Only the Truth Pt. 01

"Sadie! Saaaddiiee giiirrrl." My older sister's friend, Hannah, tottered into the kitchen on high heels which had now become a safety hazard. She tugged the bodice of her strapless dress a smidge higher, then leaned in close enough that the concept of personal space went right out the window.

"Whatcha doin'?" She followed my line of sight and made a little hum of approval when she discovered what had caught my attention. "Checkin' out the hottest guy here? Nice." 

The ends of her blonde bob brushed my cheek, and her warm breath hinted of Sambuca and... was that crab dip? I didn't want to encourage her, so I just gave her a smile and went back to admiring the man in question. Mason Blackwood; one-time crush of my teens, current starring role in all my adult fantasies.

I'd never mentioned my attraction to him to anyone, so until now, I'd been able to enjoy my obsession in private. I just hoped Hannah was drunk enough that she wouldn't remember our conversation tomorrow.

"Can't say I blame you." She wrapped her hands around my upper arm and swayed against me. "You know what they say about him, right?"  

"Yes, yes I do." Conversations about guy parts tended to catch my attention, and his had become so talked about these days it now had a personality all its own. Funnily enough, it didn't even make the list of things that interested me most about him. "Pretty sure everyone's heard the rumors, Han."

"Big dick," she said, carrying on as if I hadn't said a word. "Huge--and more than happy to share it with anyone who wants a piece of that sweet fucking man cake."

I snorted and shot her a look, ignoring the unintentional sting her words had caused. He wasn't mine. I had no reason to be upset about the attention he got from other women. If my heart could just get on board with that idea and stop flip-flopping around in my chest whenever I heard his name, I'd be fine. "You think maybe you should have another drink?"

We were celebrating my sister Claire's twenty-eighth birthday in the home she shared on the outskirts of Melbourne with her fiancé Andy--and Mason. Our parents were away in Hawaii for another week, and I didn't know many of Claire's friends. Three hours into the party, I had the distinct impression everyone was hammered but me. I couldn't risk drinking, though. I had the tendency for oversharing when I'd had a few, and my feelings for Mason had reached the point now where they'd come flowing out if I so much as sniffed a glass of wine.

"Nah." Hannah waved away my suggestion with a smile, like there was even the slightest chance I was serious. "I've drunken--dranken--shit. The bottle's all gone, is what I'm trying to say."

"That sucks."

"Speaking of sucking, give me five minutes alone with that beautiful bastard. That's all I'd need."

Oooo-kay. 

Mason had been a part of my life since he and Claire became best friends back when they were ten years old. Up until my late teens I'd mostly looked up to him in a harmless, hero-worship kind of way, and I'd never been shy about letting him know. When those feelings turned into something more intense, and more... adult, the change must have been so subtle it went straight over his head, because he still treated me like... I don't know. Like he had no clue one touch from him could make my skin tingle, or that when he hugged me my whole world felt like a better, calmer, safer place.

A while ago I would have laughed at a comment like Hannah's, but I'd unintentionally joined the ranks of girls who lusted after him, and all it did was remind me of my competition. Kind of disheartening since the rest of the women in his social circle were a lot more mature, experienced, and completely in the know about how to keep a man like him happy. 

What chance did I have as a twenty-one-year-old whose familiarity with men went as far as kissing and some minor groping?

I sighed and squeezed Hannah's hand while we took in the show. Mason stood amongst a cluster of women in a cleared area of the living room, flinging his arms around in that unique way of his that never failed to bring a smile to my face. His dancing style made him look like a hot, sexy idiot, and the fact that he didn't give a crap only increased his appeal. His dark hair was disheveled, his blue eyes bright and full of life. A day's worth of stubble shadowed his jaw, and his fitted charcoal t-shirt showed off the kind of muscles that made me wish for five minutes alone with him, too. 

"So, you haven't... gone there yet?" I asked, feigning disinterest while I secretly hung on her every word. 

"Me?" Hannah laughed. "Oh, no. Nonononono."

I frowned. She clearly liked him, and he'd developed a reputation for being a man-whore. Sleeping with each other should have been a natural progression. "Why not?"

