Hot Night

Very nice. anon has some good points - keep up the good work.

which are a wonderful expression of a modern day liberated woman poet's physical description of lovemaking and her emotions. Let me make a few suggestions on some of the lines.

{long slow deep kisses

tongues dancin'} nice descriptive words

I'm your slutty princess } slutty- sets the tone but might be omitted

{fuckin' with you all the time} fucking with you can have more than one meaning

but here seems to be sexual, but not a feminine phrase

{feeling your arousal against me

our clothes fall to the floor

we are uninhibited and free

ooooo baby, I want more

shove me on the bed

taking complete control

pin my hands above my head} this is rhythmic and exciting

{shoving your cock in my honey hole} you are headed in the right direction but "honey hole" derails your effort, find a better word

{as my legs for you I spread} this is backwards, no rhyme here, be direct, "I spread my legs for you"

{kiss me fervently

lick me sensually

squeeze me tenderly

suck me feverishly

fuck me fanatically

make me writhe and moan

screaming out your name

keep me begging for more

and when we are spent

pull me close against you

with your hand across my tits

as we both drift off to dreamland} this is well done although one might upgrade from "tits" to "breasts". These lines are the meat of the poem, the best part and might even stand alone.

Good luck with your writing.