Taste of True Friendship Ch. 04byBenny_Blank©
Did I tell you? I finally got to see the entire video we did that night in the porno shop. And, let me tell you, I got almost as hot looking at it as I did doing it in the first place. Plus, there were lots of things that occurred to me upon seeing the finished film that didn't strike me while it was happening or when I reviewed the experience just in my mind.
First, I had no idea of the number of different camera angles that the guys got. I mean, there were long shots, close ups, macros, side shots, top shots, fade-ins and fade-outs. And the quick cuts between, for example, Jock and DeDe and Louie and Jen were terrific. I could feel an orgasm coming on without even having to use my fingers.
Second, I had no idea- -in all modesty- -how sexy I looked in my shots. You know, I had always considered myself pretty much an "ugly duckling" what with my weight, and everything. But I hadn't realized how much I'd slimmed down. Well, I was 140-ish but, contrary to what they say, the camera didn't make me look fatter. I thought I looked pretty slim, all things considered. And I'd always thought I looked a little "boyish"- -O.K. like a lesbian- -but that was an intriguing difference, especially in the girl-on-girl scenes. I thought the other girls were so pretty, turned out the way they were with the shaving and things like that, but I think I made a nice contrast with them. O.K., so they had shaved twats. Big Deal! I thought looking at my pussy through some bush added some mystery. Besides, I've always thought that a nice bush added the impression off "flavor and aroma", two very important and stimulating things- -for me at least. I looked "real". Most women don't have perfect figures, or are the perfect weight, or have perfect boobs. But next to DeDe, Jen and Kim who, in all honesty, looked a little "plastic" on film, I looked like someone you might meet at the post office, in the store, at the gas station and wind up having sex with- -whether you were a male or a female.
Third, my cocksucking was magnificent! Really! I was always so caught up in doing it and enjoying it, I'd never really thought what it might look like from an outside perspective. Those cameramen out did themselves it capturing all of the nuances of fellation. When I saw my lips surround those cocks, especially that guy with the 12incher, I just about came again. And the shots of the "shots" were unbelievable. Not just mine but the other girls too. There was a sequence of frames where they caught cum flowing over Jen's hand, or oozing out of my lips, or shooting over my shoulder and into my hair, and repeated them from several different angles. Whew! Hot-hot-hot!! And the sequence with the "serial" blowjobs of the cameramen and the techs was mind blowing. Yep, those guys knew their business and, lets face it, may have been a little inspired themselves considering they were recipients of some of the play.
Finally, and this may be the most important, I saw lots of things I could have done better. I looked a little wooden in some spots, not at all relaxed. I saw where I could have been more expressive without having to overact. Remember, I was afraid to speak up and whispered to Kim because I wasn't sure what to do? Well, I know now that I should have thrown in some more dialogue, even if it was only "Oh, Baby- -Oh, Baby" or "Yes, Yes, YES". Also, I could have done more with my hands, not necessarily from an "acting" standpoint but from a having sex standpoint. There were lots of places where some timely stroking, petting, and tweaking would have gone a long way. And, except for my orgasm scenes and the cocksucking frenzy at the end, I looked a little too serious. After all, this whole thing is about having fun.
As long as I had gotten into this thing, I figured I'd try to learn more about it and how to do it well.
You remember when everyone was saying their good-byes after the shoot finished? Kim gave me a slip of paper that had her phone number on it. Remember? She asked me to give her a call. Remember? DeDe didn't appear all that happy that Kim had done that. Notwithstanding that, I resolved to give Kim a call to see what she could share with me about getting good at this porno film business.
A couple of days after our porn shoot, I decided to call Kim. I got her on the first try. I recognized right away that it was her cel-phone because I could hear hustle-bustle, public noises in the background when she answered.
"Oh! Hi, Wanda!" She seemed excited to hear from me. "Seriously, I was just thinking about you. I'm glad you called."
"Thanks," I tried to sound casual but I was actually excited to talk to her again. "I have been thinking about you, too. And I just wanted to thank you for all of your help the other night and....well....you know!"
"Sweetie, sweetie, sweetie, " she cooed, "I should thank YOU too. It was gooood for me, too! Mmmmm--mmmmmm--MMMMMM!"