"Oh, I tried. Don't get me wrong. I threw myself at him... told him straight out I wanted in his pants, but..." She stared off into the distance and swallowed hard. Her eyes watered and her grip on my arm tightened. 

Oh, God. Was she crying? 

Mason had always been known as a laid-back charmer. One of those types who was a natural with all kinds of people. I couldn't imagine him doing anything that might upset someone--at least not on purpose. "What happened?" 

Please don't let it be something that makes me see him in a different light.

"He... he turned me down." 

She swallowed again, and her eyes welled until tears threatened to fall. I glanced around the room then back at her, unsure how to handle this situation. Nobody liked being rejected, but her reaction seemed a little over the top. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah." She pulled in a deep breath. "I just... I think I'm gonna puke."

Oh, crap. "I thought you were crying about Mason!" I slid my arm around her waist and pulled her against me.

"No, not crying. More like... purging. On your shoes, maybe." She looked down at my black peep-toe heels, pointing at them like she wasn't sure I knew they were there. "Pretty shoes."

With a choking sound--a little amused, a lot horrified--my hold on her turned vice-like and I checked to make sure we had a clear run to the bathroom. "C'mon. Let's get you out of here."

Hannah leaned on me and let me do most of the work. We managed to cross the room without any major hold-ups, then rounded the corner to the relative quiet of the hallway. With no one else around and the bathroom door hanging open, it looked like we were in luck. 

"You're awesome, Sadie-girl," she said as she stumbled and sent me lurching toward the wall. "I think I might be in love with you."

I righted my footing and kept a firm hold on her, hoping like hell neither of us would end up with an injury. "Why don't we see how you feel about that tomorrow?"

She laughed, but then a beat later her humor died. The sound that came next could have been a hiccup or the beginning of something so much worse. Dread washed over me, and I shoved her through the door and dragged her straight to the toilet. 

She immediately dropped to her knees, hugged the bowl, and let out a god-almighty roar that made the tiny hairs rise on my forearms. With my hands pressing her chin-length hair to the sides of her head, I closed my eyes and sighed. If I thought Sambuca and crab dip had made a bad combination earlier...

I had no idea why I'd bothered trying to put myself on Mason's radar tonight. While he was out there having the time of his life surrounded by his harem, I was hidden away here playing nursemaid in the dress I'd specifically chosen for him--a little red number that did a pretty great job of showing off my legs and taking the focus from my less than impressive breasts. My dark hair flowed freely to the middle of my back, and I'd even put on makeup to highlight the grey in my eyes. 

Other than throwing myself at him naked, it looked like I'd have to come to terms with the fact that he didn't see me in that way and probably never would. 

Such a depressing thought. Even more so given my current circumstances.

I opened my eyes to check on the patient. "You doing okay there?" 

"Not done yet." 

Oh, God. Some things just couldn't be unseen. My eyes drifted closed again, and minutes dragged by like hours until I finally heard a burp echo in the toilet bowl. The sigh that followed filled me with relief. 

I let go of Hannah's hair and rubbed her back in slow circles. "All finished now?"

"Yeah." She swallowed and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "I'm done."

I helped her up from the floor and whipped a couple of tissues from the box on the vanity, handing them to her while I tugged the bodice of her dress into place. She'd obviously hit the wall now and would have no interest in getting back into the party. "Want me to organize a ride home or would you rather stay here?" 

Claire and Andy shared one of the bedrooms while Mason occupied another. The third had been set up as a guest room with a big, comfy bed I'd spent many a night in. Friends often stayed over so I didn't feel the need to clear it with Claire. Plus, she owed me one now.

"You're a good girl, Sadie." Hannah avoided eye contact with me and gave my arm an awkward pat. All the love she'd been feeling earlier had apparently faded in the face of her misery. "A ride would be great. I just wanna go home."

Oh, how I understood that feeling.

~ * ~

"Sadie!"

That made twice now someone had called out my name, except this time around the voice was deep and masculine. There were no signs of slurring either. I'd just come back inside after helping Hannah into an Uber, but I didn't need to adjust to the noise and chaos to figure out where the voice had come from. My gaze zeroed in on Mason and my heart gave a happy little thump.

He stood in the main part of the living room where the couches and coffee table had been dragged off to one side to make space for the guests. Half a dozen girls and a few guys were dancing there.

