They Are A-OK Ch. 35

It was late when I got back to the house. I had hoped that none of the staff would be around, but I should have known that Steven would be waiting to serve my needs. I came in a side door and used a back stairway off the kitchen. As I made my way down the hall to what I considered my room, Steven emerged from one of the guest rooms.

"Good evening, Sir, I trust you had a pleasant time while you were out," He said in a way that told me he knew that I was out fucking.

"It was a good evening, thank you. I am surprised to find you on duty considering the hour and Adam's absence," I said hoping to shift the conversation.

"When Mr. Donaldson is away I generally stay in the main house around the clock, sir."

"I see."

"May I be of assistance with anything tonight?" He asked in way that made me wonder what if any limits there were to the assistance he was willing to provide.

I knew he had a thing for young men. It was likely that he had not been intimate with anyone not of the island in a long time. I briefly wondered if he might miss his days with Lord Marlboro's son. I am still not sure what made me ask him to help me prepare for bed.

"Of course, sir, would you like me to prepare a bath?"

I had not taken a bath since I was prepubescent, but something about the idea of Steven assisting me or even just watching me bathe caught my fancy. I accepted his offer and we went into my room together.

Being helped to undress by Adam's valet was not the awkward experience it had once been. I wondered if all of those months of having all of my intimate needs done for me in the hospital had changed me. I decided the reason for my comfort was unimportant as I stood there naked watching Steven carry my dirty clothes away. A minute later I followed him to the bathroom where he was fussing over the temperature of my bath water. I tested it with my fingers and assured him it was perfect. After I slipped into the tub he asked if there was anything else he could do. Again I wondered if there was any limit to what I could ask of him.

"Well, I don't guess I really need anything. I have been washing myself for some years now," I said trying to get the nerve to ask him to talk with me.

"If you like, I can assist with that, Sir," He offered as if asking him to wash my nuts would be a normal thing to do.

"No thank you, but would you mind sitting and talking with me. I have some questions on my mind."

"I would be happy to sit and talk with you. Watching you bathe would give me pleasure," He said with an odd sort of smile.

"Tonight, I was with one of the islanders. He is a very sweet young man who has some conflicts over sexual issues," I said all but ignoring his admission that watching me bathe would be pleasurable.

"That is not unusual for the young men of the island, sir. Though outwardly they are rather open and free sexually, there are many rigid rules which cause them to feel conflicted about certain feelings and desires."

"You may understand the situation better than I do."

"Perhaps; is the young man conflicted over homosexual desires?"

"I think there is some conflict, but he has managed to put it in a place that works for him. But there are family dynamics that are complicating his thinking."

"All family groups on the island have complications, sir. I know at first it seems to be a paradise in many ways. Not the least of which is the sexual freedom the islanders embrace. But in some ways things are even more repressed here than in our modern world. Things are regimented and the open sexual freedom given to youth more often than not gives rise to feelings and desires that conflict long held customs."

"I have seen that and I hope to understand the islanders better in the future. But this family has other issues, some of which I am not sure my young friend even knows about."

"If you were willing to tell me what young man you are speaking about I might be better able to help you. I am close to a few of the young men on the island"

"It is Nateal, the young dock worker."

"Carmella's son?" He asked sounding surprised as I finished washing.

"Yes, does that bother you?" I asked concerned that I had stepped into a situation.

"No, it is just I am very close to her and she has confided many things to me," He replied as he took a plush towel and held it up for me.

I stood and let him dry my upper body before stepping onto the bathmat. Talking while having my cock, balls and ass gently dried by a valet turned out to be impossible. After I was safely in a robe, I continued my questions.

"Steven, I am sure I probably know most if not all of the things she has discussed with you. I have been intimate with all of her children and they have confided much to me. I would appreciate if we could talk more about the family. They are important to me and I want to be certain I do all I can to help them."

"John, the truth is I am dismayed for my friend to hear that she may have two sons that prefer the company of men sexually. She has been very distraught over her oldest son's admission of homosexuality."