I giggled at that and I'm sure I blushed along with it. Remembering that session with her made me a little hot.
"Can we get together sometime?" I decided to get to the point, "I mean, well, not 'together' but, you know, sit down and talk?"
"Sweetie, I wouldn't mind a little 'together' at all," She put on a sexy tone, "But, yeah, I would like to talk with you too. I'm going to be through here in about an hour. How about meeting me at my place?"
I said that would be a good idea and I copied down her address. "O.K., see you about 2:30. Bye"
I stopped at a coffee place, got a latte' and paged through some magazines for a while. Then I made my way over to Kim's place.
She lived in a up-scale but not posh part of town. The streets were elbow to asshole with apartment houses, mostly three or four story affairs with twenty to thirty units in each building. Some were nicer than others but all of them looked very much better than the place that I was living in. Parking was impossible. After I found her building, I had to find a parking space and it was about two blocks away. Fortunately, there weren't any hourly restrictions so I didn't have to worry about the length of my visit.
I went into the foyer of her building and buzzed her apartment. A female voice answered, "Yeah?"
I said, "Hi, It's Wanda. I need you to buzz me in."
"I'll think about it." That response was a little snotty and it made my heart sink a little. "O.K., O.K., C'mon up."
Kim's apartment was on the third floor and all the way up in the elevator my mind worked on me. "Why in the world would she be so irritated now when she sounded so sweet just an hour or so ago? What could I have done to piss her off that quick?"
When I got to the door, I found out. It wasn't Kim that answered the door- -it was DeDe!
"DeDeeeeee.....Hi...." I tried to sound cheerful even with seeing her glowering at me. "I wasn't expecting to see you here."
"I'll BET!" DeDe shot back more than a little crisply. "C'mon in. Kim will be here in a couple of minutes. She called me and told me she would be running a little late and that you'd be coming buy and for me to let you in."
"Thanks, DeDe, " I said, still trying to remain pleasant. "You're looking very nice today."
She was barefoot and dressed in an almost see through white cotton dress. Almost see through? Well, it was see through when the light was behind her. I could see the contours of her body and, as she moved, I could see the swell of her breasts under the material and the outline of the of her nipples as they pressed against the sheer fabric. I hadn't noticed this at the porno shoot- -there were more exciting things to look at- -but DeDe had very pretty feet. I would guess her to be a size 5 or maybe size 6 with nicely shaped toes (no corns or bunions or ugly nails) that were exquisitely pedicured. And her gait was smooth, hardly a bounce or flounce but her hips swayed in just the right way. She had "it" in her walk for sure.
"Nice today?" She was snippy, "I look nice all of the time!"
"Well, yes, DeDe, you do, " I was trying to be placating, "I think you are a naturally beautiful person- -top to bottom!"
"Yeah, Yeah" Snotty DeDe again. "I'll bet you tell that to all the girls."
"No, No, DeDe. I mean that." I stepped up my sweetness quotient again. "I DO mean that. You have a wonderful body and you certainly know how to carry yourself. I think you are...well...just beautiful."
She was walking away from the door toward the living room and she looked over her shoulder at me. "Might as well come in and sit down while you're waiting." She seemed a little mollified.
I tried to make some small talk but stroke DeDe at the same time.
"DeDe, I really enjoyed watching you perform the other night." I wanted to appeal to her pride both as an actress and a lover. "You sure got Jock off- -Big Time!"
"Yeah? I don't think it was so hot." I sensed it would be hard to get DeDe to acknowledge anything positive about anything. "That Son-of-a-Bitch didn't get the fucking cues right. In stead of pulling out and turning me on my back so he could come on my tits, he kept screwing my ass and wound up coming all over my back so I had to kneel there looking like a dork until 'gofer' guy could clean the jizz off of me. Coming on tits is always good; coming on your partner's back is.....like GAY."
"Well, I thought his load looked yummy." I tried to keep it positive, "I could barely restrain myself from jumping into the frame and licking it off of your back but then 'gofer' beat me to it with his washcloth. What a waste!."
"You like to eat cum, don't you?" I wasn't sure if that was a compliment, a jibe, or just a question. "Jerry said that you'd be a good cocksucker- -and he was right I guess, judging by the finale."
