Presents and Promises

He always knows
He can always tell
When I'm tired of
compromising
When I'm tired of being
not the wife
When I'm ready to say
fuck it all and
walk away
He always knows
And he always fixes it

Today
he walked into my house
And took a small box
out of his pocket
And opened it, and said
I know you deserve more
This is just a placeholder
until I can get you
something special
We will go shopping together
And you will pick what you want
But this is for you
to wear until then
And he took the delicate
gold chain
with the delicate
O-ring circle
out of the box
And he fastened it
around my neck
Then he kissed me
On my lips and
my forehead
And held me in his arms
And told me he loved me
And called me baby

I have been hinting for
my gold collar
since he promised it to me
almost a year ago
Every time I wear an outfit
that calls for gold jewelry
I take off my silver collar
and it makes me sad
to not have a piece of him
around my neck

And Christmas was coming
And I was wondering
if he would get
her
a Christmas gift
and not me
And I was preparing myself
to walk the fuck away
if he did

But he didn't
And now
no matter what I wear
I get to wear him
around my neck too
In some ways,
I am a very old fashioned girl
Flowers, candy and jewelry
from my man
make me happy

She is more practical
And not at all romantic
She wanted some
bullshit scrapbooking machine
And he got it for her
And she was happy with it

But he got me jewelry
And told me he loved me
And kissed me
And held me
And made me promises
That I hope he can keep

But I am not foolish
I know he is a promise
maker
And sometimes
a promise
keeper
And sometimes
a promise
breaker
And every time
he keeps a promise
to me
he breaks a promise
he made
to her
And every time
he keeps a promise
he made to her
he breaks a promise
he made
To me

And I know
he tries to
give us both
what we want
and need
from him
Which is why
he is
a different man
to me
than he is
to her

I wonder if all men
treat their girlfriends
differently than
they treat their wives

I get
kisses
and sweetness
and romance
and hand holding
and hot sex
and time
and conversations
and flowers
and jewelry
and love

And she gets
his determination
to keep
a 25-year-old
promise

And maybe
It's wrong but
I'm still
mostly ok
with that