Mason didn't appear to notice any of the activity. His eyes locked on mine and he extended his hand, inviting me to dance without saying a word. When his fingers wiggled in encouragement, the urge came over me to run to him. Not in slow motion like they did in the movies either, more like one of those flat-out sprints where our bodies collided, and he had to wrap his arms around me to make sure I didn't send us both flying. Maybe grab my ass for balance, too.

I smiled and shook my head, not wanting to look too eager.

He raised his brows and waited.

A laugh burst from me, and I shook my head again. Always with the teasing and trying to draw out my playful side. I didn't know if he enjoyed the banter, or if it was just the novelty of being around a girl who refused to fawn all over him. Either way, it meant being able to spend some one-on-one time with him and earn those deep, rumbling laughs that always made my stomach flip with pleasure.

"Don't make me come over there," he called out. "We both know how that'll end."

He'd toss me over his shoulder like a caveman and haul me back there himself. Just the thought tempted me to stand my ground to see if he'd follow through in a room full of people. Instead, I gave in and made my way across the room, taking my time so he wouldn't be too pleased with himself.

His attention never wavered from my face as I approached. No sneaky peeks to check out the goods, no wandering gaze like he'd forgotten where my eyes were located. He merely looked at me with that charismatic half smile of his, like he had no idea I'd made all this effort just for him.

I couldn't understand why it didn't bother me anymore, why I wasn't desperate for him to notice the changes I'd made to my appearance. Even now with the dress and the hair and the makeup, I still couldn't get him to see me.

And then it hit me.

I came to a stop in front of him, and the force of the realization stole my breath.

He'd always seen me.

Maybe not in the way I wanted or wished for, but he'd never once left me feeling ignored or overlooked.

I pulled in a shuddering breath and fought back the surge of emotion.

My arms wanted to slide around his neck to the place where they always felt most at home. My lips wanted to press to his cheek to soak up his warmth. It took all my willpower to keep my hands to myself and maintain the foot or so distance between us.

"You don't want to dance with me?" Mason asked. "Are you trying to hurt my feelings?"

The humor in his tone helped snap me out of the strange mood that had come over me. When I felt the urge to goad him into our usual sparring, I knew I'd made it back to something that resembled normal. "It's more of a safety issue," I told him. "I'm just scared I might get injured by your flailing arms."

"Oh, is that right?"

I shrugged and gave him a meek smile. "Sorry."

"You don't look sorry." Mason grabbed my hand and pulled me against him. His fingers slid between mine, and his free arm wrapped around my waist, his hold on me tightening until our bodies were pressed together from chest to hip. "Maybe we should do some slow dancing then so there's no chance of injury."

God. Too close. Not close enough. If there was ever a moment for a spontaneous orgasm, now would have been that time. As he began swaying with me, I pulled in a breath and tried to ignore the rapid beating of my heart. He didn't slow dance with anyone. Ever. Why now? Why me?

"I saw the way you took care of Hannah," he said, seemingly oblivious to the thoughts ricocheting through my head. "You'd make a great nurse."

"Thanks." I made myself glance up at him and smile. "If you ever need someone to rub your back while you hug the toilet, I'm your girl."

He gave my hip a squeeze. "Pretty sure I can think of better things to hug."

"Like a teddy bear?"

"No." He spun me around without warning then dragged me back against him. For someone who made such a spectacular mess of freestyle dancing, he sure knew how to execute the slow moves. "I sleep with a stuffed penguin."

Such a simple thing to admit, but it made me smile because I'd just learned something new about him. Picturing a masculine guy like Mason snuggling with a penguin... God, why did that do things to me? I laughed and let him spin me around again. "How did I not know something that adorable about you?"

"Hmm... maybe because you haven't come in my room before."

The husky edge to his voice made my breath catch, the double meaning in his words shocking me in the best kind of way. When I lifted my gaze to meet his, electricity zapped between us, spreading goosebumps over my skin and leaving me feeling like I'd been wrapped in a warm blanket at the same time.

His expression tempted me, challenging me to take the conversation deeper. Maybe to a place not quite so innocent.

"You want me to come in your room so you can show me your penguin, Mason?"

