The Good Wife: Resubmission Ch. 01

Gavin watches as I saunter over to his table, his green eyes taking me all in yet never leaving my eyes. For my part, I stay strong, I meet his gaze, refusing to lapse back into the weak seventeen year old. My gaze is cool and steady, meeting his with a profound audacity that I never dared to conceive of at seventeen, a look of desire and lust that he reads easily. He can see that I'm more than I once was and he knows that he'll have a taste, no more than a sip, and then I'm gone, lost to him forever. In that moment, he loses some of his power. He becomes a regular man who thinks with his dick, like so many of my clients, I have him wrapped around my finger.

I don't sit across from him as he planned, but rather next to him, taking even that power away. He's mine. We talk a bit as I sip my drink, a conversation filled with innuendo and double entendres. Gavin is leaning in close and I taunt him with a hand on his thigh, or a touch on his cheek. Before I finish my drink, I take his hand and move it under the folds of my trench coat, letting him feel the lace, nylon, and nakedness beneath. His eyes meet mine as his hand explores further under my jacket, and now, under the cold gaze, there is a hunger. Yes, a hunger for the flesh. I lean back and arch slightly, spreading my legs, as his hands pinch my nipples through the bra, a hard tweak that elicits a stifled sigh. He studies my face as his hand moves down from my chest, gently across my stomach and to my panties. My legs part even more as he rubs gently between my legs, feeling the warmth and wetness. I bite my lip and close my eyes tight, I'm sore and hungry. I take his hand out from under my jacket and kiss his fingers, damp and warm against my lips.

"Let's get out of here." I whisper into his ear.

We finish our drinks and leave. Outside, Gavin starts to ask where we should go, but I cut him off, telling him to get into my car. He gets in the passenger seat, looks at me, expectantly, but I don't say a ward, I just pull away from the bar and start down the road. After a few turns down long forgotten roads, a look of recollection spreads across his face, along with the slightest bit of worry.

"Are we headed there?" he asks, his green eyes void of the usual confidence.

I don't answer, I just look at him and smile slyly.

I turn down a dirt road, a trail actually, the car lurches and heaves as we drive slowly toward that long ago spot. The air is cooler here, almost chilly, beneath the archway created by the trees. Sunlight is permitted in only small and narrow beams, shooting through the green cavern. The area is surreal, it's something from a fairy tale, this type of beauty doesn't belong in this world. The path narrows more and more, branches and brambles scrape along the side of the car. Only toward the end does the path start to widen out, as we approach the clearing, the rocky ground giving way to softer packed dirt blanketed in pine needles. The clearing widens into a large arc, a serene spot in the woods hidden behind layers of trees and undergrowth. In the center of the clearing stands a lone and majestic tree, the same tree that stood when I was a teenager, probable the same one my parents remember. Initials and small carvings adorn the trunk of the tree, growing sparser and sparser the further up you look. Only the truly brave, or very stupid, venture up to higher spots to make their mark to prove that they were there or to declare their love, etc... This was always a spot for teenagers, any given Friday or Saturday there were people gathered here. The police generally left us alone as long as we didn't let the spot get too dirty or start a fire that was too big. Every now and again they'd raid the place and nab a few underage drinkers, but really, I think they did it more for sport than anything.

I hadn't been here since that night when I was 17. It was also the last time that I saw Gavin. I never imagined coming back here, in fact, I had swore to myself that I would never come back here. Not after that night. Now, here I am, and more, I'm here with Gavin in tow.

Gavin is studying me, I can feel his eyes on me, I can feel his uneasiness. I stop the car at the mouth of the clearing, I step out without saying a word and begin to walk. I stop at the spot that I had been placed seventeen years ago, maybe ten feet from the tree. I can still see the men sitting around the tree, watching me, laughing, as I was led on a leash up the trail, crawling on my hands and knees. I wasn't expecting them. Oh, how I wished that I could just crawl away into the dark of the night.

No, I'm not going to let those memories ruin this for me. I'm taking this clearing back for myself, I'm conquering those memories.

I take a step forward, I step out of that seventeen year old girl and back into the woman that I've become. The tree seems to welcome me, to encourage me. Behind me, Gavin is standing near the car, waiting. He's watching me, I can feel his eyes on me. I can sense his unease and guilt hanging thick in the air. Maybe it's been here ever since that night, maintained by the tree, a living breathing monument of the guilt that Gavin carries.