"I know. I have spoken to her about Greg's needs. I can assure you that Nateal is not gay. He desires to live as island society expects. He has already chosen his mate."

We were back in my bedroom and Steven was looking perplexed.

"I don't see what the problem is in that case."

"Steven, I have fucked all three of the younger members of the family as well as the father. Carmella accepts her husband's apparently recently blossomed bisexuality while rejecting her son's needs. In addition, there is something I am not sure you know regarding the parentage of the children. The situation has me confused and concerned that I have somehow contributed to the family's woes."

"I know that Alicia is not Duarte's daughter and Greg is not Carmella's son, at least in the physical sense. But they are a family and they all feel a family bond. I am sorry what sort of pajamas do you prefer."

"I sleep naked and there is a thing that I doubt Carmella has shared with you regarding those family feelings."

"Take care in sharing any secrets you believe you know, Sir," He counseled.

"I would not share it with another except that I need your advice. It is clear you care about the family as I do. I trust that what I tell you will not leave this room."

"You can rely on that, sir."

"Alicia and Greg have been lovers and not in a way that islanders might consider appropriate sibling play."

Steven looked truly shocked.

"How could they? Incest is more universally decried on the island than homosexuality. There is even an old island law that requires very harsh punishment."

"It is of no matter they are not related and therefore no incest occurred."

"Did they know that they were not brother and sister when they fucked?"

"One did, one did not," I replied in a soft sad tone.

"And Carmella knows about them fucking?"

"Yes."

"Then they have committed great sin and this is likely what weighs on her. Greg has doubly rejected her beliefs. But why are you so troubled? These things are not your doing."

"Because I fear that I have added to Nateal's confusion. I went to see him tonight intent on making him recognize his desires for what they were and not some silly play as he has convinced himself. He admitted feelings for another young man under pressure from me. Then I showed him how wonderful lovemaking between men can be."

"John, I know you think that you have created problems for Nateal. But I am sure he would not have been with you had he not already felt things that he is taught are forbidden."

"I have no doubt of that, Steven. But had I been a better man, I would not have pressed things and made his conflicts worse."

"Perhaps, but we are carnal beings. I know Adam loves you dearly and thinks you are very special. He would not think that way toward a bad person. Your coming to me in the hopes of helping Nateal and his family reinforces that you are indeed a good person. Giving into our natural sexual urges can not make us bad people. Sadly, I have no magic words that will fix these things and help ease your guilt. All I can do is go on supporting my friend Carmella through these trials and support her children in anyway I can. I hope this helps."

"My guilt will pass but not because of anything you say or do. It will pass because that is what always happens. I am glad to know that the family has such a kind man to help them. Thank you, Steven."

Steven took my robe and then tucked me as if I was a small child after he openly ogled my naked body. For a second I considered asking him if he wanted to do more than look. But I was exhausted and he showed no outward signs of wanting more than looking. He left me to contemplate the question of whether I was a good man or not. It was a question I could not answer. I was convinced that forcing Nateal to look deeper into his homosexual desires had been the right thing until I had already begun the task. I realized all I had done was make an already confusing situation far worse. I hoped that Steven was right and that I had not done any damage. What I decided was that my staying on the island would not help anyone. I knew I would go on using Greg, Nateal and Alicia as well as others for my pleasure. The islanders did not see sex and romance the way I did. I had let Alicia and Greg develop feelings for me and for good measure I had led Nateal into a new level of homosexual experimentation. I feared it would take little more time for him too to develop an emotional attachment to me.

Adam's expectation of an extended period with me complicated matters. Without all the other temptations and tricky situations several weeks on the island with him would have been blissful. There were so many on the island that I had fucked or might possibly soon fuck as well as my friends at school and my unexplored feelings for Julia to consider. During a primarily sleepless night I resolved to tell Adam that I wanted to return to school and the AOK house to finish my recuperation. As I knew it would be my conversation with Adam was very difficult. I could see the hurt in his eyes as I explained that I wanted to leave the island much sooner than he planned.

