The Honeymoon Ch. 04

"You've still got a couple of years," she said, but it was a good lesson. She had never thought about it before--what reason would she have?--but of course he would need time to recharge. Semen didn't grow on trees, after all. "In that case, let's just have a quiet night with no... frisky business."

It was a good and sensible resolution; and, like many resolutions, it was harder to keep than it was to make. She felt sweaty and overdressed in her pajamas; the fact that she had seen Patrick get into bed with no clothes on whatsoever didn't help things. Patrick, too, found it difficult to focus. He needed the rest, that much was certain... But his wife's luscious body was right there, and lying there spooned up to her without getting to touch her in any other way just seemed so... lame. He kept his hand on her belly for as long as possible, but eventually he couldn't stand it and moved it up to her breast. When he did, she gave a gasp, and she realized just how much she had wanted it. It felt like the answer to a prayer.

"Maybe..." she whispered. "Maybe if we're quiet."

"I know just the thing," he whispered.

His hands did their marvelous work, and soon she was wet and wanting. She was glad to struggle free of the confining clothing, to bare herself to the world and his hands. Now she could feel: his muscles at her back, his weapon between her legs, the skin of his arms all down her front. She expected him to turn her onto her back and move between her legs, but his solution surprised her: instead of any negotiations, he simply lifted her top leg and then poised himself at her entrance. And, just like that, they were joined.

Most of their sex today had been physical, athletic, almost fierce; this was completely different. This was intimate, gentle, almost spiritual. She bent her hips back to give him more access, but soon changed her mind; she would rather feel him all down her back, mold every inch of her flesh to him. He couldn't achieve as much depth from here as he normally could, but she didn't care about that either. It lasted much longer than before--was he depleted, or was it because of the slower nature of their movements?--but she didn't care. And when he reached for her clit--perhaps mindful of what they'd learned at dinner--she gently led his hand away. "No," she said, "I just want to feel this."

They rocked back and forth in the timeless language of love. She felt the stern muscles in his arm across her belly, the warm roughness of his palm cupping her breast. She heard the almost-silent moans of his pleasure, felt his breath ruffling through her hair. She felt his body all down her back, from the sensitive spot at the top of her rump all the way up to her neck, at the tender place that hair normally hid; she felt his kisses there, on her ear, her jaw, her neck, her shoulder. His cock was inside her, caressing her, stroking her, opening her up; she felt the push and pull, felt herself responding to his body and his to hers; felt the unmistakable sensation of caressing him with her body, and thought that she would melt with love. She whispered to him, telling him how good he felt, how much she loved what he was doing. And when his climax finally came, almost soundless in the night, she pushed her hips back to engulf him as much as possible, to bring him and his seed as deep inside her as she could.

He fell out of her as they slept, but that didn't stop them from doing it again in the morning. And this time if Kerri knocked on their door, they didn't hear it.

It was the most decadent day of her life. She and Patrick barely left the bed, except to use the bathroom and to receive room service. She put on a robe, once, to accept their lunch; dinner they must have fucked through, because to her knowledge it never arrived. All the rest of the time they were in bed, either napping between sessions, making love or sometimes--there was just no other word for it--fucking. She climaxed more times than she could count, and he gave her his seed again and again. Sometimes she felt as though her muscles were turning to jelly; at others she was fired up, almost angry in her need for his marvelous organ. They did it in every way imaginable: slowly, quickly; passionately, quietly; missionary, cowgirl, doggie-style, spooning, sixty-nine. She couldn't decide which one was her favorite: she loved to be on top and in control; she loved to be under him, subservient; she loved to be taken like an animal; she loved gentle intimacy; she loved to have his mouth on her, and to take him into her mouth and make him squirt. She loved the feeling of warm contentment after an orgasm; the quivering sense of anticipation and need right before he plunged, the delirious sense of completion when he filled her; the slick heat of his cum in her pussy. She loved it all. She couldn't believe that she was here, doing this, being so wanton; another part of her seemed to feel that she had been meant to be this way all along.

Would they have done the same thing the next day? She would never know, because before they could start, Kerri and Winston knocked on their door. "Okay, sleepy-heads, rise and shine! You had all day yesterday to laze around in bed; today we're getting you out!"

By now Amanda was far past the point of shame; but she did still feel a pang of guilt. She kept abandoning her sister--a lazy, selfish thing to do. Was she really so easily distracted?

