If I had truly been searching for myself I would have found her,
If I hadn't had so many mishaps with vulgar evil men then
I might have had the chance, felt the desire, the courage and
felt safe enough to discover the truth of my own
She would have had a chance to develop early instead of now, the chance to be comfortable with simply one man, instead of having terror struck into her.
Forced upon instead of becoming willing.
And still my quiet nature is what drew these cruel creatures in, fueled their unjust deeds and coaxed forth my pain; only to lock it away in the depths of my trembling heart by hisses of hate.
Tears were not enough to convince myself that I could be free, instead she lay dormant and afraid, finally receding within my deepest soul.
Locked away, seemingly untapped, untouched.
Never to be seen again by any peaceful, faithful lover.
Replaced by a shield of quiet defense.
Soon after being left alone to grow and learn, my heart begins to love.
Discovers what love really is, the life, the depth, the trueness of sharing with another, the bond of trust was formed between I and my tender lover.
Only then does she lift her face towards the surface, seeming to recognize that it is safe to be revealed in full.
Unknown by even myself, she slowly rises up from her place of rest within.
Timidly showing herself in the nature of me and my lover's bed.
Softly she keeps unraveling past wrongs by surrendering completely to her lover.
His faithful, honest heart secretly sees her but keeps silent.
Watching, waiting, learning as we love and make love.
His touch is always mindful and tender.
Whispering love and affection to me even as our days grow routine.
When suddenly he reveals that he sees her and wants her!
Wants to draw her out and learn more about her.
To slake her desires and his own, by giving me a chance to discover what she and I have in common.
My flesh trembles with a burning recognition as his heated words of passion drift upon my ears. His voice strange to hear it's newborn tone as he coaxes her from the protective chamber.
Breaking forth from within myself, she and I at long last feel safe to meld as one,
to become a singular thought, a common desire.
My lover's voice strokes and flatters me as I stretch into my new realization.
My mind and body finally in tune with one another.
My lover becomes my Master as he ties me up.
My lover becomes my Sire as his large palm spanks me.
My lover becomes my Mate as he winds locks of curls into his grasp and tugs.
My lover becomes my King as his length pushes into the depths of my throat.
My lover becomes my Beloved as his hard rod thrusts into me.
My lover Loves me as he names me his Wench.
My lover and I are One as he Discovers and Desires
My Slave Within.