He laughed and lowered me into a dip before bringing me to an upright position again. "If you're nice to me I might even let you hold it."

I stared up at him and blinked. Mason didn't talk to me this way. Sure, we had the witty back-and-forth thing going on and traded insults way too often, but this was different. Actual flirting. The kind he usually reserved for women who weren't me. "Well, if it's as appealing as I think it's going to be--"

"Don't go there, Sadie."

His tone and the reckless glint in his eye suggested he wanted me to do the exact opposite. We were already in unfamiliar territory, so there didn't seem to be any point in holding back now. "I'll probably want to kiss it on the head."

His loud bark of laughter made me feel ridiculously proud of myself. He let go of my hand and slipped his arms around me, holding me so firmly the muscles in his chest and abs were pressed against me. When he growled beside my ear, I dragged in a breath and held it, unsure how to react now we were standing so close to each other.

I had no idea what was going on here, but I didn't ever want it to stop.

We were hugging, but not in the way we usually did. This felt... God, it felt so nice.

Mason chuckled, the sound low and throaty and thrilling. He touched his lips to my temple, his mouth lingering there as if he didn't want to lose the connection. I sighed as our bodies began moving to the music again, continuing the pretense of dancing even though we'd progressed to something a whole lot more interesting.

"Are you drunk?" I turned my head and came into close contact with dark stubble and warm, tanned skin. He smelled so delicious, I wanted to lick him. "Is that why you're being all touchy feely with me?"

Nothing about the way he moved or spoke suggested he'd had too much to drink. He didn't need to be buzzed to start throwing around those crazy dance moves of his either.

He dipped his head and said softly, "You think a guy has to be drunk to want to touch you?"

A shiver skated across my skin. His mouth was so close to mine I could lean in just a fraction and be kissing him without too much effort. How would he react if I did? Would he push me away or pull me closer still? Would his kisses be full of fire and passion like I'd imagined, or would he be careful with me and take his time? "No, but I'm sure it helps."

Mason's lips quirked. "How wrong can one person be?" He dipped his hand under my hair and cradled the back of my head, working his fingers over my scalp in a way that sent tingles rushing through me. His eyes were filled with affection, but as the seconds passed by, his expression morphed into something more intimate and intense. I didn't have nearly enough experience with boys--or men in this case--to know how to take his shift in mood.

A breath stuttered from me, and my skin flushed. "What are you doing?"

His thumb swept over my temple just as the beginning notes of a new song drifted from the sound system. A cheer went up in the crowd, and a few guests pushed past us to make their way into the living room to dance.

Mason paid no attention to what was going on around us. He only seemed interested in me. "Nothing," he said, with a smile in his voice. "Not yet."

I couldn't tell if he was being serious or messing with me. We may have had the kind of relationship where we took regular digs at each other, but this had gone beyond harmless fun. I wanted to pull away and make some space so I could breathe. Protect myself before it went too far. "If this is your idea of a joke, it's not funny."

His free hand drifted over my waist, clasping my hip to keep me steady while the lower half of his body bumped against mine. A subtle move, but still enough pressure to have his hardness nudging my belly, long and firm and... oh, my God.

"Does it feel like I'm joking?"

Relief flooded me, the excitement that followed giving me a head rush. I pushed my hips against him to experience more of the same, rewarded with his quick intake of breath. "I can't... I don't know what to say. Why is this happening? You've never--why now?"

His husky laugh sent a wave of pleasure through me. A silent moment passed between us, then our eyes met, and his gaze dropped to my mouth. "Maybe I'm tired of holding back."

Holding back? Since when? So many questions, but I had no desire to talk when we appeared to be on the verge of something so much more exciting. As I braced myself for what I hoped would be coming next, a hand gripped my upper arm and tugged.

"Come dance with me, Sadie!"

No, no, no. I closed my eyes and forced back a groan.

My sister had the worst timing ever.

When my lids opened again, there she stood, the epitome of sophistication. Navy blue dress, blonde hair piled high on her head. Tall and slim and so composed, I always felt completely inadequate in her presence. Grey eyes much like mine implored me to ditch Mason and go spend some time with her, and while everything in me wanted to cling to him and refuse, I reminded myself it was Claire's birthday. It wouldn't be fair to her.