"I don't know what came over me- -no pun intended." I chuckled, keep it lighthearted and treat her comment as if it were a compliment. "All the time Jerry had told me to just 'go with it' so, I guess I just got cum-hungry and went with it."
"Well, it worked out pretty good, I guess." Was this a hint of something positive from DeDe? "It sure knocked the crew's jocks off!"
Then DeDe turned dark again and glared at me. "So, what happened with you and Kim? For someone who just likes dicks, it sure looked like you enjoyed THAT!"
"You know, DeDe, I honestly can't explain that." I put on a sincere tone. "To be honest, I've never experienced anything like that before. I mean, I'd never had sex with a girl before and I'd certainly never thought I'd have an orgasm doing it."
"Are you serious?" DeDe seemed skeptical and purposely bitchy. "You mean you've never, ever done anything like that with a woman? It sure looks to me like you're the type. I mean you look butch to me."
She struck a nerve with that one and I could tell that she could tell that she had. I tried to keep my composure but I am sure I betrayed the hurt. Nevertheless, I had to give her a strong come back. I knew that at some point I had to impress on Ms. Bitch-Kitten that I wasn't going to take much more of her shit.
"Listen DeDe," I shot back with more than a little edge in my voice, "I've been hearing that crap pretty much all my life. You think you're the first one to throw that one at me? Just because I'm a little heavy-set and have short hair doesn't mean I'm butch. I know, Ms. Cutsey-Ass with the Big Boobs, you can get any guy you want and you've been able to do it forever. You don't know what it's like having to watch girls like you getting all of the sugar, thinking they're better than everyone else, looking down their noses at the other girls that aren't good looking and calling them losers or dykes. You're just a self-centered sex-snob!"
I was really starting to fume. "You don't know what it's like to want some guy's cock and not be able to get it. I do! I had to find a way to get some for myself and I did! It all fell into you lap; I had to go out and get mine! You just don't know! So, don't sit there and disparage me because of how I look or what you THINK I am."
I must have intimidated DeDe because, for one, she actually shut up long enough for me to get my rant off and, for two, her eyes started to tear up. Then she put her face in her hands and honest-to-god started to cry.
"No, Wanda, YOU don't understand." She turned her teary face toward me. "You DON"T understand what I'm saying. I'm not upset that you're trying to steal some guy away. I'm mad because Kim got you off and, what's worse, that you got Kim off! Don't you see, I can't stand it because I think you're trying to snake Kim away from me!"
I was dumbstruck. I guess I should have gotten the picture before but I completely missed it. I thought DeDe and Kim were friends, co-predators of the male of the species who didn't like some plain Jane girl coming in and beating their time. I didn't get that they were lovers and that one of them might be jealous if the other found a bigger turn-on.
DeDe had pretty much melted into a puddle by now. I thought I might have to slap her to get her back to reality. But I reached over and put my hand on her shoulder and then up to her cheek.
"DeDe, I'm sorry if I came on so strong." I mellowed out my voice and tried to sound apologetic and reassuring at the same time. "I really had no idea where you were coming from. You just struck a nerve with that 'dyke' thing. I suppose I'm hypersensitive to that- -for obvious reasons. I understand a little more now but would you like to tell me more about what the deal is?"
I sat down on the couch next to DeDe and reached out again and put my arm around her shoulders. "C'mon, c'mon, " I said, "Tell me what's going on."
DeDe began to tell me her life story. I hadn't asked for that but that's what I was going to get. I suppose, though, that I needed to know that to understand where she was at now. I also think that she needed to unburden herself because as she began to talk she seemed to relax more and more.
She grew up an only-child in a strict and abuseive household- -not sexually abusive but physically and emotionally so. Both of her parents were disciplinarians and perfectionists who made her feel as if she couldn't ever do anything right; and her father was a large man who rarely spared the rod rather than spoil his child. She had a few, but not very good, friends. Despite her "cheerleader" good looks, she didn't have sex during her high school years, other than masturbation- -which she enjoyed. She left home right after high school and moved to a nearby city and got a couple of jobs, one as a secretary in an insurance agency and the other working in a "cineplex" doing whatever was required.
