by karenmom
The pacing was nice; slow enough to have a build-up of tension, while still keeping things moving along. Your descriptions are wonderful, too. It's kind of a cliché plot, but your work made it unique. Thanks, and keep up the good work!
Very nice story and quite believeable . You should give us more ...
I'm not about to criticize your story. Your bio said 'some are real, some are fiction', I think this one's real. Having had similar real experiences, I can fully share and appreciate the thought process of the moment.You keep writing gal, each story will show improvement with more descriptive narratives.
A good story for a new writer. Can't wait to read more of your work.
You have things down and the description just right. Don't stop, you have it and it's best to keep running with it.
Definitely a Five Star entry! I love bro/sis love stories and would like to see you take this one further. You have already set the stage in the ending of this story. Since I'm a real sucker for forever love, I hope their story will go on. This was a really outstanding first submission. I hope to see many more from you.
A fantastic effort for a first story. A very good storyline and a good foundation for the characters to feel real. I would like to read more on the incestuous sex between the two. I have to say that you certainly have an erotic mind and I will look forward to reading anything that you post to the web. Thanks for the trip over the line of brother and sister love.
there is no way he is going to fuck her if he was so mad just because she kissed him keep it atleast sounding somewhat realistic people do not go from being mad as hell to fucking in a matter of minuets days or months maybe
Your story is too short, there's not enough build up. It goes from tears to fucking in almost a paragraph. The idea could be good but you gotta lengthen it
It's no surprise that a girl wants her big brother's big cock up between her legs. Lots of brothers and sisters think that's exactly where a brother's cock belongs. And, no surprise at all, a brother very often thinks the same thing. Like Dan in the story, a boy will look over his kid sister and say to himself, "Shit, she's got a really sweet little cunt and my prick'd feel real good up there." So he fucks his baby sister and blows his brotherly balls up her cunt, then brother and sister do it over and over again.
Very Good, Well written and a believable reaction of a brother and sister.
I love her style of writing because it isn't about just fucking. Instead it explores the intimate side of things.
Very sensuous. Sounds believable to me, but then I don't have a sister. There are a bunch of stories on here with the same situation (emergency "date" for prom), but this is one of the best. I was upset at the way the brother broke things off at the dance; and I wonder if his interest in sex at home was partly out of guilt/shame that he had behaved badly at the dance. ?
No porn cocks or huge racks. No unrealistic bro/sis talk. I mean my good friends call me bro not my sister. This was very very good. No group sex bringing in the parents or forced sex. This "ticked all my boxes" in a very short story.
Well done! If you add chapters to this, your brother's appearance at the prom, must have triggered lots of interest from your male classmates. Also, you did not say whether your brother took your cherry, so whether or not, you must have plenty of opportunities to get laid after the prom nite. Good editing. Keep writing.
XYZ
Very enjoyable story. I look forward to reading other hot and exciting stories of yours.