"John, I don't understand. Don't you want to be with me?" He asked with what appeared to be the beginnings of tears in his eyes.

"Adam, I love you and if this was only about you and me, I would be elated to spend the rest of my days here with you. But you and I are not men who can limit our appetites. I need to separate myself from certain situations for a time. I simply can not be on this island and be the man I want to be."

His next question led me to explain in detail everything that concerned me. I told him every aspect of nearly every sexual encounter or thought I had had about people on the island. I explained my fears and concerns. When I was done, he assured me that I was a good person.

"John, like me you are a very sexual being. We are both compelled by nature to enjoy sex in all its variety. I see nothing wrong with this and you should not feel bad for taking pleasure with people who willingly take pleasure with you. You have never forced or even coerced anyone to have sex. I do not see how you have caused anyone but yourself pain."

"What about Nateal?"

"If you have related things as they really are, I think you may in the long run have lessened his pain and confusion. I have helped many young men leave the island so that they could embrace their true nature. All were sad to go and miserably conflicted. No one had ever told them it was ok to make love to another man. You have done that for Nateal. Hopefully, he will feel freer to explore his desires now."

"That is bull shit and you know it! He was happy to play with his friends in the woods secretly as he went on to his proscribed life on the island. So what if he is really gay? What does it matter? His brother is gay and has admitted it and he still will never be happy. Leaving the island is worse for them then living a lie!" I practically wailed, feeling more disgusted with myself and angry at Adam for trying to make excuses for me.

"I guess we won't solve this with talk. I only hope time will heal your wounds. I will not stop you if you want to leave. But please spend a few days here with me. I promise to keep you so sexually exhausted that you will not be tempted to fuck anyone else," He said with more than a hint of sadness in his voice.

I agreed to stay until the end of the following week and he said that he hoped I would change my mind and stay longer. Our talk was over and the only thing left was to make love. We went up to his room and for one of the few times ever he was the aggressor. I stood almost motionless as he undressed me. After removing his own clothes he led me to the shower. He washed my body from head to toe and then instructed me to wash his. After we dried off he took my hand and led me to his bed. He sat on the edge and then told me to get on my knees between his legs. I am still not sure how we managed that complete role reversal so smoothly.

He lifted his legs onto my shoulders and ordered me to lick his balls. I lowered my lips to his warm nut sack and complied with his request without saying a word. Whatever he wanted of me that night was his for the asking. I soon learned he would not be asking for anything. Every word out of his mouth that evening was a demand. I felt his ankles press into my shoulders as he shifted his body. His ass was off the bed and raised slightly. Even though I knew what the next demand would be, I continued to concentrate my attention on making love to his testicles. It was his show and he would have to give the order. When it came there was no attempt to use euphemisms or niceties.

"Lick my asshole like you lick that whore Alicia's cunt!" He demanded.

His calling Alicia a whore caused a shiver to run along my spine. I could almost feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. Had any other man said that to me, he would be laying in a pool of his own blood as I pummeled him senseless. But I knew Adam's words were only a part of something he rightly believed I needed. There was no doubt that I was going to be degraded mentally as well as sexually. I placed my hands on his buttocks and spread them wide, fully exposing his always open male pussy. Adam had the most unusual asshole I had ever seen. His was no tight little rosebud. I assumed that he had been taking large cocks for so long that his sphincter was simply permanently stretched open.

As I licked his asshole and followed his demands to push my tongue into his rectum, I reflected on what I knew of Adam's sexuality and sexual history. There was his mentor in college; a man that was clearly rough and degrading. But that wasn't his first master. Adam told me amazing tales of being dominating and abused throughout his youth. He had come to the AOK through a lover his first year at college. The lover was a senior who seduced and dominated Adam for a few months before introducing him to Daniel Culbertson. The older man took Adam under his wing and then arranged for him to pledge AOK. After a very successful pledge semester where he was thoroughly tested Adam quickly rose to the top. With Culbertson's help he became wealthy after college but never lost his love of being used and degraded. As he continued to degrade me I began to wonder if he was trying to provoke me into a violent attack or merely feeding me something he thought I needed.