Evidently, Kerri had similar irritations, because her face was wan. That in itself was unusual; Kerri rarely went anywhere without her bright smile. Patrick's comments on the situation didn't reassure her much. "Look, umm... Winston says it would be great if you would spend some time with Kerri. Evidently she's in a... Well, I don't even know. But she needs her friend right now."

"Then her friend she shall have," Amanda said.

Of course, this too was easier said than done. Throughout the last few days, Kerri had taken charge of their outings and activities, and frankly this was all to the good: now that she stopped to think about it, Amanda wasn't at all sure what would interest Kerri. And Kerri herself was indifferent; to each suggestion she gave a tired shrug. Amanda realized that Kerri had faced much this same behavior from Amanda herself, not too long ago; the thought only strengthened her resolve. She was going to be a good friend to Kerri if it killed her.

Finally she got Kerri suited up for a day on the beach, something they definitely hadn't done yet. Once outdoors, with sun and sand and laughter and the roar of waves like the breathing of some great mother earth, Kerri seemed to perk up a little. Still, her conversations had a distracted air that made Amanda nervous. Kerri was cheerful and outgoing, but she had never had trouble focusing before. Still, Amanda battled down feelings of inadequacy and led them both down the beach until they had reached an area of relative seclusion, far enough away from the resort that few people ventured this far. They spread their towels and sat down.

"So, what's going on?" Amanda said.

Kerri gave her a look. "That's it? That's your whole small-talk effort? You're just gonna... Plunge in, and that's that?"

Amanda returned the look. "Kerri, I'm not good at this stuff. You know that. But you're my friend. I care. And if I can help you, I want to."

"Yeah, you're my friend," Kerri said. "When you're not fucking draped all over your husband."

"And you don't do that on occasion either?" Amanda said. "Kerri, I love you like a sister, but I've known--for a while now--that I'm not your best friend anymore. And you know what? That's as it should be. When you met Winston... I mean, your whole life changed. Suddenly there was this corner of it--a big corner--that I wasn't invited into. And, as I said, that's to the good. You should have things that you share only with Winston. He's your husband, for heaven's sake. You're going to make a life together that has nothing to do with me. And I'm going to do the same with Patrick. Don't tell me you resent me for that, because you and I both know that isn't true."

"Isn't it?" said Kerri. "Maybe I don't like being shut out of your life like that. Maybe I wanna be part of it."

Amanda gave her a skeptical look. "Of the sex? Of the child-bearing? Of arguing over who does the dishes, or what the right trash schedule is, or whether it's okay to leave the toilet seat up? You don't need to come to us for that, you'll get it on your own."

Kerri glared at her in defiance for a moment; but then the facade collapsed, and she sighed and seemed to deflate back down to the towel. "Okay, fine, whatever. So I'm unreasonably annoyed at you. So sue me."

"I will do no such," Amanda said. "We're sisters. It doesn't have to make sense. Now, do you want to tell me what's going on?"

Kerri sighed. "Well, the fact that you're so wrapped up with Patrick is not helping. I've been wanting to talk to you since Wednesday. I was hoping that, when we went on that bus tour of the island... But no, you were just making out the whole time."

"I know," said Amanda. "I'm sorry about that. I just... It's a powerful thing that was unlocked. I'm sure you of all people would understand."

"Yeah, I understand," Kerri grumped, "it's just... Inconvenient. I mean, how'm I supposed to talk to you if you're just face-first into him all the time."

"Do what you did today," Amanda said. "Ask. I'm never too busy to talk to you."

For the first time all day, Kerri gave a smile. "Even if you're with Patrick and he's balls-deep in you?" It was more like a smirk, but still, it was there.

"Even then," Amanda promised with exaggerated solemnity. "...Of course, I might ask you to wait until we're done," she added, and got another little smile from Kerri. "But the moment I got my clothes on, you'd be first on my list."

"Well, you've got your clothes on now," Kerri said.

"Yes, I have," said Amanda, "and here I am, asking what's wrong. But you're waffling now."

Kerri gave her a glare. "It's not easy for me. This stuff is..."

"Take all the time you need," said Amanda. "I mean, I'm here all day."

Kerri gave her a twisted smile and then looked out over the sea.

