Truth & Consequences: Phil's Reply to Janet

Truth And Consequences---Phil's Reply to Janet

My apologies to capecodmercury. I tried, over, and over to contact him about adding to his great story, but was never able to. I loved the story "Truth and Consequences." There was no reply from Phil to this letter, and I just kept wondering what he would have said back to her. I realize that there is any number of forms his letter could have taken. For better, or for worse, this is just one of them. It is surely advisable to first read "Truth and Consequences" by capecodmercury, then read Phil's reply to his wife's letter to him.

Dear Janet,

If you are reading this letter, then I know you have received the divorce decree that was in the big envelope with it.

I will try now, as best I can, to explain my actions, and feelings that have caused me to give up completely on trying to save the bond between you and I. I am more sorry, disheartened, and depressed about this than you can possible imagine. I can't fathom living my life without you, and at times, I feel that I don't want to go on at all with my life. Losing you is like I have been split in half, and half of myself has been relegated to the land fill. I can hardly function, as I am so used to you being my right hand in work, in decisions, and a dozen other departments. Now that is all missing.

When I first started reading your letter, and all the way to about 2/3 of the way through it, my heart was lifted to heights that it had not seen, since the day I first began to suspect your infidelity to me, and our wedding vows. I thought "Well finally, she

is beginning to see what I have been trying with all my heart to get her to see all this time, for the last year." Even though you said at the outset that you were at least temporarily moving out, I knew that under the right circumstances, that you would fly back to my side, and I envisioned our marriage back on the track that I have been trying, and hoping that we could put it on for so long. As I was swamped with work because of a new contract we are desperately trying to gain, I didn't have the time to read but little parts of your letter at a time. It took me the better part of 4 days to finally wade all the way through it. During most of that time, I was deliriously happy, thinking of once again, holding you in my arms, and being able to feel that you finally understood the gargantuan enormity of the hurt, and humiliation that you piled on me, thinking me a fool, that was too slow to ever catch on to two quick witted people like you and your lover were. With me knowing from the very first day what was going on, and being able to absolutely see through all the many lies that you kept telling me, because I had the proof, it wasn't hard to figure out that you, even though you felt pangs of guilt over the emails, figured that I would never be quick enough to trap you in your lies.

Reading the first large part of your letter seemed to say to me that you had changed your opinion of me, and decided that I was worth being honest with, especially since I had managed to box you in on every single lie you fabricated. I was walking on air, feeling that you had decided I wasn't a fool, or a dummy, but that I was an equal, and deserved to be treated as such. HOW WRONG I WAS!!! From the first year of our marriage, I have been telling you that you learned a vicious trick while at your mother's knee, seeing her bring up things to your Dad during any kind of disagreement they might have, that had nothing whatsoever to do with what they were disagreeing about, but was designed to turn the heat from herself, onto your Dad, even though she might be clearly wrong, and at fault. Winning the argument always seemed to be the paramount goal in her arguments, not getting at the truth of any matter. Your Dad, being the gentle soul that he is, would always defer to her, in order to end the argument, rather than stand up to her. Now, you have tried that same trick on me, but wife, let me assure you, you are not dealing with your Dad now. Throwing up a smoke screen to try to divert my attention from you're guilt and make me think I am at fault will not work with me. Lady, I have people that are a good deal smarter than you, try that with me in the business world every day of my life. It doesn't work for them, and it won't work for you, now, or ever.

You said, in the turning point of your letter, that you finally held your motives up to the mirror and was ashamed of what you saw, …….BUT…..and there is always a BUT with you, and then you started the old end run again, trying to shift the blame to me. You called me a bastard, and asked me why I didn't fight for you. Once again, you are looking through the wrong end of the telescope., and seeing a distorted picture. What you are trying to disguise as a failure on my part to fight for you, was actually an effort to let you disengage yourself from the disgraceful behavior you were engaging in, thereby avoiding the problem we are facing right this minute. I had no intention of ever bringing your infidelity up, to you, or anyone on this planet, if you had backed out of the situation on your own, at any time, including even after all the emails containing language between you and your lover that you and your husband had never engaged in. You said to him, "I have been thinking about it a lot, and this time when we are together, I want you to cum in my mouth. I am so hot thinking about something so erotic like that that, I am close to an orgasm right now." "My fingers are all sticky with my juices. I wish you could suck them and clean them for me while I was cleaning your beautiful cock with my mouth. Oh well, I guess I'll have to suck them myself……mmmmmm…..I love the smell, and taste of sex. " As I recall, his answer to that in his next email was, "I am going to suck your sweet clit so hard that your nose is going to cave in. I want my whole head covered with your pussy juices, even the top of my head. I want my hair wet with your sex juices." Why was it that you, at any time that I initiated any kind of erotic sex talk, would chastise me, and tell me you hated talk like that, but, oh well, …..never mind, that's another subject. My point is, even after talk like that, if you would have shunned his advances at the conference, and showed just a little remorse, you would have never had a clue that I knew anything. You said yourself, in your letter, that I never showed any sign that I knew about your liaison with this man.