"That's right bitch, stick that tongue deep inside me, just like you licked the insides of that nasty slut's hot well fucked cunt. She is so easy, loves to be taken. Just like her brothers love to be fucked. Oh yes, lick my hole the way you licked that little faggot Nateal's tight boy pussy! Oh god give me that tongue slut!"

I had no idea what his game was at that point. In my heart I felt I deserved anything he wanted to say. But something snapped. He had gone too far. I leapt to my feet and grabbed his ankles, practically lifting him into the air. Had I not been blinded by my rage I might have seen the glee in his eyes when I became the aggressor.

"Fuck you, you god damn, pansy ass, fucking pussy wimp cunt! I am going to fuck your damn asshole pussy so hard it will tear open!" I wailed as I drove my knee into his left buttock.

Almost instantly a bruise formed on his ass cheek. But he didn't protest.

"Is that what you wanted; to be shown what a dirty little fag cunt you really are, Adam?" I howled as I drove my knee into his other buttock while pushing his legs over his head.

"As always, I am yours to do as you please, sir," He moaned and he took over holding his legs over his head.

I guided my cock to his ass hole and rammed it ball deep with only my spit for lube. He cried out his joy as I began driving my cock in and out of his body. As I fucked him I slapped his ass and hips hard with my open hand.

"You dirty fucking piece of crap. You have no right to speak of these sweet people like that. It is you and me that are bad. We are the fucking faggot, cock sucking sexual scum!" I screamed as I fucked him harder.

At some point during my assault he came violently. He seemed to be convulsing as his cock exploded like a fountain sending spurts of his thick cum skyward. My only reaction was to continue pounding my cock in and out of his convulsing rectal canal. When I finally came I was spent both physically and emotionally. I fell to the floor in a fetal position. As I lay there in an ever tightening ball, I struggled to find some meaning in what had just happened.

I supposed that Adam was trying to show me that I had not been evil with my island lovers by bringing out the darkest of my urges. But bruising Adam's body while ripping his ass open with my cock, did not make me feel any less morally corrupt. Had I had any energy left I might well have run from that room to the high cliffs of the island and flung myself into the sea. As the idea that I had to get off the island crystallized in my mind, Adam joined me on the floor. He caressed me as he pressed his body next to mine.

Then he whispered, "I love you," As his lips softly touched my cheek.

"How can you love a monster like me?" I asked as tears began to stream down my face.

"You are no monster, John. You're caring and loving, maybe too loving. Like me and many others you find sexual pleasure in things some can't understand. But that is not monstrous. You are destined to be a great man."

"I should have died in that fucking car, Adam! All I do is hurt people who I imagine I am in love with. Shit look what I did to you!"

"You only did what I wanted, what I goaded you into doing."

"Why did you taunt me? You had to know that I would do anything you wanted."

"I could never ask for that treatment. I want it and I need it, but it has to come from the dark recesses of passion. I want your dark side and I will always be here to take what others can not conceive exists in you."

I gasped when I rolled over to face him. I could only see a small part of the damage I had inflicted on his body, but that was enough to shock me.

"Oh god, what I have done? How could I have hurt you so if I really love you?" I lamented as I moved to get a better look at my mentors bruised and battered rear end.

"Because you know in your heart that is what I wanted. We made love as only two who are so perfectly matched can."

I made him let me inspect my handiwork. His thighs, hips and buttocks were bruised. Purple flesh was turning to black and there were cuts where my ring had torn his flesh. When I gently spread his ass open I found bits of drying blood around his anus. My promise to tear up his ass was fully realized.

"Is this really what you wanted?" I asked softly.