All Comments on 'How Would You Like That Bagged?'

She deliberatly commits adultery with of all people a fucking bag boy in a grocery store, how fucking lame is that ? Naturally the author made sure we knew that the bag boy (somewhat randomly seledted in the first place) was "well endowd" which the standard staple of the cliche stories of adultery when married women find a fuck toy (there was no love involved). This lie is absolutely ridiculous and it is supposed to add more eroticism to the unfaithul act of adultery, but it doesn't. What it does act is add a comic book story to a supposadly well written story but never mind this story was not well writtne besides not even being plausible.

Yeah right! A fucking bag boy!? You'd really have to be a worthless slut to do the fucking bag boy and want to go back! Her husband must be proud of her!?!?

How come the poor little dog wasn't suffocated by her 40DDs?

I actually couldn't care less who fucked her - in fact the bag boy was probably an intellectual giant compared to such a moronic woman.

The story was boring. It was not erotic. It was poorly written with all kinds of errors strewn across it.

In short, it falls a long way short of a second star and doesn't even really deserve one.

This is a woman's fantasy, understandable. You wouldn't do this sort of thing, just get off pretending. Go for it.

This story is NOT well writtne. (Sic)

I am SUER I could not say it Bettre!

2* (I am suer it was sinceer, so not a 1 for me)

Loving wives is one of the most contentious categories, quite often because it covers both cheating, cruel, vindictive women, as well as kind, loving, and often foolish women.

I liked your story, but it may have been better in say, Erotic Coupling. I'm guessing it was hotter for you because she was married, but her marriage was not really explored, we didn't meet the husband, and neither were really the focus. The focus was the hookup with the bag boy, which is fine.

Your writing needs a bit of proofing too.

I enjoyed it, and feel free to contact me if you'd like help or advice.

If you aren't comfortable editing, find someone who is. There is a whole thread in the forums to help you find someone to work with.

Tatortott did not follow this dud with any further stories. That is a blessing.