"It started... I think it started on Tuesday night," she said, not looking at Amanda. "When you... When you asked us to stay on hand in case you needed help."

"...Okay..." said Amanda, who could not imagine how this could change anything. "And... Something... Well, I mean, I don't even know. What was going on?"

Kerri closed her eyes, took several breaths with a grimace on her face. "I just... Seeing you. Seeing you made a difference."

Amanda squinted at her. "What, did we turn ugly when we were doing it?"

It was meant as a joke, to lighten the mood, but Kerri said, "No, actually, quite the opposite. It was... You were beautiful. I saw you and Patrick and I thought that it was... I mean, there was something..." Finally she turned to look at Amanda. "It was like a sacrament."

Amanda said nothing.

"I mean, you guys were doing it, yeah, and there's all the, what, the squick involved in sex--all the wet and messy stuff, and the funny faces, and everything. But... It was like you guys transcended that. You were there, and you loved him, and he loved you, and that was so much more important than all the physical clumsiness of sex. You really... You really love each other. When you guys do it, it's about your partner, it's about making them happy. And I just..." She croaked to a halt, and Amanda was startled to see tears in her eyes. "I just looked at Winston, and I'm like... 'Where is that? Where do we have that? Why don't we--' "

"Whoa, whoa, hold on there. Kerri, you... You married Winston. Are you trying to tell me that you, you don't... That you don't love--"

"Of course I'm not trying to say that, how stupid do you think I am," Kerri snapped. "I love him more than life itself. No, I wouldn't marry him unless I felt that way. But it just..." She sighed. "We never do what you guys do. We never... I mean, I love sex. I love to climax, and I love to make him climax, and... When we first started doing it, it was so good, there was like... Chemistry up the wazoo, and I... Yeah, I was like how you are. Couldn't get enough of it. But with us it's so... Physical. We're chasing orgasm. That's all we do. And I looked at what you and Patrick were doing, and how selfless you were, and how, how radiant you were in that love, and I was like... 'Where is that? Where is that in our lives?' "

"I see," said Amanda.

"And the thing is, you're right," Kerri gasped, beginning to cry in earnest now. "With Winston it's always been this way, and I don't know how to change it or even if I can, and now it's like... 'Okay, I just married this guy, and what if I'm stuck with this kind of sex for...' " And that was the end of speech, as Amanda opened her arms to her and Kerri cried on her shoulder. Amanda wasn't sure what to say, so she said nothing, trying to indicate with her arms and her patience and her love that she was there, and not going away.

Finally Kerri had cried herself out; she pulled back and wiped her eyes. "Oww. That stings. Never cry when you're wearing sunscreen." She laughed a little and blinked a few times. "Okay."

"Okay," said Amanda.

"So I just... I dunno. I just... became aware that there was this whole other part of life that I didn't have, and, I want it, and... I don't know what to do."

"And it clearly matters to you, if it's been disturbing your equilibrium like this," said Amanda. "What about the rest of your relationship with Winston? Are you happy with that?"

Kerri thought for a moment. Then she nodded. "It's not like... I mean, we just... We talk. We learn about each other. We spend time together. You know us, we've been living together for a year, and we just... It's gotten comfortable, you know? We know each other really well. We don't... I mean, I don't even know how to describe it. But it feels like we've been together for way longer."

"Do you regret marrying him?"

"Regret marrying him?" Kerri exclaimed. "Of course not! He..." Her voice turned pensive. "I can't imagine living without him. He completes me. I know you... I know you Christians don't believe in destiny, or whatever, but I'm convinced that... That he and I were meant for each other."

"We may not believe in destiny, but we believe that God has a plan," Amanda said, smiling. "And I've seen you and Winston together. If that wasn't in God's plan, then clearly He adjusted it when you two got together. I just feel bad for whoever you were supposed to get together with, because he got the short end of the stick."

Again, it was meant to elicit laughter, but Kerri took it in an unexpected way. "God, can you imagine? If I had gotten together with someone who wasn't Winston? I can't. I mean, I just... I look at that, and all I see is a featureless void."

"Seriously? You can't... I mean, you can't imagine a single thing?"

"No, not at all," said Kerri. "I mean, it... He wouldn't be Winston, right? But I can't imagine anything else about him. Like, how could I love someone who wasn't Winston? How could I be happy? Everything about him would irritate me."

