On the Other Hand Ch. 01-02

I sat back and thought about what to do next. I wanted to see pictures of these women to at least weed out the ones that I wouldn't want to be seen with in public. After that, I would need a strategy to decide where next to go with my quest. All the while, of course, I was still going to work each day and so the entire process was left to my evenings and weekends.

I set up my digital camera on a tripod, put it on ten second delay, and took a picture of myself. I had a black Lone Ranger style mask that I used at a Halloween party a couple of years ago and put it on, hopefully to avoid recognition if by chance one of the respondents knew me. I took a couple of pictures with me wearing a navy blue t-shirt and jeans. I tried a pose with my hands on my hips and then with my hands in my pockets, but went with the first option when I saw the results.

I sent a short e-mail with my picture attachment out with a request from each of the eleven to return a current photo of theirs. I was using a new mail address on Yahoo, along with a pen name, leftyscribe. Yeah, I know, not very original. Interestingly, I only got eight replies and only six of them included a picture. Two more disqualified.

A couple of the pictures were very explicit and I dumped them from the candidates. It wasn't that they didn't have a nice body, I just didn't need to see all of it before we were even introduced. That left me with four women. I went over their responses and photos and decided to make contact with them. I sent KittyKat an e-mail giving her some more of my personal details and suggesting she use Skype to contact me during the evening hours. I had updated my Skype account with the photo I had sent them and waited for a reply.

There was no guarantee that KittyKat had Skype, but it was a free download and it would give us an opportunity to talk and maybe even see each other on line without giving away any personal information. My laptop had a built-in camera and with luck, she might have one as well.

KittyKat called about eight o'clock that evening and I was pleased that she did have a camera so that we could communicate visually.

"Hi ... are you leftyscribe?" she asked cautiously.

"That's me, but why don't you call me Will and I'll call you Kitty, if that's okay?"

"Yeah. Sure. So, you look okay," she said, still being very careful. "At least you look like the picture you sent."

"You do too, Kitty. So tell me about yourself."

"Uhhm ... well ... I have a job, I live in Midland, I rent an apartment with another girl, I'm 34, divorced, no kids. You can see I look okay. What else?"

"Well, for me, being left-handed is a big thing. Are you?"

"Uhhm ... no, actually. I thought that was something you were just kidding about."

"No ... in fact ... it's a deal-breaker, sorry to say. You're quite attractive, Kitty. I'm sure you'll find a guy who's right for you, but I'm not him. Sorry."

"Yeah. Me too. You sound like an okay guy. Some of the guys who are looking for women are real creeps."

"I'll bet. Well, you be careful now. Protect yourself and be as sure as you can be before you let them get to see you live and in person."

"Yeah, thanks. Sorry it didn't work out," she said, sounding genuinely regretful.

Well, one down, three to go. Who's next?

"Hi steadfast, this is leftyscribe. Too bad you don't have a camera on your computer so we could see each other live."

"Actually, I do have a webcam. I just didn't turn it on."

"How come?"

"I'm nervous. I don't know you and I don't want to take any unnecessary chances."

"Okay, I can understand that. But here's something to consider. You could be anywhere in the world and I wouldn't know where. I don't know your name, so I can't look you up. That gives you some protection."

"I suppose. I'd rather be safe than sorry, though."

"Okay, let's get some details. Are you left-handed?"

"Yes. What's with that, anyway?"

"It's a thing I have about compatibility. We lefties live in a very different world than the other ninety percent. I think two left-handed people are more likely to think and act alike than a mixed couple."

"Yeah ... I guess I get that. What about your job? Do you have one?"

"Yeah. I'm not a struggling writer trying to write the next great American novel. I work for a newspaper and write some for TV too."

"Oh yeah. Okay, that sounds all right. Is that really you in the picture?"

"Yeah, that's really me, the Lone Ranger."

"Ha ha. I guess you're being careful too," she said, sounding a little less cautious.

"Yes. This is all new to me ... Internet dating I mean."

"So ... what else do you want to know about me?"

"Do you play bridge?"

"No. I've never learned. I could, I guess ... if it was important."

"It's not a killer thing. You look nice in your picture. It's recent, I take it?"

"Well, about two years ago. Not much has changed since then."

"Okay ... well, my real name is Will. What should I call you?"

"Sam. My friends call me Sam."

"Okay, Sam. Well, should we arrange to meet for coffee and get to know each other a little better?"

"Uhhm ... I guess so. Would it be all right if I brought a friend along with me?"

"I suppose. I know what you're thinking. You don't know me at all so you're being careful. I can understand that."

"So when and where do you want to meet?"

"How about Saturday afternoon at the Starbucks on Kildare Road?"

"Okay. Two o'clock?"

"Two o'clock it will be," I said, anxious now to find out if I was on the right track.

"Okay, bye."

"Bye, Sam. Nice talking to you. See you Saturday."

I leaned back in my chair and let my breath out. I might have been as nervous as she was. Calm down, Will. She may be the one, but then again, maybe not. Take your time and think about how you want the meeting to go.