She got involved with a customer of the insurance agency. This guy was a plumbing contractor- -she later found out was married- -who helped her out with her bills and expected, and got, sex in exchange. Her first actual sexual encounter was with him and it was pretty much date-rape. She had no feelings at all for him other than he was a source of support for her and her attitude toward sex with him was just as pragmatic- -she got no joy from either. The only orgasms she ever had were from masturbation.
Now, this plumber guy made pretty good money and had lots of connections- -no pun intended. One of the people he knew was a guy who produced porn movies. The plumber guy introduced DeDe to the movie guy and, the next thing she knew, DeDe was doing parts in films for cash. She had a terrific body, a pretty face, and was willing to do pretty much anything sexual, mainly because she was indifferent to it. DeDe said that having sex with men was kind of like doing the dishes or cleaning up the bathroom: it was a chore, she felt no pleasure from it, and were it not for the money she was making from it she would probably not have done it at all. She didn't think of herself as a prostitute but as an actress. Indeed, it took no little acting ability for her to appear to enjoy doing something that was unenjoyable.
Then she met Kim.
Kim was one of the porno producer's favorites, not really in his "stable" but a friend upon whom he would call on occasion to do selected shoots. Kim did porno because she enjoyed it. Getting paid didn't hurt but she didn't really need the money. She was pretty much set up financially from a modest trust fund, plus she did freelance work in the fashion industry- -not a model but worked behind the scenes with models, helping manage them. She was also a good source for new girls to the porn business, a lot of models who really weren't making it needed some "part time" income.
As I said, Kim did porn because she enjoyed it. Hell! She enjoyed sex! As indifferent as DeDe was to sex, Kim was enthusiastic. Whereas DeDe just did sex of all kinds, Kim enjoyed sex of all kinds. DeDe rarely experienced orgasm and then only when she was masturbating, never when she was having sex with a partner; Kim usually had an orgasm and often had multiple orgasms no matter what variety of sex she was participating in. She was just plain wired for it. (Kim told me later that she would actually have an orgasm, without any form of physical masturbation, just watching other people have sex.)
DeDe met Kim on a shoot. Kim was outgoing and DeDe was chary but after engaging in an hour-long session of lesbian sex- -manual stimulation, clit licking, crotch rubbing, dildo pumping sex- -DeDe had achieved the first orgasm of her life with a partner. (I saw that video sometime later and even I could tell that there was some genuine sexual pleasure going on there, both with DeDe and Kim. We're talking vigorous physical effort, intense orgasms, and glassy-eyed satisfaction. Whew!)
Well, the bonding had taken place. DeDe and Kim became an "item". Kim moved DeDe in with her at Kim's apartment and pretty much supported her. DeDe didn't have to fuck the plumber anymore, didn't have to please him by giving his friends blowjobs and, in fact, didn't have to do porn anymore. But a funny thing happened, DeDe found herself wanting to keep doing porn not because she enjoyed it but because- -in an odd way- -it kept her close to Kim. She wouldn't do shoots where Kim wasn't there. Kim would sometimes go on "assignments" by herself but more and more DeDe would insist on accompanying her and would usually wind up having sex with Kim on camera when they were together. The bond was perhaps becoming too strong.
This is what caused the friction the night of my porno debut. The simple explanation is that DeDe got upset that Kim and I had such a fabulous time together- -each of us obviously had phenomenal orgasms. My sense on the set that DeDe was jealous was in fact true. It was understandable now, knowing a little of her background, that she was an insecure person with no real friends who most of her life felt alienated from everyone. Having found in Kim one person that she developed affection for and an attachment to left DeDe terrified that it would be taken away from her.
"DeDe, sweetheart, " I said when she gave me a chance to interject, "You must have had an awful time getting to this point in your life! I understand completely where you're coming from."
I leaned over closer to her and put my arms around her, not in a sexual way but to comfort her. I patted her on the back and said,
"You know? I've had a lot of those same feelings too. I always felt like an outsider and, though I did have friendships, I never did connect deeply with anyone. But, I think the difference between you and me is that sex meant a lot to me. It is just that I was never able to really connect with anyone sexually, male or female, until recently. I mean I had a few encounters but, let's face it, I'm no beauty queen those partners were far from satisfactory."