You didn't do that. You left your stupid cuckolded, stupid husband at home, knowing that you were going to march right into that man's room, suck his cock, let him suck your pussy until it was raw, and fuck him, all night, each and every night that you were at that conference.

And yet, …..and yet….you want to make out like I was to blame for all that, and put the monkey and the guilt on my back. My god woman, how God dam stupid do you think I am. You said that you are not trying to blame your behavior on me, but that's exactly what you are doing. You said you couldn't tell me whether you would have confessed to me, if I had confronted you with your lies that first night. You said you thought you would have. I vehemently disagree. You lied to me about every single aspect of that whole sordid affair, and yes, is was an affair. Don't you dare try to lessen it by calling it a little fling. It went on for nearly a year, when not in person, it was through triple X rated emails between the two of you. You said that if I had confronted you at any time, at least every thing past that would not have taken place. There again, knowing what I know about you now, I disagree. It would have happened at another time in another place, but maybe with another man. You would have probably sweet talked me out of leaving you, with promises to be a good girl, and promising to make it up to me, then as soon as you figured you had me hooked again, you would have been doing the same thing with either him, or someone else. That, my dear wife, is how far my trust, and my faith in you has sunken. It now lies at the very bottom of the deepest part of the ocean. It is unsalvageable. After reading your letter in it's entirety, I see that you are a scheming, lying, conniving version of your mother, and are just like her. I now have decided that I want nothing more to do with you at all. You can take your little act on the road, and try it on the next sucker that you run across. If I sound a little pissed, and am talking to you differently than I ever have before, it is because I am a lot pissed, do you hear me.? I am more pissed than I ever thought it was possible to be.

You said I just sat there, and let that asshole wear you down, offering you no support in your losing struggle to resist him. For God's sake Janet, riding shotgun for his wife to keep her from telling another man, "Oh yes, come and fuck me now" is not part of the job description for any husband. That is where the trust, and faith in her is supposed to enter in, but you have done just like good old Mom, and tried to make faith, and trust look like something bad, if I practice it. Dam that old witch anyhow!!

Near the end of your letter, you said that you hoped that I loved you enough to try to save our marriage. I don't. Your version of me loving you enough, is for me to let you steam roll over me, and for me to finally take the blame for all the shitty things you did to our marriage saying that if I had acted differently, you would have acted differently. That is a lie, hatched in the pits of hell, and you know it. It seems like you and Mom, have yourselves figured to be silver tongued devils that can talk, and bluff your way out of any problem. It might have worked on you're Dad, but I am not him, and your act is dead in the water with me. I am just a tad smarter than that. I am the number 3 man in a pretty big corporation who, buy the way, is slated to become the number 2 man very shortly when Jim Hawks moves to take over the Atlanta operation. My salary will more than double, and the perks that go with the job would make your mouth water. You could have been, and I wanted you to be, part of that at one time. No more. I am determined to seek out someone who holds the vows of marriage as sacred as I do, and who doesn't scheme and plot to have illicit sex with old boy friends, so she can keep the cravings within her body satisfied.

You said that the thing that made you fuck him in the first place, was that you had already gone two weeks without sex, and that I was a day late getting home from my last road trip. My God, if I had fallen ill, and stayed bedridden for six months anytime during our marriage, I suppose you would have had to turn tricks on the street, under an overpass somewhere in order to keep your cravings under control, huh. Jesus, sometimes you're logic just escapes me. I thought it was supposed to be men who's brains were in their sex organs. I had gone just as long as you without sex, but I never even considered doing what you did. I suppose that was because I took those vows we made to each other back then seriously, and believed in them.

You said at the end of your letter that you couldn't wait forever for me to make a decision. You don't have to wait at all. You made the decision for me with the last 1/3 of your letter. You said to call you, to inform you of my decision, but not to contact you for anything else, or try to see you. Consider it done with this letter, as I don't have time to fool with wasting any more of my time. I have to get my belongings ready to ship to the new house the company is providing for me on the lake shore. In addition I have to put my car in storage within the next day or two as I think, Friday I have to pick up the new one that goes with the new job.

I noticed that you ended your letter without saying love Janet. It just said Janet. I guess that says it all doesn't it??

Phil