"Come on." I call to Gavin without turning around. I can sense the relief wash over him at the sound of my voice.

Slowly I undo the belt, letting it fall to either side once undone. I pop the large buttons of the coat easily, allowing it to fall open, exposing my almost nakedness. I let my hand touch the tree, tracing one of the initials carved in the thick and rough bark, my old friend.

Behind me, I hear Gavin walking, coming closer, the pine needles crunching softly with each footfall. He stops just behind me, waiting for a moment, breathing in the scent of my hair. The outside air and the anticipation raise goose bumps on the back of my neck and arms, but I don't turn, I wait for Gavin, allowing him to savor this moment. Finally, he gently lifts the coat from my shoulders, holding it as I shrub my arms free, then drops it on the ground beside me.

Gavin moves closer still, his body pressed against my back, he leans down to kiss my neck. His beard is rough against my shoulder and the kiss is soft and light, he stops for just a moment to breath me in, a deep breath, then kisses me yet again. His hands move slowly and softly from my arms to my waist, hooking his thumbs to either side of my panties, he slowly pulls them down, kissing softly along my spine as he kneels. I step out of my panties, careful not to catch them on a heel, then he tosses them on top of my coat.

Before Gavin has a chance to go further, I turn to face him, leaning back against the tree, his face level with my cunt. I reach down, wrapping my fingers tightly through his goatee and draw him up slowly and close to my body. Still holding the course hair, I pull his face toward mine to kiss him deeply, allowing my tongue to dart into his mouth. He returns the kiss hard, pressing his mouth against mine. His hands go up to my head, forcing a deeper kiss, turning my head slightly so our mouths line up better. With my free hand I fumble at his belt and zipper, undoing both, then pulling at the pants button until I feel the button give and the material relax. His pants drop down to his feet as I give one last kiss, still holding his goatee, I push him away slightly, as my free hand finds his cock. I let go of his goatee, reaching down, finding his sack while stroking his half erect cock in my other hand. Careful not to kneel on a root or rock, I go to my knees, staring at his cock, still stroking it gently. Poking out from between the front of his dress shirt it seems almost comical and unreal, a prop or puppet, unattached from his body. I feel it growing in my hand, tightening and firming with each stroke. His skin around his balls tightening and rising as I gently juggle them in my hand. At the base of his cock I tighten my grip, forcing it hard, the head swells and turns red, Gavin breaths in a short and sharp then lets the air out slowly. I study his cock for a moment before letting my tongue lightly trace the line around his head. My grip stays firm as his cock continues to grow. Raising his cock so it's pointed in the air I trace my tongue down the shaft then lick up, like it's some obscene adult lollipop. Gavin's hand fumbles for my head as he concentrates on keeping his balance. His hand finds the back of my head, messing my hair in the process, and pushes slightly, edging my face closer to his cock. I'm not done teasing. I lift his shaft again and push my face against his sack. My tongue massages his balls, his cock resting on my forehead.

"Oh god." Gavin moans as he begins to thrust his pelvis out in a slow rhythmic fashion, rubbing his sack against my mouth and tongue.

I lean back, bringing his cock back down, he presses my head harder, pushing my mouth onto his cock, this time I relent and take his shaft into my mouth. He's fully erect now, the flesh hard and hot in my mouth. My hand is stroking the base of the shaft as I begin to move my mouth up and down the other end, stopping occasionally to let my tongue tease the underside of the head.

Another "Oh god." This one deeper, and accompanied by a grunt.

Gavin begins to thrust harder, more than a blowjob, he's fucking my mouth. I tighten my grip at the base, slowing his thrusts, I don't want him to cum too quickly. Pulling his shaft out of my mouth, I give a last kiss, just on the head, then stand, wiping the small trail of drool and spit from my chin.

I place my hand on his arm as he reaches out to draw me to him, stopping him, I want to do it my way. I lean in to kiss him, gently, a small peck on the lips, then I turn my back to him, bracing my hands against the tree, leaning over slightly, I arch my back, pushing my ass out. I'm offering myself to him, take what you want.

