That Ain't No Way To Go

Ronnie Brooks looked at the lipstick message on his bedroom mirror, GOODBYE BABY!

The end had come with no warning. He thought they had a good thing going. Guess things weren't as good as he thought.

Sarah and he were childhood sweethearts. They met in fourth grade and had been friends or boyfriend and girlfriend till they married at twenty one.

Seven years later she was gone like the wind. No fights, no arguments. No clue that she was ready to move on.

At least she hadn't cleaned out the house when she left. The only things missing were her clothes and a few CD's.

He called the bank and checked the account balances in the household checking and joint saving accounts. The checking account was short the amount of her check. Half the joint savings were gone.

He quickly moved all the remaining money into his account and changed the pin number on the computer access.

He then checked the credit cards. The zero balance in the joint account was unchanged, but hers showed several cash advances over the last several days.

Ronnie called and cancelled the joint account.

He looked around the house again for a note. After a through search still no note. But he found charge slips in her closet from a high end lingerie shop from last week. It wasn't her account either.

The name was George Acree, one of her co workers. He was married with young children.

SAME OLD SAD STORY.

9 Months Later

Ronnie Brooks sat at his desk in his home office working on a proposal for a new project.

Leaning back in his desk chair, he thought about the night he found that message on his mirror.

Sarah had sent him an e mail the next day full of excuses for her behavior and why it was all his fault.

"He was more interested in his job than she, he wasn't romantic enough, and he was lousy in bed." She had written. "Plus he had let himself get out of shape and wasn't appealing to her anymore."

She also wanted half the equity in the house and almost all of the furniture. She also wanted him to pay for the divorce because it was all his fault.

Ronnie reread the letter several times and being in possession of an analytical mind he studied each part.

In all honesty he was very interested in his job. His current project had a large payoff, a big bonus and a promotion. Then they would be able to remodel the house the way they wanted and Sara could quit work and have the baby that he had thought they both wanted.

Ronnie had tried to be romantic but Sara had laughed about it. She had said they had been together too long for all that "mushy" stuff.

As far as being a lousy lover, they had both been virgins the first time. Sarah had been unwilling to try new things.

He had been out of shape. But if she had taken time to notice, he had lost thirty pounds and was working out at the gym three times a week. But she had been working late and out with her friends most of the nights he was not traveling and at home. She was preoccupied most of the time.

He had decided that night that she wasn't getting anything that the court didn't force him to give up.

With the note from her admitting her adultery and the fact that she had stolen another woman's husband and their children's father, the court gave her next to nothing.

Boy was she pissed off. She called him up raising hell and calling him all kind of names. He had never realized what a bitch she had become.

When the truth came out in court, her family, who Ronnie had always gotten along with, had disowned her. Her mother called her a cheap slut.

Her sister, Pam, was livid. The man Sarah had stolen was her sister's best friend's husband. They had three children and a fourth on the way.

The husband, George Acree, had soon begged forgiveness and returned home to his family. It came out that Sarah had done most of the seducing.

Her excuse was she wanted something new and different.

Sarah had different now. Now her husband, family and most of her friends gone.

That's what being a selfish bitch will do for you.

The door bell rang, halting his trip into the past.

Opening the front he couldn't believe who was there. Speaking of the devil and he (she in this case) shows up.

'What do you want?" he asked

Looking at the floor she said, "I wonder if we can talk?" she said in a quiet voice.

"Not to be ugly, but I don't see what we have to talk about. You did what you wanted. You played and now you're paying the price." He said

With tears in her eyes, she finally met his gaze. "I know you hate me and you have every right to. What I did to you, my family and to George's family is unforgivable. Mother was right; I was acting like a cheap slut."

"I have no excuse. None. You were a good husband, the very best. All my girl friends were jealous. But I wasn't satisfied. I wanted different. Different I got, in spades."

"I wanted to say how sorry I was about what I did and how I acted. I hope some day you'll at least stop hating me."

"I understand it's too little, too late. But I really do love you. I just took you and your love for granted. She said as she turned to leave.

Damn it. He never could stand to see her cry. It started when she fell off the monkey bars in fourth grade. It killed him to see her cry.

"Sarah, come on in. I'll get you a glass of iced tea." He said

Smiling a teary smile, she walked into the great room.

