Sensitive Research Ch. 04

She turned to look at me over her shoulder and said, "Help me out sweetie, undo my bra for me."

I hesitated for a second, surprised to receive this request from her, but then said, "Yes, ma'am," and reached out and undid the three hooks on the back of her bra.

"Thank you, you're a dear," she smiled at me.

She let the bra straps slip off of her shoulders, and released the bra into her hands in front of her. She tossed it onto the coffee table. Looking over her shoulder at me again, she said, "Now help me with my panties."

I reached down and put my hands on the side of her hips, grasping the waistband of her panties. I started to tug them down, and only got an inch or so downward, just a little below the top of her ass crack when I heard her say, "Stop."

I froze, unsure if I had done something wrong. She looked at me once more and said, "I don't want you to use your hands."

I looked at her somewhat confused. "I'm sorry Mistress, what do you want me to do?"

"Well if you're not going to use your hands," she replied, "there's only one other option. Your teeth."

I looked at her, shocked that she would tell me to do this. My hesitation must have shown, because the smile left her face, and she said in a stern voice, "Get to it before I have to punish you, you little slut."

I knew I had no choice but to comply. I could not comfortably reach my mouth down to her waist bending down from where I was, so I got down on my knees next to her in front of the couch. I gingerly leaned forward, doing my best to get a firm grip with my teeth on the waistband. This put my nose right into the top of her butt crack, and as I did so, I couldn't help but inhale the scent emanating from her panties. It was a mixture of female arousal and the muskiness of her ass.

I made sure I had the panties firmly between my teeth, and started to gently tug them further down her body. As I did so, my nose dragged further down her ass cheeks, making the scent even more prominent. The lovely lavender perfume I had noticed when I first met her was overwhelmed by the powerful scents of the lower half of her body.

I had to almost prostrate myself to get the panties all the way down to the bottom of her legs. As I did, she stepped out of one side, and then the other. I wasn't sure what she wanted me to do at that point, so I just stayed on the ground like that. She said, "Now put them onto the table with your teeth."

I did as she ordered, and as I turned back to her, I saw her sitting down on the couch. Her naked breasts proved to be even more impressive than when I had seen them in her bra. As I suspected, it was not the bra that had kept them from sagging; they stood up prominently on their own, each with an areola at least two inches in diameter and a darker brown color than they had appeared in the picture of her. Her nipples were quite large, the size of the top joint of my pinky finger, and a deep red in color. The only word to describe her breasts was magnificent.

Just as in the picture she had shown me, she had a full growth of pubic hair between her legs. She was sitting on the couch with her legs spread quite wide, showing absolutely no signs of embarrassment about being naked in front of me. But then I thought to myself, why should she be at all embarrassed, after everything she had done to me?

She leaned back on the couch, pushing her pelvis forward, and looked straight into my eyes. I looked back at her, unable to avoid her stare. A smile appeared slowly on her lips, and she said to me, "Now get over here and get to work."

**********

I had a very fitful sleep, tossing and turning in the strange bed of the hotel, waking up numerous times. The first few times I woke I was able to get myself back to sleep, but on the fourth or fifth time, I found myself wide awake. I looked at the clock on the nightstand between my bed and Tara's, and saw that it was 3:30 in the morning.

I couldn't help but think of everything that occurred at Lady Amber's the last evening. What struck me the most was not the things that she did to me, or made me do to her, but how well she managed to understand me and what I needed. It was almost as if she were a therapist and was able to look directly into my psyche.

As I thought about this, I became overwhelmed - not just because of Lady Amber's ability to look so deeply inside of me, but more so by the implications of what she found there. A whole side of me as a submissive, a part of me that I did not even know existed, was now something that I was going to have to live with the rest of my life. And it wasn't just the submissiveness, but the way that I had reacted sexually to another woman as well. The import of this revelation was overwhelming and the more I thought about it, the more upset I became, and I started to cry.

I didn't want to wake Tara, so I turned my head into my pillow, trying my best to bury my sobs. But they must have been loud enough to rouse her, because I heard her soft voice, "Susan, what's wrong?"