Behind me he fumbles for a moment, stepping out of his trousers in a hurried and clumsy fashion. One leg is turned inside out as it catches on the tip of his shoe. Finally free, he nudges the pants to the side with his foot. I lean down further, arch my back further, placing my cheek against the tree so that I can look back at the last man other than Tom that I would ever fuck.

"Fuck me." I whispered, a command, begging.

Gavin moved closer to me, I could feel his cock, hot and hard, nudge against my leg and slide up along my ass, sending a shiver up my back, making me arch all the more. He leaned over me, pressing a hand against my head, pushing the side of my face hard against the tree as he took his cock in his other hand, guiding it into my sore and expecting cunt. I could feel it go in slightly, I was wet enough that he could just slide in, but he hesitated, pushing it in just a bit, waiting, then thrusting hard, I gasped at the roughness, at the feel of finally having his cock back in me.

The hand pinning my head to the tree was pushing hard, pressing my face into the bark of the tree. It hurt, but I don't mind the pain, I deserve it, it's only right that I feel a bit of pain for what I'm doing to Tom.

Gavin thrusts hard and slow, using his other hand on my ass, holding it steady and he nearly pulls out only to thrust back in. I can't help but to gasp with every thrust, it's not voluntary, I can't help but to make the guttural noise. His cock fills me, and at the end of each thrust he pushes his pelvis forward, his cock sliding just ever so much more into me.

I'm about to cum. I don't want to give Gavin the satisfaction of seeing me cum, wild and uninhibited. No, I hold it in as best I can, I try to withhold it from him. I can't help it though, my breathing picks up, I'm almost panting. My hips, I can't control them, they're thrusting back against him, meeting his cock, welcoming it, begging. I cum. It comes in waves, ripples of shocks, breathing hard through clenched teeth, my cunt, spasming, tightening and loosening around his cock. He knows.

I can see Gavin, he knows that he made me cum, I can see the self satisfied sneer across his face. The look in his eyes is arrogance, it says I own this, this is mine. But he's wrong.

His thrusts are becoming faster and more erratic, not at deep... he's getting ready to cum. I turn quickly, dropping to my knees and take his cock in my mouth. He's wet with my juice, I can taste myself and he thrust his cock into my mouth just as hard as he was thrusting into my cunt. I fight against gagging as his cock rams against the back of my throat. Gavin grabs the back of my head roughly with both hands, grabbing two handfuls of hair, fucking my mouth.

A line of drool connects my chin to my knee, breaking then reforming every time I gasp for air. The wet and slopping sound of his cock drilling into my mouth fills my ears, a distraction from the dull throb where Gavin is pulling my hair.

I feel his cock getting thicker, filling and readying to burst. I suck against his cock, tightening my lips and mouth along his shaft, swallowing. The first spurt makes me want to pull back, the hot and salty goo startles me, then I swallow. I swallow with each spurt. Gavin lets out an animal noise, a grunt and sigh all at once, a bestial noise of satisfaction. He's done.

Gavin's cock slowly goes limp in my mouth as he stops thrusting, his hands relaxing in my hair. I continue to suck hard, pulling out the last of his cum, swallowing down cum and drool. My eyes wander up to stare into his half-closed eyes. The sneer is replaced by a smile, his hard look softened and relaxed. His hands, once holding my hair tight, now rubbing the gently, combing my hair with his fingers. I take his shrinking cock in my hand as I pull my mouth away, stroking firmly, milking out the last few drops. Gavin shivers as I lick the small clear droplets away from his cock, swallowing down the last of his cum.

It's over.

My knees are shaky as I stand up slowly, grabbing my bra and coat as I do. I don't need to put the bra back on, the coat will cover me just fine for the trip home. The liner of the coat is cool and soft against my skin, teasing my nipples, turning them into hard little rocks.

Gavin watches in silence as I dress myself, straightening my jacket, combing my hair with my fingers, never looking at him. Eventually he picks his pants up from the ground, smacking pine needles and dirt from the material before slowly stepping back into them, his knees just as shaky as mine.

"What now Julie?" he asks when he's dressed.

"Now we go back." I explain, "I'll drop you off at your car and we go back to our old lives and never mention this. This was a onetime thing, it will never happen again, and we will never see each other again, understand?"

