All Comments on 'Jack and Diane Ch. 01'

You have me intrigued. Keep it going and do the chapters daily please.

Thanks Author - as a first start this is quite good in a subject most emotional and entertaining.<P>

We look forward to your continuance - and more in marital consequence at interval.<P>

With High Regard

Interesting even if it is a bit short. At this point we have the 'what happened' but little in the way of character developement. Presumably the author will give us some information about the husband and wife so that we can have an idea of why this is all happening. A good start to what may be a really interesting story.

Got my interest, I really want to see where this one goes. Nice start to what I hope will be a very good and more realistic story than most. Thank You.

For those who have commented, thanks for your encouragement. Sorry this is short. I wasn't sure how much would fill one page on the board. The bad news is I have submitted the second chapter and it is shorter. I'm sorry. If I'd known I'd have put them together. Ch 4 is written and Ch 3 in in preparation. I know! but 4 was written as 3 then I thought better of it. I take on board what you say and will post bigger chunks in future. Thanks again.

I love it when a plan comes together. this plot seems like there is a really great plan to do what your name says. Get-er-dun!!!!

A very weak story about a very weak man(?) married to a slut. This is the best Lit has to offer these days.

i do so hate it when i am into a story and then find out, 2 horshit short paragraphs later, it just unceremoniously stopped! <p>

at least give some of your readers some warning: something like, this is a short preamble to some masterpiece and so if it don't go down well, be glad it is short; but if you like it, know now it is gonna be short but the goodies are coming down the pipelines; or something stupid but courteous like that!

The story improved half way through, but your opening portrays a real weak excuse for a man. His wife says "go ,I'm bringing in my lover and divorcing you", wo he jumps and leaves. He then spends the next hour worrying about the quality of the water he is going to drink with his rum. This idiot can't be real.

60 year old George

Hi good start don't let some of these folks get to you I get stuff like this from time to time to.

You have set up a believable situation between Jack and Diane, but a not so believable one between Jack and Camilla. Thanks for letting us know that after the next short bit, chapters will come in reasonable lengths.

Liked it! More character development would help, but I'm hooked as it is. Thanks for the effort!

Agree it's a good start. Wondering what happened to part 2. It vanished. When can we expect more?

his wife screws around and moves her lover int ohis parents house ...that is so wrong a judge should move her out and move hubby back in ...if i was a judge id have her paying child support ...and living with lover boy instead of lover boy living with her in her in laws house ....seems like she is now no better than a whore ....so she deserves to be treated as what she is ...this is a case of wife being in the wrong so the kids should not suffer for moms stupidity

but, where the hell is the rest of it? It sort of quit in mid-sentence.

So far, you get a "Zip" from me on this one. Here's why: 1. Weak ass characters, 2. Focusing on inconsequentials (BTW: I'm delighted he found his bottled water for the Kettle.), 3. It ENDS in the middle of a character DIALOUGE!!! WTF????? I don't care that you portray your protagonist as a complete 'Wimp', you're the author, but so far, this is DRIVEL! Please tell me there's a second, or third part to this, and that your characters begin to act like real people not caricatures. I love cartoons, but not in print. Thanks.

what planet is the hubby from.

liked the style and flow well enough, though I'd expected some anguish, I can accept it's a 'memoir' and will read between the lines...Mancelt.

An interesting beginning, but too short to tell where this is going.

Was there no confrontation at the house when he went back to pack his things?A lot of information lacking from this trainwreck.

It's not even handed, so much the better. It's a bit of a chicken soup /fairy tale hybrid for men who've would up holding shifty end of stick when a relationship goes South.

This guy is the definition loser. It's no wonder the Cunt was cheating and booted the sissy. No one to like in this mess and it's only chapter 1.

Not much to give a great rating on, yet

the collective IQ of all males is 3, because the ones in these stories are dumber than rocks.

Hopefully get better

Fuck what a whiny little bitch who the fuck gets drunk on CHEAP RUM is this guy Captain Cuck Sparrow and this whole I'm still not myself what the fuck does that even mean fucking chicks say that shit not guys😂

Terrible when authors write stories about divorces when they know nothing of the law. Also we have "kids" come up at end without any explanation of how many or ages. Yet, in divorces, kids drive the results.

This guy is a complete idiot!

One of my mottoes is "tochthebitch forever"......CINCO ESTRELLAS!!