I tried to pull myself together so she wouldn't see the depth of my feelings. "Nothing," I managed to get out between sobs, my face still turned toward the pillow.

"No, there's something wrong, I can hear you crying." I could see, even with my head buried in the pillow, that she had turned on the light on her side of the nightstand. "Please tell me what's going on," she implored.

I managed to stop crying enough to turn toward her and say, "Really, Tara, I'm okay, I'm just overtired I guess."

She got out of bed, and came over and sat on the side of my bed. "Susan, please don't lie to me, I've never seen you like this. Won't you please talk to me and tell me what's going on? What happened to you last night?" She reached for the box of tissues on the nightstand, pulled one up, and handed it to me.

"Thanks," I said, blowing my nose. I sighed, and realized that she wasn't going to give up until I said something. So I put a couple of the pillows behind my head and sat up a little bit.

"Now that's better. So why are you crying?"

I looked at her, and noticed that her short nightgown had ridden up, so that it was barely covering her ass and pussy. She was sitting with her legs facing away from me, so I couldn't see her pussy, but given what she was wearing it was difficult not to imagine what she looked like under the nightgown. "Jeez, get a grip," I thought to myself, upset that I was thinking about Tara this way.

I had to think of something I could say to her, because I know she wouldn't leave me alone until I did. I decided to try to keep it as simple as possible in the hopes of satisfying her curiosity.

"It was just very emotional talking to Lady Amber," I started. "I guess some of the things we were talking about, you know, her work, made me think a lot."

"Made you think about what?" Tara inquired.

"Well. . ." I hesitated, not sure exactly what I could say to her. "We talked about the women who come to see her, her clients, what she does with them, and why they come to see her."

"Why was that emotional for you?"

"I don't know, I guess because I could see myself in so many of them. Many of her clients are middle-aged, professional women, like me, and while some are married, she has many who are single as well."

Tara looked at me, seemingly thinking about this for a moment. After a few seconds, she said to me in a soft voice, "Susan, have you ever thought about going to see someone like Lady Amber?"

I looked up, glancing into her eyes and could see her staring at me. "I don't know, Tara, I really don't. When we first started the project, I would have no more thought about being a client of one of these dommes than I would have thought about being a rodeo rider." I managed to laugh a bit at that analogy, and Tara smiled back at me. "But I guess with all of these observations we've been doing," I continued, "the acts that these women engage in are becoming less extreme to me, and more understandable and believable. So I guess, I'd have to answer, yes, I could see myself there."

Tara smiled at me once again, and she reached out and patted my bare arm. "That's okay, Susan," she said. "I don't have to tell you that there is absolutely nothing wrong with what these women are doing. It's all consensual, it makes them feel good, and in some ways, I think it's empowering for them." I appreciated her attempt to comfort me, and I admitted to myself that her hand on my arm felt reassuring.

"Empowering?" I inquired. "What do you mean by that?"

Tara pulled her hand away, swung her legs around and climbed up on the bed, I presumed to make herself more comfortable as the conversation continued. She sat cross-legged, and as she did, her short nightgown afforded me an excellent view of her panty-clad pussy. Even in the dim light of the single lamp she had turned on, I could see they were a peachy color, and were sheer enough that I could make out that she had trimmed her blonde public hair. As I observed this, my mind was flooded once again of memories of last evening, and my first experience with the pussy of another woman.

"Well, think about it, Susan," Tara continued. "The dommes allow these women to take control of their own sexuality, and help them to experience something they most likely have not been able to experience with other partners. If it wasn't for them, these women would be left with a hole in their sex lives, and would be unfulfilled, knowing they were missing something. But by seeing the dommes, the women get to explore a part of themselves, which can only empower them."

I thought about what she said, and realized that she was right. While some of the women may have had satisfying BDSM relationships with their partners, we knew from the interviews we had already conducted that for many of the women the visit to a domme was their only opportunity to engage in BDSM acts. Sometimes it was because they couldn't find partners who were interested in it. For others, it was because social pressure or the fear of being outed as depraved or kinky instilled a fear in these women of engaging in BDSM play as part of their regular lives, so they instead compartmentalized it by visiting the dommes.