Amanda smiled. "Well, I think you picked the right person then."

A slow, wistful smile touched Kerri's face. "Yeah. ...Except for this sex thing."

"Well... Have you talked to him about it?" said Amanda.

"God no. I mean, how am I supposed to talk to him about that? 'Hey, honey, now that you're balls-deep in me, can we have a heart-to-heart about how we fuck?' " She snorted. "Like that's gonna go over well."

"Well, first off, there's something," Amanda said. "You guys fuck a lot, right?"

Kerri gave her a look. "I can't believe you just said that word. Isn't there a commandment or something saying not to swear?"

"Well, what am I supposed to say? 'Have athletic sex that focuses mostly on physical sensation'? That's a mouthful. Why don't I just use the word that already exists for that kind of sex? It happens to be a bad word, but you know what? That's just life. 'Sex' is practically a bad word. So no, I'm not swearing--I'm being precise. Because you guys do mostly fuck, right?"

Kerri's eye twitched, but she said, "Yeah, that... That would be accurate. Why?"

"Because when I think about what Patrick and I do, I think the term 'make love' is a better description. What we do isn't about... Well, it is about the pleasure, but that's secondary. We're enjoying each other's bodies, and sharing our bodies, and being... intimate."

"Really intimate."

"Well, yeah," Amanda said. "I mean, that was the whole point of waiting until marriage. It's such an intimate thing, such a private thing... I mean, I'm glad that I waited until marriage. I'm glad that Patrick will be the only man I ever share my body with. That makes it so much more sacred."

Kerri conceded that with a nod of her head. "Well, unfortunately Winston and I don't have that option. Neither of us were virgins when we met each other. But experience has its own advantages." She gave Amanda a sidelong glance. "As I'm sure you're aware of by now."

"God, you're telling me," Amanda said. "You'd think they'd teach us these things or something."

"What, you'd want to take a class in it?" Kerri said. "5th-grade Sex Ed?"

"Heck no!" Amanda said. "I... You know, that's a good point. How would they teach us. But they could at least stop discouraging us from it."

"As we discussed on Wednesday night."

"Yeah. But, that isn't really what we're talking about right now. The point is..." She caught herself with a laugh. "God, what a reversal. How come you're asking me for advice? Hasn't it been the other way around for the last entire week?"

"So it's your turn to be a friend," said Kerri, sticking her tongue out, "instead of leeching off my wisdom for a week. Ha, how does that feel?"

"...I'll answer after you try what I suggest!" Amanda said, and Kerri laughed for the first time all day.

"All right then, O Wise Giver Of Advice," said Kerri. "What do you suggest?"

"I think you should sit him down and talk about it," Amanda said. "Don't be like... I mean, this is common sense, but it bears repeating: don't be all like, 'Oh, you're such a bad lover, you don't satisfy me, accuse accuse accuse.' Just... Tell him you want to try something new."

Kerri grimaced. "I dunno if that'll work." At Amanda's questioning look: "Just... I mean, we've been sleeping together for a long time. From the beginning, it's been this way. Fucking, instead of making love. I don't know if we've ever made love. And so, I don't know if he'll..."

"Maybe you'll have to teach him," Amanda said. "Which sounds daunting, probably, but then you've been teaching me all this time and it's worked out so far."

"But it's not just sex," Kerri said, "it's... I mean, you guys do PDA all the time." At Amanda's questioning look: "Public Displays of Affection. You guys aren't ashamed to show your love where other people can see it."

"Well, I should hope not," Amanda said. "What's to be ashamed about?"

Kerri gave a grimace. "The point is, he's not... Winston isn't... Demonstrative like that. I mean, I know that he loves me--I'm not even sure how I know, but I do. But... I just..."

"You want him to show it."

"No, that's the thing, he does show it. But... I want him to show it... A different way."

"By being more... gentle?"

"Yeah. Maybe a little more cuddly, and not so much... I mean, sex is selfish sometimes. We don't even really pay attention to each other sometimes--we're just both in the room, and his thing's in my you-know, so we're sharing, but it's my job to get myself off. And his to get himself off. And... Well, that works, because I'm better at getting myself off than he is--which is just natural. That's how sex works. You'll always know yourself better than Patrick will know you, and vice versa. So I get to climax really, really hard, and there's something to be said about that. But sometimes I want..."