One Act Dramabyhansbwl©
This is a one act drama, or sketch played out in Virginia, in the small home town of:
Harry - the lead character and his friends:
Zed - considered to be a 0
Bob - he doesn't have a surname, just plain Bob will do,
Risq - also called by some 001 (with license to kill) and lastly but not forgotten,
Anonymous - the barkeeper. He is a guy who has a comment to all stories, but refuses to defend his allegations.
All characters are fictitious and resemblance to live persons is purely coincidental.
The curtain is raised and the scene is a bar, the sound of torrential rain is heard. The barkeeper is behind the bar counter polishing glass waiting for his first customer. The entrance door opens and three wet men enter the bar and walks up to the counter. They take off their wet coats and each take a seat, Harry in the middle with Zed to his right and Risq on his left side.
Anonymous (the bar keeper) – The usual, gentlemen?
Harry/Zed/Risq – Yes please.
The bar keeper pulls the pump and serves them one large glass draft Budweiser each.
Harry – Sorry my friends for dragging you out in this weather. The downpour took me by surprise. But a cold beer on a day like this; is not too bad, is it?
Zed – No, I really needed a break. I tried to put together an offer and did not see how I could get the numbers to fit within the customer's budget. I have to rethink the whole concept.
Risq – Did you actually work this late in the day; I was fed up and read stories on Literotica.
Zed – Sure. What did you read?
Risq – I found a story in the Loving Wife section called "Attack, the Best Defense".
Anonymous – I read that story too, it was just CRAP.
Risq – Is that all you have to say?
Anonymous – No, I think I also wrote Wimp, Wimp, Wimp in my comment. I gave it nil.
Risq – Well at least I wrote a long comment with my arguments. I saw Harry had written a comment as well. I agreed with you Harry, you called it a good plan. But you had forgotten something. I also gave it twenty-five percent, the same as you. We think alike.
Harry – I'm normally quite thorough, what did I forget?
Risq – Yes you are, but for once you were a man of few words. You know this Scandinavian guy. He is not a bad writer, but he does write these stupid stories. He should be put in place I think. Well, you didn't mention there would be consequences for her scheming.
Zed – I read that story too – Yuk! I thought it was a woman who wrote that story.
After a short pause, all three having a good pull on their glasses.
Zed – I read another story from the same writer I rather liked. That one I gave full score. I like happy endings.
Harry – Do you remember which story that was? I don't think I have ever given him full score.
Zed – It was a story called;" A Bundle of Wild Cards". I think I wrote a comment that there is a lot of pussy out there, even for seventy year old men. He had a lot of wild cards to spend.
Harry – Oh yes, I remember that story. That was a wimp story, the wife had had a lover for thirty years and he kept the cheating wife. I think you misunderstood that story. He did not go off using a wild card; he went to the fucking cinema for Christ sake - Zed.
Risq – I agree with Harry. I read his comment and as usual he beat me to it. I wrote a long comment too. Again I judged same as Harry, fifty percent score. He was a wimp. No, there is no other way to act upon cheating, kick the fucking bitch out on her ass.
Harry – Hear, hear, the only way.
Anonymous – I read it too, just Bull Shit.
The three men had again a short pause in their conversation. A serious topic as this takes some reflexions.
Risq – What are your plans for the afternoon Harry?
Harry – Well, as I do almost all Wednesday afternoons. Visit my little slut Millie. Her husband is always working late on Wednesdays, so I told my wife I work late Wednesdays also. It works fine, I have my fun and she has no idea.
Anonymous – But that's cheating, I didn't think you accepted that?
Harry – No, I don't call it cheating, I call it research. I have to learn the finer parts of sex play somewhere. I don't have it at home.
Zed – But Harry, your beautiful wife is all men's wet dream.
Risq – Yes she is. Her flaming red hair, her long slender body with boobs to mach. She must be anybodies perfect lover.
Harry – Well that's the problem. I have to hold her in tight leach. I demand she has her hair in a bun and wear conservative dresses all buttoned up when she goes out. She is allowed to go to church activities alone, other activities she has to be with me. I have to protect her from other men and I am careful not to broaden her sexual horizon so we stick to vanilla sex. That's why I need Millie.
The conversation was interrupted by the bar door opened and a new customer entered. The three men looked at the newcomer, recognized him and said:
Hi Bob, come and have a seat and a beer.
Bob – Thank you, I'd like to join you for a chat. I was in fact looking for you, Harry.
Bob found a bar stool and asked for Anonymous for a beer.
Harry – I thought you worked late on Wednesdays, Bob?
Bob – I used to, but not anymore. Today was my last day being late. I don't need to anymore.
Zed – Oh, what has caused this change, better job, new position?
Bob – No, I did not work late at all. Some time ago I found out my wife was cheating on me. I was unable to catch her so I found no proof. I decided I would give her a rope so she could hang herself. I installed recording equipment in our house and told her that I would work late on Wednesdays for a few months. It did not take many weeks before she found herself a fuck buddy and I had the proof I needed.
Risq – Good for you. You have been working late for several months now, took it that long for you to find out the facts?
Bob – No, I have known for a long time now. You see, when I found out who it was I was very surprised. I knew his wife, she is a smasher. I had met her at several church activities. So I contacted her and we hit it off immediately. So for the last few months while Harry here fucks my wife I have fucked his wife. She is wonderful woman, such a marvelous lover, I call her My Redhead.
Bob turns towards Harry – Is it not only fair, you fuck mine, and I fuck yours?
Harry – I'm sorry Bob, I didn't know Millie was your wife. (Shows anger and with raised voice continues) But no wife of mine is to get away with fucking another man. She is to pay, mark my word.
Bob – To late Harry, My Redhead – your wife – took out all cash in your account today and bought a Lexus. She has packed her belongings and dropped me outside this bar just now. She asked me if I could give you this envelope and say the magic words: "You are served". Here you are and it's all yours.
Harry sat there stunned, Bob moved towards the door turned around and was waving with another envelope – Next stop is my house and Millie, she will get this envelope with the same magic words. Then we – My Redhead and I – will leave town. Have a nice day gentlemen.
Bob walks out of the bar and the curtain falls.