"Maybe you're right, Tara," I acknowledged. "I guess for at least some of the women it is empowering for them." I was still glancing at her panties underneath her nightgown. "God," I thought to myself, "I'd love to see what she'd look like out of them." But I quickly tried to push that thought out of my head, knowing that any relationship between a professor and graduate student could lead to nothing but trouble.

"Does that make you feel better, Susan, realizing that?"

I laughed. "Why would that make me feel better, understanding that about those other women?" I asked her.

She looked at me intently, and hesitated, as if she was deciding whether to say something or not. But then she went on, "Because understanding that about those other women would make it easier to accept it in yourself."

"Oh please," I started to say, trying to deny what she was telling me. "It's not that. . ..," but then I stopped. Tara was still looking right at me, waiting for me to try to argue with her. But I realized it was fruitless to argue, because she clearly had come to know me almost as well as Lady Amber had.

"Susan, it's okay, it really is - there's nothing wrong with what these women are doing." She scooted a little closer to me on the bed, pinning me under the covers. She reached out and took my right hand which had been lying on top, and held it in her left hand. She was being so sweet to me; she knew I was conflicted, and was trying to support me. "You really do see yourself in some of them, don't you?"

Now it was my turn to hesitate. Tara continued to hold my hand, and with her right hand began to gently stroke my arm with her fingers, as if to reassure me. It must have been working, because I felt that I could open up to her a little bit.

"Yes, Tara, I think I do. I guess that's why it was so emotional with Lady Amber last night, because the things she was saying to me made me realize that I had more in common with her clients than I had known before." She continued stroking my arm, and I felt even more assured and trusting of her.

"In common in what way?" she asked.

I looked down at her hand stroking my arm, and watched, as her fingers moved gently up and down, just grazing my skin. I realized that this, combined with my view of her panties underneath her nightgown, was starting my own juices flowing. I kept telling myself it was wrong, that I needed to tell her to stop, but it was making me feel so much better that I couldn't get myself to do so.

I couldn't make eye contact with her, so I continued to look down at my arm and her hand stroking it. "In common in that I could see myself in the position of her clients," I confessed to her.

"You mean you could see yourself as a submissive?"

I sighed, and decided I might as well admit it to her. I wasn't yet prepared to tell her what had actually happened, but I felt comfortable admitting to her the feelings that had been stirred in me. "Yes, as I was talking to her last night, I realized that I could very easily be one of those submissive women."

"Oh Susan, I'm so proud of you for being able to admit that," she said, almost joyfully. She leaned forward, and threw her arms around me, pulling my head over her shoulder, and hugged me. I put my hands around her, and hugged her back. I could feel her firm breasts pressing up against mine as she did this, and I was struck by her kindness and caring for me. As often happens when someone is being so nice to me, I became overwhelmed by it and found myself beginning to cry again.

Tara must have heard me, because she began rubbing my back, and said softly into my ear, "It's okay, Susan, it really is. There's nothing to be ashamed about, and you can admit it to me."

I continued to cry, but felt incredibly comforted by her words and by her warm hand rubbing my back. After a minute or two, I was able to calm down once again, and my tears dried up. I pulled back from the hug, and looked into her eyes. "Thank you Tara, I really appreciate it. I've just never talked to anybody about this before, and the emotions have just overtaken me. You're being so sweet to me, I just can't thank you enough."

Tara looked back at me, and didn't say a word. Then she leaned forward just a bit, and before I realized what had happened, I felt her lips on mine.

**********

I knew I was powerless to fight Lady Amber, and had no choice but to comply. I rose to my knees, and closed the distance between the two of us so that I was between her two legs. In that position, my head was just about level with her beautiful breasts. I looked up into her eyes, and she still had a little smile on her lips. She encouraged me forward with an almost imperceptible nod of her head.

