Lyrical Masturbation (Female)

It's a quiet afternoon,
home alone, and the buzz
on social media is down.
No notifications.

There are clouds outside;
they submerge my room
in a pale blue light.
Birds chirp outside.
It's so serene.

This moment of stillness
draws my attention
away from the distractions
of my phone
and my thoughts.
My focus is drawn to my body,
to how it feels

It's day 12
and I acknowledge that sensation
in my lower abdomen,
that small fire begging to be fed some wood.
My skin's desperation for touch
Slowly growing from a whisper to a scream

I bite my lip.
A memory has slipped into my quiet mind,
like an athlete diving into a pool gracefully.
The water ripples
from my mind to the rest of me.
The memory isn't visual,
rather the beautiful sound
of him panting and moaning

I take a deep breath
as warmth pools beneath my stomach.
A dull throb,
like a voice singing in the distance,
ensues.

I put a pillow between my legs.
The only sound is my soft breathing,
the birds outside
and the sheets rustling beneath my body
as I position myself to lay on my stomach,
the pillow thick and pressing into my skin…
On my pubic bone,
my inner thighs,
the crevice of my ass
and the sensitive apex of my legs.

I exhale his name
and gulp down some accumulated saliva.
The pillow feels good here,
so I squeeze my thighs together.
Mmm… the throbbing grows slightly more intense
and so does that fire in my lower abdomen

I push my hips forward slightly
The pillow pressing back on my pubic bone
and my clit.
I focus on how it feels
when I squeeze my inner thighs
and thrust my hips forward
repeatedly

My imagination begins to frolick...
he's beneath me
in thin and tight shorts,
breathing heavily
as I lay down on top of him.
I kiss his neck
as his hand travels down my back...

"Ohh yes," I whisper.
The friction
feels so good.
As my breathing grows shallow,
I start clenching my butt cheeks
for added force.
More pressure
on all the right places.

I smile to myself
as I play with the idea
that this is practice
for the real thing:
grinding on him while he's hard.
The wood for the fire.

My body feels electrified and intoxicated.
I bite down hard on my bottom lip
as I sigh through my nose.
The next sigh isn't guarded,
mouth wide open.

My mind is filled with him
His voice
His face
The way I imagine he'd feel

...Faster.
I start to pick up my pace
He's grunting now,
as I whimper in his ear.
His grip is firm
on the flesh of my ass,
pressing me even deeper
as I thrust into his hips.
I can feel the shape of him
align with the shape of me...

The throbs spread from their epicenter,
my entire body
is permeated
with desire
and pleasure.
I want more,
this feels amazing.

My sighs evolve into moans
as I slow down
but grind deeper,
the pillow rubbing more firmly
on the now-wet material of my jeans.

Like a simmering pot of water,
I can tell that I’m nearing my climax.
I don’t want this to escalate to tumultuous boiling just yet
so I decrease the intensity of my thrusts
almost completely.
For a few moments,
I gather my breathing,
feeling my walls contract
and relax
slower and slower,
calming down.

I smirk at the thought
that he’s the one stopping me,
wanting me to feel this out for longer,
enjoying seeing me struggle
to control myself,
desperate for more.
I imagine him holding my hips in place
while I quietly beg for more
in between pants

...He lifts his lips to my ear
and puts his hands on my thighs.
for a moment, he only breathes.
I feel him pulsing too
“Now you may continue”
he says in a low whisper,
simultaneously making me gasp
as he squeezes my thighs....

My focus is back
on the excitement
between my legs.
The nerve endings
waiting in anticipation
to reward me for granting them more friction.

I say his name
as if it's the turning key
that causes an engine roar to life
I grip the sheets like they're handlebars
I steady myself
A green flag is hoisted in my mind’s eye
I’m ready to ride

I arch my back
The pillow rubs against all the sensitive places I like having stimulated,
including a slightly greater focus
on my anus
and Perineum.
I moan as I grind deeply inwards
I moan louder as I arch my back and lift my hips
shuddering at the incredible sensations
I’m experiencing

I start becoming more rough with my strokes
and throaty with my moans,
unhinged by the pleasure,
eyes rolling to the back of my head,
thumping noises coming from the mattress
I swing my hips in and out
as the pillow grazes
against all the areas
that are blushing
and swollen
in arousal

I’m thinking about him telling me to keep going
I’m thinking about him moaning in my ear
I’m thinking about him telling me how good this feels
I’m thinking about him saying my name breathlessly
I’m thinking about him
about him
him

My last few thrusts are slow
precise
intense

A tidal wave approaches

My entire being contracts as I orgasm.
My head tilts back and the muscles in my throat pop out;
everything explodes as I moan louder than I ever have before

A few more rapid strokes
as I say his name over and over
pleasure and electricity
jumps up and down my insides and soul
like a ping pong ball
ecstasy slowly engulfs my entire being

Slowly everything untenses, my entire body relaxes