Something Old, Something New Ch. 01byvelvetpie©
It was a given that I was nervous. I had been divorced for nearly four years and had moved from Virginia to San Francisco. It was a long, daring trip but I was determined to put some space between my ex-husband and my adult children because I'd made a decision that I knew they wouldn't agree with.
After 23 years of marriage, I decided to become a lesbian.
I didn't have any idea of what I was doing, really. All I knew was that lesbian scenes in the porno movies that we'd bought together made me hotter than hell and I found myself wishing that I could suck on the succulent pussy lips that I saw on the screen. I knew that I loved watching Queer As Folk and The L Word and found myself watching a lot of Logo programming. I knew that when I masturbated, I envisioned my pussy being sucked by a woman with beautiful lips and an agile tongue.
I admit that I knew nothing about being a lesbian. I knew even less about myself but I didn't discover that until I landed in Frisco and went out to my first club. I chose a mixed club for my first foray, thinking that since I'd had plenty of gay male friends while I was married and had visited lots of clubs, I would feel more comfortable there. I couldn't have been more wrong. Most of the ladies came as couples and I found myself having wonderful conversations as the third wheel.
I went out three successive weekends in a row and once I discovered the problem, I went home and sulked for the next weekend. In between times, I met some of my apartment mates. The building I was renting in had six huge apartments, two on each floor, and the landlord had explained to me that all of the occupants were professionals like myself. While I was the manager of an advertising firm, Tom and Bob on the bottom floor were engineers and had rented the entire floor.
Jessica was a model and was rarely home and Henrietta was a real estate saleswoman and they occupied the second floor apartments, separately. Besides me on the third floor was a British gentleman named Nigel and he was a pilot. The weekend I was sulking, I was surprised to hear a knock on my door and even more surprised to find Tom and Bob standing outside. Tom was the top of the couple, tall, dark-haired and very attentive to his tow-headed mate, possessively touching his shoulders.
"Hi, I'm Bob Donaldson and this is my husband, Tom Turner."
"We noticed that you moved in several weeks ago but we've been too busy to properly welcome you. Is this a good time to have a couple glasses of wine?"
They were so cute. I stood aside and let them enter, ushering them into the kitchen and stowing their warm bottles in the freezer. I was glad that I had another couple of bottles of Santa Margherita Pinot Grigio already ice-cold and I poured three glasses while they gave me a short history of their relationship. They had been together for nine years and had been married when the mayor, Gavin Newsom, had circumvented California law and had allowed same sex couples to marry. We made small talk for several minutes before Bob broke the ice by asking about my past. I refilled our glasses and let loose the dogs of divorce.
"Wow, that sucks!"
I laughed at his summation and swallowed half my glass of wine. "I've never heard it said quite so eloquently but yes, it sucked." I took a breath. "But that is the past."
"And your future is being a lesbian?" Tom caressed Bob's cheek almost absent-mindedly and I envied the natural response between them as Bob turned his lips into Tom's palm and planted a soft kiss there. "After all those years of marriage?"
"How can you be so sure?"
I contemplated Bob's words for a few seconds before allowing myself to answer him. "I'm not sure." I met their eyes and just as quickly looked away. "I just know what's been pulling my heart. Maybe I'll get whatever it is out of my system and return to men."
"You don't sound like you really believe that." Tom observed, taking a deep swallow.
"I guess I'm trying to convince myself." I emptied the remainder of the bottle into my glass and arose to fish another cold bottle out of the refrigerator. "I've been out three weekends in a row and I haven't met anyone."
"As cute as you are, you haven't met anyone?" Bob looked me up and down and looked over at Tom. "How does that happen?"
"Well, I've met several girls but either they're already attached or they want a one-night stand."
"And you don't want either?"
"No, Bob. I want a real relationship. I want to be with someone."
Tom nodded, again touching Bob with a tenderness that I envied. "I understand that, Alexa, but you can't expect to find that right out of the gate."
"Why not? We met on your first night in town."
"I know but we were lucky, Muffin." I smiled at Tom's pet name for his lover. "Not everyone can be as blessed as we were."
"He's right." I agreed, rubbing my eyes wearily. "You were very lucky."
"And you can be, too!" Bob said defiantly, glancing at Tom. "We just have to figure out a way to make it happen."
"And how do I do that?"
"It's time to hit the lady clubs."
I shook my head. "No, Bob. No more clubs for me."
"Alexa, do you want to be alone?"
"Of course not!"
"Then you can't give up." Tom murmured softly, touching my hand. "Everyone deserves to be happy, Alexa. Some of us just have to work for it a little harder than others."
I looked up into Tom's blue eyes, then into Bob's green ones and swallowed against the lump that was forming in my throat. Bob slid off the stool and hugged me, planting a shy kiss on my cheek and holding me as tears burned my eyes. "You'll find someone, Alexa. I know you will."
I accepted his heartfelt words and broke away, wiping my eyes and pouring more wine. I was so happy to have finally made friends. At least I had an anchor in my new crazy world. When Tom and Bob left, I stumbled off to bed, closing my eyes against the tears that threatened to consume me and decided to leave my farther foray into lesbianism to the side for now.