Illusions

A vicious adulterous heart beats keenly within me
Beating down all sense of fair play, I play my role to the hilt
Smiling through my pain, hoping the guilt doesn’t show

I have destroyed all the illusions formerly known as me
Opened the door into an ugliness previously unseen
Setting free the dirty little secrets hiding inside
Shell shocked onlookers remain watching warily for my next move

The price of redemption is too much to bear
Forgiveness is not an option left for one so destitute of spirit
Judgment, the only reflection in their eyes, scorns away hope
Forsaking a life that was built on a skeleton of lies
I step into the painfully bright spotlight of scrutiny

No longer bound to deceive, the truth is revealed
Greedily seeking what can’t be found in another
Only to find there’s no cure for the emptiness inside
The bitter taste of forbidden fruit souring my soul, damaged beyond repair
The life so carefully created, designed around convention, carelessly forgotten
Shattering the illusions formerly known as me.