I leaned forward, extended my tongue, and began to lick at her left breast. I ran it all over the breast - the top, the bottom, each side, even lifting it with my two hands so that I could lick underneath, where it jutted out from her chest. I avoided the impressive nipple at first, wanting only to savor my first taste of another woman's breast. She settled down a little further into the sofa, and I followed her as she did so, maintaining contact between my tongue and her breast.

"Now suck it," she commanded in a low voice. I complied, opening my mouth and latching onto her huge nipple. I began to swirl my tongue around it, feeling the rough texture of its outer layer. I bit down gently, not too hard, an act that must have pleased her because it elicited a little gasp from her. "Oh you sweet bitch, you really want it, don't you?" she said. "Go ahead, I like that."

I bit a little harder and then began to suck on the nipple. It seemed to grow even larger in my mouth, and I began to smell the distinctive scent of female arousal. I could tell the effect I was having on her, and knowing that, I was becoming even more turned on myself.

After another minute or so, she pushed my head off of her breast. "Now the other one," she urged me on. I did as she told, and echoed on the right breast what I had done on the left, first licking all over, and then focusing on its equally engorged nipple. This continued for another couple of minutes, until I felt something poking at my mouth. I opened it slightly, trying to maintain the grip on her nipple, and as I did so I felt one of her fingers being pushed between my lips. I was right in my assumption that she must have been quite turned on again, because I realized her finger was soaking wet with her pussy juices. I sucked greedily on her finger, enjoying the taste once again that she had fed to me earlier when I was lying across her lap.

"Oh you are such a greedy little slut," she said as I sucked on her finger and nipple simultaneously. After a few seconds, she pulled it out of my mouth with a "pop." She then put her hands on the side of my head and pushed it away from her breast once again.

"Okay," she said, "now for the main course." She moved her hands to the top of my head, and pushed me downward. I knew what she wanted, and realized that I was about to embark on my first experience of licking another woman's pussy. I moved downward and forward a bit, steadying myself with my hands on her thighs. As I did with her breast, I started by sticking out my tongue, and began to lick her outer labia. It wasn't an easy task, because of the thick pubic hair that covered them. But they were quite prominent, and after a few licks I was able to part her hair enough that I could easily run my tongue over each one.

My earlier assumption about her arousal was confirmed; as my tongue neared the base of each, I felt and tasted her juices running out of her pussy. This sensation urged me on even further, and the more I licked, the wetter she seemed to get. I began to suck one of her labia into my mouth, an action that elicited another gasp from her. I sucked away for about 30 seconds before I switched to the other one. I went back and forth like this a few times, and her arousal only seemed to grow based on the juices that were now flowing like a river out of her pussy.

"Okay, you little slut," I heard her say, "I want to feel that tongue right up my pussy." I was only too eager to comply, and I stuck my tongue out as far as it would go and jammed it right where she wanted it. I was greeted with an dusky succulence, as if I had found the source of her arousal. I swished my tongue around in it, and felt the juices running over my tongue and down my throat as I did so.

I continued to jam my tongue in and out, and circling it around, soaking up as much of her juices as I could. After a few minutes, I felt her hands on my face pushing me backward. I sat back just a bit and watched as I saw her place two fingers on either side of her clitoral hood and retract it out of the way. Out popped what looked like a huge clitoris - huge at least by the standards of my own, which was the only frame of reference that I had. She took her other hand, placed it behind my head, and pulled my head back into her crotch. No words were necessary; I knew exactly what she wanted.

I placed my lips around her large clit, and began treating it like I had her nipples. I swirled my tongue around it a bit, and then began to suck. I alternated - first swirling, then sucking, and as I did so, I felt her body begin to tense up. I strengthened my suction, and I felt her put her hand back on my head and pull it even tighter into her crotch. As I sucked as hard as I could, I felt her body begin to shake, first gently, but then more violently. It was a challenge to keep my mouth affixed to her, but I managed to do so, and after a short while longer, I heard her scream out, "Awwwwww," as her orgasm washed over her, and her ass lifted right off of the couch. I stayed with her, and as she came back down, I released her clit and sat back.