With only a picture to guide me, I had to be careful when I approached Sam to make sure it was her and not someone else. I was there before her as far as I could tell, so I kept an eye out for her arrival. I shouldn't have worried. I recognized her right away. She was extremely attractive ... for someone about six-foot-eight tall.

"Hi, I'm Will," I said, rising to greet her and trying to smile genuinely as I looked up at her.

"Hi, Will, I'm Sam. Samantha, actually. I can see you're surprised. I guess I should have mentioned that I was tall."

"Well, let's not let that get in the way of anything," I said, wondering what in the hell I was trying to say. "Where's your friend?"

"I decided to take a chance. You sounded okay on the Internet, so I figured out here in broad daylight I should be okay."

I bought her a Chai tea while I splurged on a latté. We sat, finding it awkward to begin, but gradually working toward telling each other about ourselves. She was an extremely attractive woman and if I allowed the little head to do the thinking again, I might have ignored that fact that there was no spark between us. Nothing at all. It was a shame, really. She was left-handed and in the short time we chatted I could tell she was very bright, but beyond that nothing was happening.

"This isn't going anywhere, is it?" she said after a silence.

"I don't think so, Sam. I'm sorry. You really are a very lovely woman and very desirable. I've half a mind to suggest we date and see if anything develops. Maybe we're expecting too much too soon."

"No ... truth time, Will. I'm too tall for you. I need someone closer to my own size. It would always be awkward for both of us. I like you and I think we could be good friends, but I don't think it would be anything more than that."

I nodded. Inescapable logic. We'd be the odd couple and it would make us uncomfortable, likely her more than me. There are plenty of tall guys out there that would be delirious to have her as a girlfriend ... or more.

We parted and I felt mildly upset that I wasn't more confident that we could have made it. Two down, two to go.

ScorpionLady turned out to be a black-haired woman about my age whose name was Lou. I guessed it was short for Louise. She didn't have a camera and thought that if we wanted to we could send each other more pictures.

"I'm Will, Lou. Nice to talk to you in person. How are you?"

"I'm okay. I've done this before, so it's no big deal. This is a first time for you, isn't it?"

"Yeah. A new thing. I'm still not sure how to go about it."

"How many women have you met?"

"You're number three. I started with about fifty responses to my ad, but I've kind of worked them down by the process of elimination."

"Yeah ... makes sense. So, tell me about yourself. I already know you're a lefty like me. What do you write? Books?"

"No, I write features for the local newspaper and I do news scripts for the television station."

"Hey, that's cool. Can you make a buck doing that?"

"Yes. I make a decent living. How about you? Do you work?"

"Sure. I drive forklift at the auto parts distributor."

"Do you enjoy doing that?"

"It's okay. It keeps food on the table. I make enough to go out with the girls and have a good time on the weekend."

"Do you play bridge?"

"Naw. I don't go in for those fancy-schmancy games."

"You planning on having a family some day?" I asked, trying to lose this call soon.

"Naw. I don't need no rug-rats crawlin' around the place."

"Ah ... well ... I'm afraid that's what I was hoping for," I lied.

"Jeez, you should have said something in the ad. We wouldn't have wasted our time then."

"Yeah. I suppose I should have. Maybe next time. Thanks for talking to me Lou. Good luck finding a guy."

"Yeah, sure. Good luck to you too, Will. See ya."

I hung up wondering how I'd got this far along and found only one woman I could even relate to. Was the bar too high? Was I being too fussy? I sure as hell hoped not.

It was Friday night and I was supposed to meet Rich and Fiona at their favorite pub for a drink. I was just eight-thirty, so I assumed it wasn't too late and grabbed my jacket and car keys and headed out.

"So how's the great bed-partner search going, Will," Fiona chuckled.

"Not worth a damn. I think I need a new approach."

"Maybe you should try for ambidextrous," Rich smirked.

"Already tried that. Found a switch-hitter in the bunch."

"A what?" Fiona asked, looking at both of us before the light went on.

"Oh ... AC/DC huh?"

"You got it in one, girl," I said.

"Not one single one of them looked worth test driving?" Rich asked.

"Well, one did, but she was a giant and she didn't think it would work in the long term."

"A giant?" Fiona said, puzzled once more.

"Yeah ... basketball player size. Great looking, but almost a head taller than me."

"Man ... I could get into that," Rich said before Fiona gave him an elbow in the ribs.

"Just kidding, dear," he said, rubbing his side. Fiona had pointy elbows.

"So, how many more to go before you give up and start again?" Fiona asked.

"One. I'm thinking I may have been too cute for my own good. Maybe I should have just made the ad like everyone else did. You know, generic. Age, height, weight, job, etc., etc."

"Naw, you don't want to do that?" Rich said, shaking his head. "You aren't looking for ordinary. You're looking for special. Stick with the program, Will. Just be patient."

"Well, I'll have to do something if this last one doesn't pan out."

"I'll give it some thought over the weekend," Rich said, scratching his chin. "Maybe we can come up with a better approach. What if you include your photo with the ad like some of them do? Maybe you insist on a photo if they respond or you eighty-six their entry in the sweepstakes."

"Worth a try," I said as I signaled the waitress for another round. It was my turn to buy.

To be continued.