right?" For one terrifying moment I feel like I've gone too far. I feel like she must be filled with disgust at my undignified display of fetishistic abandon.

"Of course baby. I'll always love you. I'll always respect you too." She holds me close to her breast and allows my sobs of relief to subside. I feel her loving grasp, it hasn't changed even a bit. Sarah still loves me, she still respects me and she still considers me her man. I love her with all of my soul, I have never been so completely surrendered to another human being. I am the luckiest man alive.