Gavin was silent for a long moment, studying my face, searching for even the least amount of doubt or uncertainty. He wouldn't find it, I've steeled myself. I took back what was mine, what should never have been taken from me.

"Ok." He shrugs, a look of hurt passes across his face, "For what it's worth, I'm sorry Julie, I'm sorry for what happened."

Now it's my turn to study his face, to look for the cracks or hint of a lie. But no, he's sincere. The sudden apology surprises me, catching me off my guard. I want to run to him, to throw myself into his arms, hold him tight, and cry, but I can't. I can't do that, I can't imagine how that ends. I can't look at him either, I don't want him to see me fighting back tears. I don't want him to know how hurt I was or how I needed to hear him say those words. Instead, I walk back to the car, ignoring the apology. In the car I wipe my eyes quickly as Gavin stands in the clearing, taking it in for one last time, maybe the slightest look of disappointment in his usually hard glare.

It's over.

We drive back to the bar in an awkward silence, but it's better than filling the air with the noise of idle and empty chatter. He kisses me gently in the bar parking lot, before getting out to retrieve his car. With the slam of my car door, Gavin disappears from my life once more. I pull away from the bar, my house is only a few miles down the road. All the memories come flooding back and I fight back the tears, the feeling of humiliation and fear are still right there, but they've dissipated somehow, it's not as intense a feeling. At home I go right to the shower and wash away the sex and sin. I'm clean now, healed maybe, and ready for a life with Tom.

That was my plan.

That's not what happened.

Everything started the same way: I dressed in a lacy bra and panty set with stocking under my raincoat; the bar was the same, dark and with just a few raggedy patrons; and Gavin was sitting alone in his suit sipping on three fingers of scotch, a glass of my own waiting at the empty chair across from him. I walked to his table, slow and sultry, just as I planned, sweeping past the chair to sit beside Gavin. Then he stops me, "No." he puts out his hand, preventing me from sitting next to him, "Sit across from me." He motions toward the empty chair with the scotch sitting in front of it. From there, the story radically changes.

I sit across from him as I'm told, slightly annoyed at Gavin for interrupting my plan and at myself for reverting back to that submissive little girl, always doing what he tells me.

"Have a drink." He nods toward the scotch in front of me.

Again, I do as I'm told. I want the drink, but he tells me to drink and I do it. I feel small again, submissive and subservient. I take a small sip, savor the taste, then take another small sip.

From there we make small talk and finish our drinks. Another round of scotch and some more idle chatter, a dance of sorts, avoiding the reason that we're here. We talk about the weather and work, reminisce about the local area and how much its changed, the droll and bland conversation of acquaintances. I become distinctly aware of my nakedness under my coat, feeling self conscious and exposed. How could I possibly have thought that my plan would work?

Gavin gets up to retrieve a third round of scotch from the bar. As he returns, he sets both drinks down on his side of the table, "Come here." It's an order more than a request. I do as I'm told, hating myself.

He looks me over as I spin the glass of scotch nervously, I feel small in the gaze of his cold green eyes, "Open up your coat." Another command.

For a moment I get excited, maybe my plan was simply delayed and not dashed after all. As I had planned, I grab his hand, leading it through the folds of material to feel my nakedness beneath. Gavin's hand is warm, stroking up and down my leg, exploring the stockings and up to my panties, tracing the line of lace from my him to between my legs, I do my best to contain a shudder that runs through me at his touch.

"I didn't say to let me feel you up." His green eyes boring into my own, "I said to open your coat."

I pause for a minute feeling my heart rate jump, old feeling of humiliation creeping back. I feel my face redden but my hands betray me, without realizing it, I feel my fingers working at the belt. Slowly and deliberately I undo each of the buttons on my coat, my eyes sweeping across the bar to see if anyone is watching. All undone, I open the coat slightly, exposing my bra and the top if my panties. The air in the bar is cool against my stomach, I shiver, not sure if it's because of the air or because of how exposed I feel.

Gavin looks at me, appraising me with the slightest of smiles, "Very nice." He compliments, reaching under the table to spread my legs wide, "Very nice indeed."

The coat slips away from me a little more as my legs spread, again, I scan the room to make sure no one can see. The bar is dark, but not dark enough.

"So, this is what you came here for." His hand moving from my thigh back to his drink. I start to close my legs again, but he stops me, "No, keep them like that."