"Have a seat while I get us some tea." Ronnie said pointing to the sofa as he walked to the kitchen side of the open great room.

Sarah was surprised by all the changes. What had been a series of small dark rooms with an eight foot ceiling were now one large open space with a fireplace, cathedral ceilings and a new modern designer kitchen and large open windows and French doors looking out on a large deck with a covered pool.

"The house looks wonderful, Ronnie." she gasped. "I love this room!"

He looked at her with sad eyes, "You should. Except for a few small change and additions, this is pretty much the design we agreed on before you turned into someone I didn't know."

Tears came to her eyes again. But she straightened her shoulders and dried her eyes.

"You're right. I was someone not even I recognized. I let my selfishness take control. I started hanging out with the wrong crowd and let them do my thinking for me. George fell into the same trap. But he was smart enough to realize he screwed up and saved his family."

"I wasn't that smart. I followed the group like a good little sheep till I fell over the cliff. To late to turn back and try to fix things." She sighed

"But I'm doing better. I got a new job, went back to church and made new friends."

She looked her ex husband in the eye. "But I need to apologize to those I wronged and ask their forgiveness. My minister said that maybe after I'd done that I can forgive myself."

"So I'm here to ask you to forgive me. I know it's too late for us, but if I know you don't hate me, maybe I can move on." She asked

She sighed again. "I've talked to Mom and Pam. It wasn't pleasant. But I think they believed what I said. I know it'll take awhile for them to trust me again. But I'm in for the long haul."

"Pam talked to Ellen, George's wife. It took awhile, but she finally agreed to see me. She let all her hurt and anger out. When she finished, I told her what I told you and my family. In the end she said she couldn't forgive me, but that was her failing. But she didn't hate me anymore. It was more than I expected."

"I hope someday you'll be able to forgive me for throwing your love away, for treating you so badly, and being a bitch in general."

I know it's a lot to ask, but I need to at least make an effort, to try to make you see that I am truly sorry for what I've done."

She looked down at her lap and the tears began to flow. Soon she was shaking from the sobs that racked her body.

Ronnie walked to the sofa and sat down beside her, pulling her into his arms and holding her close.

"I don't hate you. I never have. I hated the things you've done and the way you've acted. I never could hate you. I have too many memories of the good times we spent together, all of the love we shared." He said

"But you're right. It will be a long time till I could trust you again. I believe you're sorry for what you did. But I'm not sure that you're motives are as pure as you are trying to make them out to be." he stated

"You may be sorry that you got caught, and the price you are having to pay. Maybe you're sorry that your family and friends have turned their back on you because of your actions."

Sarah pulled away from her Ex. "You SOB!" she shouted. "How dare you talk to me like that! I come here to apologize to you and you accuse me of being self serving." She glared at him.

"You don't realize how much it galls me to have to crawl on bended knee and apologize to all these people. Knowing I have to degrade myself to get back in their good graces."

"Having to take all the blame, when Pam wasn't woman enough to keep her man. She spent all her time homemaking and having children, not taking care of her man in bed. What a simple cow she was and still is! I could have George any time I want with one phone call." she snorted.

"Of course I don't want him anyway. He was as lousy in bed as you. But he did give good gifts." she laughed

"And you. You're pitiful. I screwed around on you from the beginning. Even in High School. Your old friend Don Adamson took my cherry in the football dressing room while you were out playing. My brother in law James fucked me right before the wedding in the Bride's dressing room. He's been fucking me twice a month since. My fat ugly sister never has figured it out." she giggled

"You're all a bunch of fools. Especially my Bible thumping Mother. I hate her guts. But I do need her money. And when she finally drops dead I can get my share of the inheritance." she smirked

She picked up her purse and she reached the door. "Of course if you tell them I'll deny it. Say that you're trying to get even with me for leaving you."

"BYE, BYE chump."

As she went through the door, Ronnie spoke up. "I forgot to tell you one feature of the remodeling."

"I hold a lot of meetings here and to make sure that there are no misunderstandings about who said what, I installed an automatic video camera system. I starts when someone enters the house and stays on unless I shut it off." He smiled.

"I didn't shut it off. Smile. Your on Candid Camera!" he laughed as he closed the door.