- Erotic Poetry
- as you are sand and I am sea
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Click herebarefoot moonwise skyclad
with long strides
upon your sand
I ride
the tides
betide the times
warm night enrobes
in folds enfold
wrapt in darkness
of your eyes
wide spread
everopen
and wanting
to take me in
pull me deep
swallow me whole
hold as the ocean
down within
rapture
as the see
beating softly
on the soft supple sand
of your shore
that which we leave
at the hig tide line
strange relics
odd old shells
of our past
that color our future
as we walk shore
between two worlds
an ever changing border
between me and you
- COMMENTS
suitepover 18 years agoMy favorite lines were:
strange relics
odd old shells
of our past
that color our future
The tempo of this poem laps like the ocean, and is soft and relaxed. Great job.
- suitep
cymryover 18 years agoI really enjoyed your poem. Especially these lines:
"I ride
the tides
betide the times
warm night enrobes
in folds enfold"
They have a rhythm that just rolls off my tongue.
Thank you.
cymryover 18 years agoI really enjoyed your poem. Especially these lines:
"I ride
the tides
betide the times
warm night enrobes
in folds enfold"
They have a rhythm that just rolls off my tongue.
Thank you.
Anonymousover 18 years agoI love the rhythm of the words slapping upon the shore! Well done.
Flyguy
Lauren Hyndeover 18 years agoThis is a graphically erotic poem of a higher-than-normal calibre - certainly, in my opinion, higher than any other posted today, and there were quite a few - but it also a sophisticated poem tout court period. At times, it feels as if it will slip out of control and lose to the realm of cliché, but that happens only in isolated verses - the overall structure of the poem is not clichéd. The pace with which it is handled is admirable, and there are some details - alliterations, near- and internal-rhymes, little word games - that are simply delicious to read.
Mentioned on the New Poems Reviews thread, at the Poetry Feedback & Discussion forum.
